Dear John letter

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A "Dear John letter" is a letter written to a husband or boyfriend by his wife or girlfriend to inform him their relationship is over, usually because the author has found another lover. Dear John Letters are often written out of an inability or unwillingness to inform the person face to face. The reverse situation, in which someone writes to his wife or girlfriend to break off the relationship, is referred to as a "Dear Jane letter."

While the exact origins of the phrase are unknown, it is commonly believed to have been coined by Americans during World War II. Large numbers of American troops were stationed overseas for many months or years, and as time passed many of their wives or girlfriends decided to begin a relationship with a new man rather than wait for their old one to return.

As letters to servicemen from wives or girlfriends back home would typically contain affectionate language (such as "Dear Johnny", "My dearest John", or simply "Darling"), a serviceman receiving a note beginning with a curt "Dear John" would instantly be aware of the letter's purpose.

A writer in the Democrat and Chronicle of Rochester, NY, summed it up in August 1945:

"Dear John," the letter began. "I have found someone else whom I think the world of. I think the only way out is for us to get a divorce," it said. They usually began like that, those letters that told of infidelity on the part of the wives of servicemen... The men called them "Dear Johns".

An early reference to Dear John letters was made in a United Press article of March 21, 1944.^[1]

There are a number of theories on why the name John is used rather than any other. John was a common name in the United States at the time the term was coined. John is also the name used in many other terms that refer to an anonymous man or men, such as "John Doe" or "John Smith". Another possible source for the term is the "Dear John" soap opera which was on the radio from 1933 to 1944.

The phrase "that's all she wrote" is believed to have originated from Dear John letters. These letters would contain either the words "Dear John" and abruptly terminate, or only contain the words "Dear John, goodbye." The phrase "that's all she wrote" is used to indicate the end of story or an abrupt end of story, especially when the reader has a desire to know more, but the writer does not want to fulfill that desire. An example of this connection can be found in the 1951 country hit "Dear John" by Hank Williams. In this song, the chorus proceeds as "...And that's all she wrote, Dear John..."

See also

• Love letter

Notes

External links

• "Origin of the Dear John letter"
• "Do-it-yourself form for 'Dear John' letter"
• "Video bye-bye" - on the urban legend of Dear John letters
• "Did you hear the one about ...."