| Title |
Original Airdate |
Rating |
Director |
Production # |
Episode # |
| '"Pilot" |
January 9, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
101 |
1 |
| Malcolm, a suburban boy with a dysfunctional family, must deal with a bully and being transferred to the genius classes at his school. |
| "Red Dress" |
January 17, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Arlene Sanford |
102 |
2 |
| On the night of her wedding anniversary, Lois finds her red dress burned and in the toilet. She immediately blames Reese, Malcolm, and Dewey and tortures them into confessing. Meanwhile, Hal makes friends with the restaurant staff while waiting for Lois. |
| "Home Alone 4" |
January 23, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
103 |
3 |
| While Hal and Lois are away for the weekend, Francis (the older brother who was sent to military school) comes to babysit Malcolm, Reese, and Dewey, which turns to trouble when Francis' hoodlum friends also come over and trash the house. |
| "Shame" |
February 6, 2000 |
TV-PG LV |
Nick Marck |
104 |
4 |
| Malcolm beats up a bully, but upon learning that the bully, despite his weight and height, is actually seven years old, Malcolm feels guilty and participates in a fun-run in order to clear his conscience. Meanwhile, Hal cuts down a tree—and ends up angering a neighbor and Francis rebels against the military academy's sex education curriculum by creating one of his own. |
| "Malcolm Babysits" |
February 13, 2000 |
TV-PG LV |
Tod Holland |
105 |
5 |
| Malcolm's family moves into a trailer while their house is being fumigated, and Malcolm gets a taste of the good life while house-sitting for an upper-middle class couple. Meanwhile, Francis finds the corpse of a janitor named Lester in the basement of the military school and teams up with his friends to give the forgotten custodian a proper burial. |
| "Sleepover" |
February 20, 2000 |
TVPG LV |
Ken Kwapis |
106 |
6 |
| Malcolm stays overnight at Stevie's house and talks him into sneaking out to an all-night arcade after having to put up with Stevie's parents strict monitoring. Meanwhile, Reese has to give Dewey a bath in order to stay up and watch a scary movie, and a cult tries to break Francis's spirit while hazing him. |
| "Francis Escapes" |
February 27, 2000 |
TV-PG LV |
Todd Holland |
107 |
7 |
| Francis goes AWOL from military school for his crush, who turns out to be sleazy and abusive. |
| "Krelboyne Picnic" |
March 12, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
108 |
8 |
| Malcolm's class demonstrates their abilities at a picnic. Malcolm tries to get out of going because it's on the same day Francis comes home. |
| "Lois vs. Evil" |
March 19, 2000 |
TV-PG LV |
Todd Holland |
109 |
9 |
| Lois gets fired after Dewey steals a $150 bottle of cognac from the store, leaving the family struggling to make ends meet. Meanwhile, Francis is hired as a beauty pageant guard. |
| "Stock Car Races" |
April 2, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
110 |
10 |
| Hal takes the boys to see stock-car races on a school day. Meanwhile, Lois searches for her paycheck (which Hal took) and, with the help of Malcolm's Krelboyne class teacher, finds incriminating evidence against Hal and the boys while Francis sneaks a snake into the academy. |
| "Funeral" |
April 9, 2000 |
TV-PG LV |
Arlene Sanford |
111 |
11 |
| Malcolm tries to avoid going to Lois' unlikable aunt's funeral so that he can go on his first date, but the funeral plans are canceled when Lois puts herself on strike and spends the rest of the day relaxing in a bubble bath. |
| "Cheerleader" |
April 16, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
112 |
12 |
| Reese joins the cheerleading squad to impress a girl he's interested in. |
| "Rollerskates" |
April 30, 2000 |
TV-PG LV |
Ken Kwapis |
113 |
13 |
| Hal teaches Malcolm how to rollerskate, but Malcolm becomes so frustrated, he calls his father an obscene name. Meanwhile, Lois hurts her back (after screaming so loud at Reese for tracking mud in the house) and Francis fakes a back injury in order to get out of a camping excursion. |
