Jesus Saves, also known by the titles "Jesus Can't Play Rugby" or "Jesus Can't Go Hashing" is a popular drinking song common among Hash House Harriers and rugby players. As with any rugby song, it is tongue-in-cheek and is consciously offensive. It is sung at socials among teams of many nations at nearly every level of competition. [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6]
Sung to the tune of Battle Hymn of the Republic (aka "John Brown's Body").
Traditional Lyrics
Chorus:
(Often sung while the participants dip their fingers in beer and flick it onto each other, a la the Catholic practice of Asperges.)
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- Free beer for all the ruggers (or hashers)!
- Free beer for all the ruggers!
- Free beer for all the ruggers!
- Jesus saves! Jesus saves! Jesus saves!
Verses:
Jesus can't play rugby 'cause:
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- the ball goes through his hands (x3).
- his dad will fix the game (x3).
- the Jew won't pay his dues (x3).
- he wears illegal headgear (x3).
- he wears illegal spikes (x3).
- he's only got 12 men (x3).
- the goalposts give him flashbacks (x3).
- he can't support a hooker (x3).
- his feet are nailed together (x3).
- he has open wounds (x3).
- he is fucking dead (x3). (can also be sung as "the motherfucker's dead")
- his mother won't put out.
- he has never gotten laid (x3)
- you can't bind onto his robe (x3)
- shepherds are illegal.
- he's hung up on the cross. (x3)
- he's hung like this (spread arms wide) (x3)
- he is stuck behind a rock. (x3)
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new Verse:
Jesus bring the party
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- he turns water into wine
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Final Chorus:
(everyone should kneel down and do the Sign of the Cross)
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- Jesus, we're only kidding!
- Jesus, we're only kidding!
- Jesus, we're only kidding!
- Jesus saves, Jesus saves, Jesus saves.
References
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