An-THOR-Logy

• Artist: Thor
• Rating:
• Release Date: August 16, 2005
• Type: Video
• Genre: Rock

Review

This DVD makes a good case for underground metal sideshow Thor as the ultimate missing link between the mid-'70s rock & spandex theatrics of Alice Cooper and Kiss, and the next decade's humorless metal macho men in Manowar -- not to mention a few dozen bad ideas besides. It hardly matters that the man can hardly sing, this unprecedented collection of Thor sightings amounts to one thing: entertainment. For that is what Thor is, not a musician, not an actor, or a heavy metal muscle-head, but an entertainer. Watch as he stalks the stage with muscles flaring and sweat a-dripping; behold as he dons a dog-collar, purses his lips, and shimmies his hips to some cruel subversion of glam rock camp; thrill as he bends a steel bar with naught but his teeth and a towel; marvel as two motorcycle thugs assault him mid-set and proceed to break a cinder block across his skull; and, finally, simply, gawk in amazement as he blows up a hot water bottle with his bare lungs -- amid a Muzak-like performance of the Sweet's "Action" on the Merv Griffin Show, no less! These are but some of the nameless pleasures of this historical DVD release -- as definitive a career retrospective (even with date cut-offs between '76 and '85) as one is likely to see about what has to be one of rock's most bizarre, indefensible, but surprisingly enduring novelty acts. Here amid the numerous tuneless and semi-professional live band performances and TV appearances (ranging from the not-so-bad proto-metal of "Keep the Dogs Away" to the horribly plodding Alice Cooper knock-off "Phantom of My Nightmare"), the inevitably goofy MTV promo clips (including the hysterical "Knock 'em Down," featuring Thor's Sheena-like female foil Pantera), and scattered oddities including everything from TV news reports, local cable access-show appearances (anyone remember Uncle Floyd? -- it's doubtful), and even commercials (Chevy tucks!). It's arguably the Thor-narrated "Thor-u-mentary" segment that's the most priceless, if for no other reason than his admission of working as a stripper at some point. From a technical point of view, all packaging, digital authoring, and most of the clips' audio and video are of barely professional grade (during "Only the Strong" they don't even sync!), but that's really not the point here. Rather, this DVD's 132 minutes of total playing time and assorted bonus contents -- between rudimentary attempts at homemade music videos (simply jaw-dropping) -- new millennium glimpses of our balding but still relatively buff hero at work, a career-spanning slide show, and full commentaries, constitute a truly priceless visual treasure on par with Spinal Tap. Which is to say that, as a proper heavy metal experience, An-THOR-Logy is, like most every Thor release in existence, a resounding letdown; but as pure rock & roll entertainment, it's an unqualified success. Most telling of all: you can't take your eyes off of it. ~ Eduardo Rivadavia, Rovi

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