| "The Bots and the Bees" |
May 7, 2000 |
TV-PG LV |
Chris Koch |
114 |
14 |
| With Lois visiting Francis at military school, Hal helps the Krelboynes make a robot. |
| "Smunday" |
May 14, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Jeffrey Melman |
115 |
15 |
| With Lois out of commission due to the flu, the boys take advantage of the situation by doing whatever they want while being grounded. Meanwhile, Hal considers buying a Porsche. |
| "Water Park" |
May 21, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Ken Kwapis |
116 |
16 |
| The family goes to a water park where Reese and Malcolm finally get their revenge on Lois. Meanwhile, Dewey stays home with an elderly babysitter (played by Bea Arthur), but when the babysitter has a stroke, Dewey goes away and has an adventure of his own. |
| Title |
Original Airdate |
Rating |
Director |
Production # |
Episode # |
| "Traffic Jam" |
November 5, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
201 |
17 |
| After being banned from the water park, the family gets stuck in a traffic jam. Meanwhile, Francis bets fellow cadets that he can eat 100 candy Quacks and Dewey tries to find his way home. |
| "Halloween Approximately" |
November 8, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
202 |
18 |
| When Francis comes home for a post-Halloween visit, he helps his brothers get back into the spirit by building a giant slingshot to terrorize the neighborhood. Meanwhile, Hal and Lois go to great lengths to stop a joyrider. |
| "Lois' Birthday" |
November 12, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Ken Kwapis |
203 |
19 |
| Reese, Malcolm, and Dewey blow the money used to buy Lois a birthday present on candy, sending the angry wife and mother to a fun center, where she takes out all her aggressions of being underappreciated in the batting cage. Meanwhile, Francis dates an african woman. |
| "Dinner Out" |
November 15, 2000 |
TV-PG LV |
Jeffrey Melmen |
204 |
20 |
| The family has an ill-advised dinner date with the Kenarbans and Francis regrets inviting local girls to a party at Marlin Academy. |
| "Casino" |
November 19, 2000 |
Original TV-14 V Now TV-PG |
Tod Holland |
205 |
21 |
| When the family vacations at a casino, Hal, Malcolm, and Reese wander into an Army artillery range after being kicked out for counting cards at a blackjack game. Meanwhile, Lois and Dewey win a day at the spa. |
| "Convention" |
November 22, 2000 |
Original TV-14 DLV Now TV-PG LV |
Jeffrey Melman |
206 |
22 |
| Hal and Lois wreak havoc out of town, while the boys struggle to behave themselves for a sexy babysitter (Melody Perkins). This episode was originally rated TV 14 DLV. |
| "Robbery" |
November 26, 2000 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
207 |
23 |
| Lois and Craig get caught in a robbery at the Lucky Aide, where Craig finally admits his feelings for Lois. Meanwhile, Hal and the boys bring home an armoire—and end up battling against the dozens of bats that live in it--as Francis tries to cheer up a recently dumped fellow cadet by taking him to a strip club. |
| "Therapy" |
November 29, 2000 |
TV-PG |
Ken Kwapis |
208 |
24 |
| Malcolm feigns mental illness in order to get out of the Krelboyne Class's Medieval Week. Meanwhile, Hal and Lois clean out a packed closet and find that it is actually a second bathroom, and Dewey reveals a hidden talent for table skittles. |
| "High School Play" |
December 10, 2000 |
Original TV-14 DS Now TV-PG LS |
Jeffrey Melman |
209 |
25 |
| Malcolm gets a role in a high school play and becomes obsessed with gossip. Meanwhile, the Krelboyne teacher, Caroline Miller, gives birth in the school parking lot when the Krelboynes' model rocket launch goes awry and Hal and Dewey create a LEGO city. |
| "The Bully" |
December 17, 2000 |
TV-PG V |
Jeffrey Melman |
210 |
26 |
