You need to remember and write down the reasons you left so that you can come back to reality. Abusive partners can seem like the most charming, best friend when they are trying to entice you back into their web. During your first time away, spend your time doing things you enjoy and being safe. I had a therapist during the time I was leaving and for awhile after, which really helped. Your friends and family just don't have the boundaries to really help keep you safe. Also, move to another location and do not provide the abuser with the address. Put blocks on your phone, email and facebook.
Get support from a loved one. Abusers try to alienate you so that you must rely on them. Open your eyes and prevent the situation from happening again by staying close to people you trust and being weary of possible abusers. Never be away from family and friends. Lastly but most importantly develop a relationship with god and learn to value yourself
LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND REALIZE YOU DESERVE BETTER
Think of your child all grown up... would it be ok with you for him/her to be in the situation you are in? If not, you need to find any way you can to end it completely and safely. No matter what kind of abusive situation or unhealthy relationship the most dammage is done by repeating your choices and patterns.
I wish I knew how to answer besides hitting the "improve answer" button. That just seems like I am improving on someone elses answer and that is ot what I am trying to do. I am just trying to answer. Anyhow, after an entire life of battering, beginning in childhood (my father raped my mother and my mother was full of outrage and took it out on me all my childhood) I have been single and alone for more than five years. This was the best thing I ever could have done for myself even though at first I did not want to be alone and couldn't imagine not being "in love". But this time alone has given me so much insight into myself and abusers. Now there is not one abuser in my life of any kind, not even an abusive family memeber. If my so called "family" can't be decent to me they can hit the road just as much as any stranger. I can now spot abusers by their actions and attitudes and even the tone of their voice. I can spot an abuser who laughs inappropriately when there is nothing funny, or purses his lips in amusement when there is nothing to be amused about. I've been stalked as a single woman, sexually harrassed, preached at, solicited for prostitution, have known men who thought they could "buy" me and then own me. No one owns me, I am as free as can be, free to be myself. The hardest part has been financial but I'm okay with a simple safe and sane life. My advice, get your own place, one that you can afford, and you'll be greatful that every night when you come home from work you dont' dread going home to an abuser, and every morning when you wake up he isn't there to hate you. If you pay your own way you are essentially an equal (although you always were) and you can speak your mind and be yourself and if they don't like it, that's ok because they aren't paying your bills. And if they don't like what you say or do, however harmless, innocent or just human, all you have to do is walk away and you don't have to argue with anyone about your right to grow and develope and learn and make mistakes and do good things and just be yourself and a human being. I'd love to have love in my life. But since all I've ever had is hatred, contempt, hypocrisy, disrespect, double standards, domination, treachery, betrayal and the absolute denial of my needs and even my existence (yes! denial of my existence, a verbal denial), well I'd rather be alone. None of that stuff has anything to do with love, it is someone who is extremely bent out of shape because he can't accept the fact that he doesn't make all the decisions. Decisions are to be shared and you make choices and decisions too, and hopefully you have decided to choose the good.
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Love yourself. If you love yourself, you're not going to let anybody physically abuse you or even emotionally. Plus, I'm pretty sure you're gonna find someone better. Some who will really love you. I know it's overly used, but it's true love doesn't have to hurt.
Your family, in particular your mother, will be the best one to help you stay away from an abusive relationship. Therapy will work but without strong love you will not stick. Talk with your family and they will give you the strenght to say enough is enough. Always remember that only a mother's love cured your bad days through childhood. Build a bridge of trust with your mother, father, siblings and you'll prevail. No man is worthed to make you lose your self-respect and the respect from your family.
Some things you can do to keep an abuser away from you are: # You can go to the police and file for abuse charges and/or get a restraning order. # Move out of the residence you share with the abuser. Try to find a family member/friend who will allow you to live with them. Or go to a battered women's shelter. # Don't let the abuser know where you live/phone number. Tell everyone you know not to give information to the person. If you have children, notify their school that the abuser is not allowed to pick up the children for any reason. # Go to the police and ask to file a TRO (temporary restraining order). Keep a journal and write down every incident of harassment that the person says or does to you. Contact the police if they threaten you or your family. The TRO can not protect you from violence, but if the person breaks the restraining order by coming near you, they can be arrested. # Have a cell phone with you at all times. Keep mace or a small weapon with you. Take a self defense course.
away from his children? get a restraining order, and physically remove the children from his location. to keep an abusive father away from all children he would need to be in prison, probably. children are everywhere.
I think that if you get a PFA that can help but do not let him violate it even if he just asked hows the kids doing. Do not answer him an call to report any contact that he tries to have with you, that way he gets the point that you are very serious about the situation. I am going through the proses right now. your not alone, there is more women out there that are abused then are even reported. It took me going on three years.
When you discover a partner is abusive whether it be Mental, Physical, or Sexual abuse be smart enough to GET OUT.
Other than that unfortunately there is no real way of avoiding them as most abusers are relatively quiet and stay unabusive for what could be quite sometime before they show they're true colors.
Still I stand by what I said before, once a partner is discovered to be abusive get out and stay out.
Keep them away from the father and make an agreement with him not to be verbally abusive to your children
It is not a requirement that children visit with your in-laws. If there is proof of abuse, this can be used to fight a possible grandparents rights battle in court.
Pay them attention and love them as much as you can...more if you were raised in a dysfunctional environment. And keep their father as far away as possible - I think that is what does even more damage than a distant mother, the abusive narcissistic parent is the one that forces them to retreat to a fantasy world where they are safe and omnipotent.
Privacy laws. They aren't married so she can keep information away from him forever.
Unless he's abusive, an alcoholic, a repeat criminal, a drug addict, doesn't provide for his children or has a partner that is either of these - you can't. The father has the same every right to access the child as the mother.
Good question...but no you cannot. When you go for the paternity test, the lab technician takes a picture of you and the baby.
Yes, if he is the children's father, and you are not the ex's new husband (the children's stepfather) it is possible. The outcome will be decided by a judge.
It depends on the exact circumstances, but absent any clear danger from them, yes, it probably is wrong.
Take him to court!
they should by no junk food and keep them energized
Since his father didn't let him keep Shiloh, Marty found an abandoned shed and kept Shiloh in there, but didn't tell his father. His father didn't let him keep it because he was owned by a man named Judd Travers i think that was his name
Yes. That would be a parent's prerogative.