Is it illegal to hit your kids in Queensland?

Answer 1

If you want to know whether your parents are allowed to hit you, or to use other forms of violence - physical or mental - against you, in order to teach you what is right, this is something you need to discuss within your family, though not necessarily with your parents to begin with.

If you feel your parents are going too far in using violence against you in order to teach you to behave nicely, you should approach someone you can trust: a school, church, or community counselor, or perhaps your doctor. Discuss the matter with them and see where you can go from there.

When a child asks someone, or an organization (like WikiAnswers) whether their parents can legally hit them, some might suggest this is because the child wants to do whatever they like and then tell their parents they'll report them for child abuse if they try applying discipline. It's pretty rare, though, for a child to take that step, in this way; when a child asks this question it's possible the parents are already going too far in the name of discipline, and that's when the child, or you - if you're worried about yourself, or another child - must seek outside help.

If, on the other hand, you are a parent living in Queensland, Australia, and needing to know whether you can legally hit your children, or to use other forms of violence - physical or mental - against them, in order to teach them the things you believe are important for them to learn, you'll need to speak with an expert in that area. So many factors are involved under Queensland legislation that it isn't possible to give a black-and-white, yes-or-no response.

If you believe you really need to hit your children in order to teach them to behave well, then of course you need to know whether, in your area, you can legally hit them and, if so, how hard you can hit them, for how long, and so on. You can contact a legal aid office, where you can receive advice or information on where to get the advice you need. Your first call, though, might best be to the local Government department which can help you with information on legislation affecting parents and children: the link below will give you details. Don't be tempted to rely on information from popular media, or even from friends or family: the matter is far too important to rely on advice which might be inadequate, incomplete, or even simply wrong.

Until you find out exactly where you stand in law when you hit your children, it'd probably be safest to investigate alternative methods of convincing the kids to behave the way you want them to, which is, of course, to do the right thing wherever possible.

The very first step to take here is to teach by example. If you don't show your kids the right way to go, they're not going to listen when you tell them the right way to go. That'd be like hiring someone who can't drive round a corner without hitting a stop sign, to teach the kids to drive. So if you want your kids to learn that it's wrong to tell lies, to hurt people or creatures, to steal, to damage property, and so on, you're way ahead already if they don't already know that you do any of these things. You could empower them a bit here, by getting suggestions on how you could avoid, for instance, yelling into the phone when you've been left on hold for way too long. Turning the situation into fun is good: people remember things that made them laugh. Don't you?

Your kids will inevitably see other people doing wrong things, in your neighbourhood, on television, in the news: you could take the opportunity to discuss what's being done wrong, why it's wrong, and how we, individually and also as a family, can avoid doing that kind of thing ourselves. This is probably a very good second step towards raising children to do the right thing.

Casual discussion on topics involving right, wrong, and in-between is a great way to teach. If your children pick you up on something you've done, but which you tell them not to do, don't be defensive, and don't make excuses: kids see straight through hypocrisy and quickly lose respect for those they believe are hypocrites, or those who won't own up when they obviously know they're wrong. You could talk about how we learn from doing something wrong: how we can try to avoid making that mistake again; why we should avoid making that mistake again. For example: next time you're stuck on hold, maybe use the time to do something you've been meaning to do anyway, and why? Because, when the person finally gets on the line, you'll be in a reasonable mood and might get something done, which you won't if you yell. Call this step three.

Don't make a big deal about things your kids might've done wrong; you can refer, instead, to something a person outside the family has done, and discuss how you all think about that behavior, and what other people involved should do. Humorous suggestions welcome, of course.

By this time you should be ready for step four, which is when you find out all about how much you're legally allowed to hurt your children.

Then you can all discuss that advice together, as a family.