| After being beaten by a girl in a wrestling match, Reese relinquishes his bullying image, which is bad news for Malcolm. Francis tries to avoid his birthday in the academy because his cadets will shave his hair off on his birthday. |
| "Old Mrs. Old" |
January 7, 2001 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
211 |
27 |
| Malcolm must help an old woman (Florence Stanley) in the neighborhood with whatever she wants of him, and he ends up driving her car. Francis' boyhood friend Ritchie is sent to the same military academy. |
| "Krelboyne Girl" |
January 14, 2001 |
TV-PG LV |
Arlene Sanford |
212 |
28 |
| Malcolm meets the new girl Cynthia (Tania Raymonde), who starts to have a crush on him. |
| "New Neighbors" |
January 21, 2001 |
Original TV-14 S Now TV-PG S |
Ken Kwapis |
213 |
29 |
| Malcolm's family contends with a family even more insane than they. Meanwhile, Commandant Spangler gets drunk on the day that Ollie North visits Marlin Academy. |
| "Hal Quits" |
February 4, 2001 |
TV-PG S |
Ken Kwapis |
214 |
30 |
| Hal quits his job after a disastrous career day at Dewey's school. Meanwhile, Francis takes his friend, Eric, to a strip club after Eric succumbs to depression following a break-up. |
| "The Grandparents" |
February 11, 2000 |
TV-PG V |
Todd Holland |
215 |
31 |
| Lois' evil parents (Robert Loggia and Cloris Leachman) visit and cause havoc in the home for everyone (save Reese). Meanwhile, Hal buys a new refrigerator. |
| "Traffic Ticket" |
February 18, 2001 |
TV-PG L |
Jeffrey Melman |
216 |
32 |
| Lois disputes an accusation of reckless driving, and orders Francis to pay off the $750 in motoring fines he has accumulated in her name. |
| "Surgery" |
February 25, 2001 |
TV-PG L |
Jeffrey Melman |
217 |
33 |
| Malcolm is sent to the hospital for appendicitis...and is neglected when the rest of the family obsesses over the board game March and Conquer. Meanwhile, Francis and his cadets go on a hunger strike after Commandant Spangler takes away their television. |
| "Reese Cooks" |
March 4, 2001 |
TV-PG L |
Jeffrey Melman |
218 |
34 |
| Reese discovers the joys of cooking while taking a culinary class as punishment for a prank. Meanwhile, Francis keeps blowing off a major project. |
| "Tutoring Reese" |
March 11, 2001 |
TV-PG-L |
Ken Kwapis |
219 |
35 |
| Malcolm tutors Reese to improve his lousy grades, but soon discovers that Reese's teacher is sabotaging his plans to succeed. Meanwhile, Francis leaves the family and lives with his hoodlum friend, Richie. |
| "Bowling" |
April 1, 2001 |
TV-PG V |
Todd Holland |
220 |
36 |
In this Sliding Doors-style story, the viewer simultaneously sees what happens when the boys go bowling with Hal and what happens when they go bowling with Lois. Meanwhile, Dewey stays at home after getting in trouble for killing the neighbor's parakeet.
NOTE: This episode won two Emmy Awards.
|
| "Malcolm vs. Reese" |
April 22, 2001 |
TV-PG LV |
Todd Holland |
221 |
37 |
| Francis bribes Malcolm and Reese with tickets to a wrestling match, forcing them to humiliate themselves and do all his chores, which later turns into a battle of revenge on each other. Meanwhile, Lois accidentally burns down Craig's apartment, and Craig moves in with the family. |
| "Mini-Bike" |
April 29, 2001 |
TV-PG L |
Ken Kwapis |
222 |
38 |
| Craig drives the family insane while living with them, the boys buy (and crash) a mini-bike, and Hal participates with Francis at Marlin Academy's father/son field day. |
| "Carnival" |
May 6, 2001 |
TV-PG L |
Ken Kwapis |
223 |
39 |
| Reese, Malcolm and Dewey plot to hitchhike with Stevie to the county fair. |
| "Evacuation" |
May 13, 2001 |
TV-PG |
Todd Holland |
224 |
40 |
| Hal and Dewey accidentally drop a couch on the railroad tracks, and the town ends up being evacuated after a train containing toxic waste derails. Meanwhile, Francis and Eric go on double dates. |
| "Flashback" |
May 20, 2001 |
TV-PG |
Jeffrey Melman |
225 |
41 |
