What are some good horror jokes?

Answer 1

First of all this is the top Horror story in history. It's only scary when you tell it at night, though. Tell it to a friend of yours at night, please:

The last man on earth is sitting in a room.

There's a knock on the door.

DATE: Friday, 6th July, 2012

This is a REAL scary story. If you think its not real, I'm pretty sure it is.

The girl with the pony tail

Once my friend went to walk home with me... three days ago? (I THINK AFTER MY DETENTION WAS OVER) Anyway, I was very satisfied of coming home but my friend (Milly) said

''Why don't we stay at mine for the day and you can home later.'' she said

I disagreed, I wanted to get home immediately! Milly was begging me to come (I SERIOUSLY DON'T KNOW WHY) I finally said ''Yes'' and we walked to her house. Then when we got there she said

''This is my cousin, Sophie.'' said Milly, smiling at her.

If we go a little forwards.... FOR THIS PART, I asked how old she was, shes nine.

Anyways, coming back to the part we was on, she had a very very dark brown hair color with a pony tail looking up at me. She seemed very dangerous (I could see it in her big brown eyes. Standing next to her was a another girl with dark blonde hair with green eyes staring at me like Sophie.

''Is this what you wanted to show me Milly?'' I asked.

''Well, actually yeah...'' she said rolling her eyes.

I wanted to plan an escape by running home and beating my high score on my Xbox 360 but that didn't happen... Sophie went in the bathroom, I followed her. she suddenly picked up a bag with a clown on it and closed the door.... I actually didn't know what happened next (she shut the door) I really wanted to know what was going to happen! So I opened the door and asked what she was doing.

''I'm not doing anything!'' she shouted.

I convinced her to tell me and she told me.

''I found out this story about a little girl that got haunted and I want to know whats going to happen if I try it my self!''

I wanted to do it with her so I did. she said

''Pony tail girl, pony tail girl, show me your pony tails you grab with.''

Then she started to choke! I got worried and screamed for help and then that girl I saw next to Sophie with dark blonde hair appeared and then something happened to her hair! It then looked like she had pony tails. With her hair she wraped it around Sophie's neck and disappeared. Sophie was still there though, and I found out that girl was a ghost... probably I guess? I'm not sure... Since those three days ago, I will never forget what happened to my friends cousin.

Thanks for reading guys! By Answergirl190

P.S: When I looked in the hole when she closed the door not all closed I did not know exactly what happened when she was with the clown bag. I feel a little special cause I saw that girl. Probably some of you that are special can actually see her, some of you can feel her or sense her (at least its close enough.)

If I learn more about that girl thingy I'd tell you but this is all I got. I love ghosts and stuff like Bloody Mary! I research about it all the time, maybe that's why the ghosts chose me...

Answer 2

URM....

A mum had a baby and they were happy together. One day, the father is at work and at night the mum gets text saying: IM AT YOUR FRONT DOOORRR!! she carried on ironing. then she gets another text saying: IM AT THE BOTTOM OF THE STAIRS!! she gets a bit worried but carries on. then she gets another text saying: IM HALFWAY UP YOUR STAIRS!!! she is very worried now and calls the police but the phone line had been cut out. she gets another text saying: IM AT THE TOP OF YA STAIRS. She is sooo worried now. Then she gets another text saying: I'VE KILLED YOUR BABY. she finds the baby dead in the cot with a smiling doll next to her...

itss quite creepy. BTW i have seen bloody mary!

Answer 3

Some of my favourite short horror stories are:

* "The Viaduct" - Brian Lumley
* "The Yellow Wallpaper" - Charlotte Perkins Gilman
* "The Facts In The Case of M. Valdemar" - Edgar Allen Poe
* "Uncle Otto's Truck" - Stephen King
* "A Woman Seldom Found" - William Sansom
* "The Hospice" - by Robert Aickman
* "The Nine Billion Names of God" - by Arthur C. Clarke (technically sci-fi)
* "The Long Distance Call" - by Richard Matheson
* "The Red Cap Spectre of the Robertson" - by E. Downs

Hope you enjoy my selection :-)

Answer 4

i told this story on camp once and the girl i told it to had to be escorted back to her cabin cause she was so scared:

1. there was a girl called sally and she was driving interstate when her car brokw down. she was in a kind of remote area, and the local car repair shop had cabins for customers such as herself. she checked her car in and got the keys to a room from the receptionist. "just remember", he said, "dont go out of your cabin at night." so sally went into her room and that night she was curious as to why she couldnt go outside, so she looked through the keyhole. outside was a woman, pacing back and forth outside the cabing blocks. she had purple hair and a black dress. "she's obviously the guard" thought sally. the next day, she checked with the receptionist for her car, but it still wasnt ready. "just remember", he said, "dont go out of your cabin at night." so that night sally looked out the keyhole again, and saw the same women. "well shes been here twice, so she must be the guard" thought sally. the next day, her car was still not ready, so the receptionist gave her the same warning, and she again looked out the keyhole. only this time, she couldnt see out of it, it was just all red with a little dot in the middle. the next day, she picked up her car, and asked the receptionist why she couldnt leave the cabin at night "well," he replied, "theres a murderer on the loose...she has purple hair and wears a black dress...oh yeah, and she apparently has red eyes"

ok i got told this in lockdown once when we were all sitting in the corner hoping it was just a drill and not a real psycho murderer roaming around:

2. there was this girl who was babysitting a little kid who was about 10months old. the baby girl was in a room on the ground floor that was really wide and really long with a window at each end. the girl heard the baby crying, so she went to the room, picked her up and comforted her. when she put the baby down, she noticed the neighbour outside waving from the window, so she waved back and went back to watching TV. a little while later, the baby started crying again, so she went in and comforted it and the neighbour was still waving, so she waved and said "i've waved to you, you can go now. you're freaking me out, and if you dont leave, i'll call the police". a couple minutes later, the baby was crying again, so she went to the room, but before she could open the door, the crying stopped. she thought this was really weird, as the baby had never stopped before she had picked it up before. she went in and looked in the cot, but the baby was gone! then she heard a splat and looked up. a huge streak of blood had just landed on the wall. she looked up to the ceiling fan, and there was the baby, hanging from its partly severed head on the fan. she ran out and called the cops, who brought the mother to the house. "was anyone in here with you?" asked the cops " no," she replied, " but the neighbour was waving from the window". the mother went pale. "thats not a window...thats a mirror"

hope they are suitably scary :)

Answer 5

What happens when you mix the letters horr with or it spells horror

Answer 6

You can search Funny Scary Stories via ScaryForKids.com and from there are some "scary" stories that were all a total FAIL.

Answer 7

"The Russian Sleep Experiment"