| While Hal worries over the possibility of Lois being pregnant again, the two look back at the memories of their children's births, from Francis being born while Hal and Lois get married to Dewey's birth after Hal gets a new job. |
| Title |
Original Airdate |
Rating |
Director |
Production # |
Episode # |
| "Houseboat" |
November 11, 2001 |
TV-PG |
Todd Holland |
301 |
42 |
| Malcolm's family and the Kenarbans spend vacation together on a houseboat, while Reese and Stevie hang out with girls who like to take off their bras. Francis has started to be annoyed with the military academy. |
| "Emancipation" |
November 14, 2001 |
TV-PG |
James Simons |
302 |
43 |
| Francis gets emancipated, while Malcolm deals with a new teacher (Chris Eigeman). |
| "Book Club" |
November 18, 2001 |
TV-PG L |
Todd Holland |
303 |
44 |
| Lois attempts to escape the boys' nightly misbehavior by joining a women's book club, but she soon realizes that the night is merely an excuse for the women to socialize—and to plot against a PTA mom who seems to handle her children and all other motherly duties with ease. Meanwhile, Hal struggles to keep the boys in order and away from the illegal fireworks hidden in the backyard. |
| "Malcolm's Girlfriend" |
November 25, 2001 |
TV-PG L |
Ian Busch |
Ken Kwapis |
304 |
45 |
| After getting a girlfriend (whose face is never shown on camera), Malcolm begins to neglect his family, who overreact when they find out about her, and friends. Meanwhile, Dewey gets a new friend, and uses his friend's wealth for his own needs. The 1998 version of the Sesame Street theme song was played |
| "Charity" |
December 2, 2001 |
Originally TV-14 Now TV-PG L |
Jeff Melman |
305 |
46 |
| When Lois forces the boys into community service to build character, they choose to work at a church charity. After a series of events, they go from trading their own stuff to stealing the merchandise and creating a black market. Francis finally reaches his destination in Alaska. This episode was originally rated TV-14. |
| "Health Scare" |
December 9, 2001 |
Dan Kopelman |
Todd Holland |
306 |
47 |
| When news hits that Hal may have a serious illness, Lois becomes meaner than usual. Meanwhile, Francis has a showdown with combative Lavernia in Alaska, and Dewey becomes overzealous in taking care of his class's pet hamster. |
| "Christmas" |
December 16, 2001 |
Maggie Bandur |
Jeffrey Melman |
307 |
48 |
| Lois issues an ultimatum - the boys behave or Christmas is canceled. Francis must spend Christmas with Grandma Ida. |
| "Poker" |
January 6, 2002 |
Michael Borkow |
Ken Kwapis |
308 |
49 |
| Hal gets competitive with Abe in poker; Lois gets carried away with her dance lessons; Francis is trapped in an Alaskan blizzard. |
| "Reese's Job" |
January 20, 2002 |
Neil Thompson |
Todd Holland |
309 |
50 |
| Reese gets a job at a fast-food joint; the newest Krelboyne rivals Malcolm's intellect; Hal and Lois try to sabotage Dewey's attempts to get a new dog. |
| "Lois' Makeover" |
January 27, 2002 |
Michael Glouberman |
Jeffrey Melman |
310 |
51 |
| At Lucky Aide, secret shoppers make their performance reviews. Lois finds out that she performs poorly in appearances and is forced to dress up her appearance. Hal is re-energized after beating the boys at basketball; a rat infestation gives Francis a new job. |
| "Company Picnic (1)" |
February 3, 2002 |
Alan J. Higgins |
Todd Holland |
311 |
52 |
| The family attends Hal's company picnic. Hal tries to avoid his new boss because of his bleak history of first impressions and Malcolm sees an old crush; Guest Appearances include:
|
| "Company Picnic (2)" |
February 3, 2002 |
Alan J. Higgins |
Todd Holland |
312 |
53 |
| The conclusion to the first part of the episode. Reese & his scavenger hunt partner wreak havoc, Hal confronts his boss and Malcolm gets himself into a very awkward position.
Guest Appearances include (along with guests from Company Picnic (1):
|
| "Reese Drives" |
February 10, 2002 |
Michael Glouberman |
Jeffrey Melman |
313 |
54 |
Reese gets a Learner's Permit and promptly commandeers a driving-school vehicle.
Note: When Reese is going through the course at the school, Canadian punk rock band Sum 41's song In Too Deep can be heard in the background. |
| "Cynthia's Back " |
February 17, 2002 |
Maggie Bandur |
Ken Kwais |
314 |
55 |
| Cynthia returns from Europe and Malcolm discovers that she has a more 'developed' figure. This episode was originally rated TV-14 DL. |
| "Hal's Birthday" |
March 3, 2002 |
Alex Reid |
Levie Issacks |
315 |
56 |
| A birthday surprise - Francis comes home on Hal's birthday with his new wife - Piama (Emy Coligado). |
| "Hal Coaches" |
March 10, 2002 |
Ian Busch |
Jeffrey Melman |
316 |
57 |
| Hal decides to coach Dewey's soccer team and turns the team into a team of monsters. Meanwhile, Malcolm and Reese get a computer from their neighbor and Malcolm gets addicted to The Virts. This episode was originally TV-14 DLV. |
| "Dewey's Dog" |
April 7, 2002 |
Michael Glouberman |
Bob Stevens |
317 |
58 |
| Dewey finds a dog and uses him to his advantage - to gain the upper hand over Malcolm and Reese making them wear dresses and makeup. On their anniversary, Hal and Lois try to make the best of it, with nothing that could ruin it except the flu. |
| "Poker 2" |
April 21, 2002 |
Bill Hooper |
Jeffrey Melman |
318 |
59 |
| Hal & Abe, along with their friends, play extremely well in poker; Malcolm, Stevie, and Reese are forced to spend the night with 2 popular girls (Dana Davis and Lindsey Haun); Reese plays matchmaker as he tells the girls that Stevie has a terminal illness; Malcolm discovers one of the girls has an automatic handgun, and tries to hide it from her, with unintentional results. This episode was originally rated TV-14 DLSV, and was roughly edited for syndication on Nick at Nite, ending up with a TV-14 DV rating. |
| "Clip Show" |
April 28, 2002 |
Michael Borkow |
Jaime Babbit |
319 |
60 |
| The boys recall their antics [by way of cold openers] with a psychiatrist (Andy Richter). |
| "Jury Duty" |
May 1, 2002 |
Pang-Ni Landrum |
Ken Kwapis |
320 |
61 |
| Lois goes to jury duty. Malcolm & Reese see Kitty naked over the weekend and can't help bragging about it while they, along with Dewey and Stevie, spend the day exploring a sewer. Hal and Abe think that the case Lois is on is the Reyes case, and spend the day proving their own theories on who's the guilty party. Francis and the other guys are trapped in an ice fishing shed with a bear outside. |
| "Cliques" |
May 5, 2002 |
Michael Borkow |
Jeffrey Melman |
321 |
62 |
| The Krelboynes are forced to join the general school population. |
| "Monkey" |
May 12, 2002 |
Dan Kopelman |
Ken Kwapis |
322 |
63 |
| After knocking out a burglar, Reese turns to law enforcement. A capuchin monkey gives Craig a tough time back at home. Francis is fired because there are no more trees to cut down. |
| Title |
Original Airdate |
Writer(s) |
Director |
Production # |
Episode # |
| "Zoo" |
November 3, 2002 |
Michael Glouberman |
Todd Holland |
401 |
64 |
| Malcolm is depressed, and the family goes to the zoo. Reese battles a goat, while Malcolm & Dewey end up in a tiger pit. Francis meets Otto & Gretchen and takes a job at their dude ranch. Lois' ex-boyfriend (Tim DeKay) puts a tarantula on Hal. |
| "Humilithon" |
November 10, 2002 |
Michael Borkow |
Jeffrey Melman |
402 |
65 |
| Malcolm's first day of high school gets off to a bad start being embarrassed by his mom in front of the entire school, but Cynthia manages to save his new reputation and possibly his life by telling him that she would never have sex with him again if he crashed his dads car into his moms, even though they had never had sex. |
| "Family Reunion" |
November 17, 2002 |
Alex Reid |
Ken Kwapis |
403 |
66 |
| The family goes to Hal's family reunion, where his family makes Lois miserable. Christopher Lloyd guest stars as Hal's father. |
| "Stupid Girl" |
November 24, 2002 |
Dan Kopelman |
Todd Holland |
404 |
67 |
| Malcolm pretends to be stupid so he can win over a cute girl who really is stupid. Meanwhile, Hal rents a steamroller and becomes addicted to running over various objects. |
| "Forwards Backwards" |
December 1, 2002 |
Maggie Bandur |
Levie Issacks |
405 |
68 |
| Days before Malcolm's birthday, he and Reese pull increasingly severe pranks against each other. Flashbacks throughout the episode gradually reveal how their feud began and reached this point. Meanwhile, Francis encounters a "devil cow" at the ranch, Dewey worries about his role as Abraham Lincoln in the school play, and Hal runs into trouble finding a birthday present for Malcolm. |
| "Forbidden Girlfriend" |
December 15, 2002 |
Matthew Carlson |
Jamime Babbit |
406 |
69 |
| While Malcolm begins dating a girl named Nikki (Reagan Dale Neis) whose father, a Vietnam vet, hates him, Dewey discovers he's an 'evil twin' and Francis mediates a dispute between Otto and his cowboy neighbors. |
| "Malcolm Holds His Tongue" |
January 5, 2003 |
Gary Mrphy |
Jeffrey Melman |
407 |
70 |
| Malcolm decides to keep his opinions to himself and ends up getting a stomach ulcer. Meanwhile, Reese goes on a date with his girlfriend... and Hal tries race-walking. |
| "Boys at Ranch" |
January 12, 2003 |
Neil Thompson |
David D'Ovidio |
408 |
71 |
| The boys & Hal visit the ranch. Francis shocks the boys by being mature, while Otto & Hal get drunk and stranded in the desert. |
| "Grandma Sues" |
February 2, 2003 |
Michael Glouberman |
James Simons |
409 |
72 |
| After Reese didn't clear up the leaves like he was supposed to have, Grandma Ida slips on one of them and becomes injured. She then sues her daughter Lois and her son-in-law Hal for it. Meanwhile, Lois discovers that she is pregnant. |
| "If Boys Were Girls" |
February 9, 2003 |
Nahnatchaka Khan |
Ken Kapis |
410 |
73 |
| In this "what-if" story, Lois imagines her life if her four rowdy sons were daughters—and discovers that it's not an improvement. Meanwhile Hal is searching for a Valentine's Day gift for Lois. |
| "Long Drive" |
March 2, 2003 |
Michael Borkow |
Levie Issacks |
411 |
74 |
| Reese ends up in prison for a day. Lois drives Malcolm with her and tells him everything about sex. Dewey causes a feud in Hal's six-man band. Francis accidentally blows up Otto's favorite cow. This episode was originally rated TV-14 DL. |
| "Kicked Out" |
March 9, 2003 |
Alex Reid |
Jeffrey Melman |
412 |
75 |
| A combination of Malcolm's disgust as the house around them is falling apart, and Hal's fear-induced, "zero tolerance" attempts at maintaining peace and order in the family, results in Malcolm being kicked out of the house. |
| "Stereo Store" |
March 16, 2003 |
Matthew Carlson |
Bryan Cranston |
413 |
76 |
Hal gets a second job at "U-Buy It". Meanwhile, a freaky girl from Malcolm's school named Jessica (Hayden Panettiere) babysits Malcolm, Reese, and Dewey.
NOTE: This marks Bryan Cranston's Malcolm directorial debut.
|
| "Hal's Friend" |
March 30, 2003 |
Dan Kopelman |
Jeffrey Melman |
414 |
77 |
| Hal meets up with a friend (Joel Murray), who turns out to be the same type of guy he was when they last met. Dabney gets a paintball gun for his birthday, but his mom won't let him use it because it's "violent". Malcolm tries to make Dabney stand up for himself. |
| "Garage Sale" |
April 6, 2003 |
Miggie Bandur |
Levie Issacks |
415 |
78 |
| Returning home from a visit with Susan, who blabbed about how Lois was hopeless, Lois thinks that she should cut Reese some slack and lets him be in charge of the family garage sale - with disastrous results. Meanwhile, Hal finds his old pirate radio transmitter and restarts the station he ran in college under the pseudonym Kid Charlemagne, and Francis helps Otto deal with his estrangement from his son Rutger. |
| "Academic Octathlon" |
April 13, 2003 |
Rob Hanning |
Todd Holland |
416 |
79 |
| Herkabe forces Malcolm to join the academic octathlon team. When Herkabe decides for them to cheat, Malcolm chooses to make everyone pay. |
| "Clip Show 2" |
April 20, 2003 |
Maggie Bandur |
Levie Issacks |
417 |
80 |
In this second clip show, Hal and Lois are penning their will, and think back to all the trouble their sons put them through.
Note: When Reese is going through the course at the school, Canadian punk rock band Sum 41's song In Too Deep can be heard in the background (also heard in the Season 3 episode Reese Drives) |
| "Reese's Party" |
April 27, 2003 |
Andy Bobrow |
Levie Issacks |
418 |
71 |
| Lois & Hal are out of the house and Reese decides to throw a party. All is fine, until a gang of hoodlums turn the party into a meth operation that even Francis can't handle. |
| "Future Malcolm" |
May 4, 2003 |
Michael Glouberman |
Ken Kwapis |
419 |
82 |
| While at the park, Malcolm meets a depressed, middle-aged man (played by Jason Alexander from Seinfeld) who may be Malcolm's future self. |
| "Baby (1)" |
May 11, 2003 |
Rob Hanning |
James Simons |
420 |
83 |
| The boys & Hal go to a bridal convention. Ida makes an unwelcome visit, and right near the end of the episode, Lois goes into labor. |
| "Baby (2)" |
May 18, 2003 |
Michael Borkow |
Jamie Babbit |
421 |
84 |
| Hal keeps having delusional dreams at the hospital while Lois is in labor. Because no doctors show up at Lois' house to deliver the baby, Francis must take out the baby. Meanwhile, the boys take parenting classes to become better brothers to their next sibling. |
| "Day Care" |
May 18, 2003 |
Gary Murphy |
Steve Love |
422 |
85 |
| A church-run day care center accepts Lois' wailing newborn but in return Reese and Dewey must attend Bible-study classes. |
| Title |
Original Airdate |
Writer(s) |
Director |
Production # |
Episode # |
| "Vegas" |
November 2, 2003 |
Michael Glouberman |
Bryan Cranston |
501 |
86 |
| Francis neglects his work, and winds up trappped in a well (that he didn't fix) with Otto, while a fire erupts in the barn (which again is Francis' fault). The family travels to Las Vegas. Reese and Dewey show an obese rabbit at a competition. Hal has a prophetic dream of winning at a slot machine. Lois goes backstage with her favorite singer (David Cassidy). |
| "Watching the Baby" |
November 9, 2003 |
Alex Reid |
Levie Issacks |
502 |
87 |
| Hot, popular girls want to be seen with Reese, Malcolm and Stevie as revenge on their boyfriends. However, they have to stay home to take care of Jamie. Dewey, stuck at home with Jamie, tells him an elaborate story in which their parents are secretly wealthy, and have a hidden "secret good house" in their closet. Hal wants to buy diapers for Jamie but can't pay for them, so he has to work for Craig at the Lucky Aide. He and the other employees end up starting a revolution to overthrow Craig. |
| "Goodbye Kitty" |
November 16, 2003 |
Neil Thompson |
James Simons |
503 |
88 |
| Stevie finds out his mother Kitty has divorced his dad. Lois' high school diary falls into Reese's backpack; Reese reads it and becomes infatuated with the original owner. Dewey wishes to regress into wanting to be a baby again. Meanwhile, Francis and Otto must put a horse to rest but neither of them has the guts to do it. |
| "Thanksgiving" |
November 23, 2003 |
Matthew Carlson |
David D'Ovidio |
504 |
89 |
| Reese displays monomania and culinary genius while making Thanksgiving dinner. Francis and Piama get into a fight and nearly divorce until Lois steps in. Malcolm goes out to a party, where he spends half the time trying to figure out if a girl named Kirstin (Alessandra Torresani) is flirting with him. They get drunk and almost have sex, Malcolm runs home and tells Francis that he is a coward, until Francis gives him some good advice. This episode was rated TV-14 DLS. |
| "Malcolm Films Reese" |
November 30, 2003 |
Dan Kopelman |
Levie Issacks |
505 |
90 |
| Malcolm films Reese for a school psychology assignment, but later finds out that he is an unwitting participant in one of Mr. Herkabe's experiments. Top officials at Hal's company are arrested for embezzlement, Francis helps Otto deal with a scathing review of the Grotto, and Dewey skips school in favor of earning money as a street performer. |
| "Malcolm's Job" |
December 7, 2003 |
Maggie Bandur |
Steve Welch |
506 |
91 |
| Reese and Malcolm get jobs at a slaughterhouse and the Lucky Aide, respectively. Malcolm catches Lois smoking at work. Hal takes a class to spend more time with Jamie, but he and the other dads are so bored that they bet on their babies (for example, the biggest burp or the fullest diaper). Dewey wants brothering from Francis, and runs away to the Grotto. |
| "Christmas Trees" |
December 14, 2003 |
Alex Reid |
Steve Love |
507 |
92 |
| Hal, Reese, Malcolm, and Dewey go into business selling Christmas trees. Craig is bitten by a squirrel. Otto's family visits the ranch. |
| "Block Party" |
January 4, 2004 |
Rob Ulin |
Levie Issacks |
508 |
93 |
| The family come back early from their yearly vacation to find that their neighbors have been holding an annual block party to celebrate their absence. Reese and Dewey cook up a plan to make quick cash by letting kids beat up Reese, Hal and Lois get into a kielbasa-eating contest, and Malcolm inadvertently aids a burglar. Meanwhile, Francis finds himself assigned to the most disgusting job at the ranch. |
| "Dirty Magazine" |
January 11, 2004 |
Eric Kaplan |
Bryan Cranston |
509 |
94 |
| Malcolm is a part of the school newsletter team. When a student appears with a brilliant story, Malcolm decides to publish it despite the graphic and adult nature it displays, leaving Principal Block (Kurtwood Smith) to cancel all extracurricular activities rather than "turning their high school into an adult bookstore". This episode was rated TV-14 D. |
| "Hot Tub" |
January 25, 2004 |
Andy Bobrow |
James Simons |
510 |
95 |
| Hal buys a hot tub without telling Lois, but it turns into a swamp when he forgets to keep it clean. Malcolm gets his learner's permit while Reese steals Dewey's new friend Noah. Gretchen's former fiance who is also Otto's best friend comes to the ranch. |
| "Ida's Boyfriend" |
February 8, 2004 |
Nel Thompson |
Peter Lauer |
511 |
96 |
| Ida plans to drug a Chinese man (James Hong) into marrying her and take all of his money. Malcolm gets his tongue pierced, while Dewey pretends that Reese is non-existent (making Reese worried) after Reese smashes Dewey's model ship. |
| "Softball" |
February 15, 2004 |
Michael Glouberman |
Ken Kwapis |
512 |
97 |
| Malcolm joins the Lucky Aide softball team in an attempt to get away from Lois, only to discover that she is the coach. Francis drives cross-country to prove to Lois that he is not lazy, while Dewey dares Reese to outdo one of Francis' old stunts. |
| "Lois' Sister" |
February 22, 2004 |
Gary Murphy |
David O'Dividio |
513 |
98 |
| Lois' sister (Laurie Metcalf) visits and Lois learns she needs a new kidney. |
| "Malcolm Dates a Family" |
March 14, 2004 |
Rob Ulin |
Steve Welch |
514 |
99 |
| Lois boycotts Luigi's (the family's favorite restaurant), while Malcolm dates an intellectual family's daughter (Sara Paxton), and gets involved with the family in the process. |
| "Reese's Apartment" |
March 21, 2004 |
Dan Kopleman |
David Grossman |
515 |
100 |
| Reese moves into his own apartment (after playing an unknown prank involving cats and county-wide evacuation) and gets his own credit card. |
| "Malcolm Visits College" |
March 28, 2004 |
David Wright |
Peter Lauer |
516 |
101 |
| Malcolm looks forward to visiting college, but it becomes a nightmare when Lois comes along and they meet the dorm head, Leland. Dewey steals items around the house to drive Hal nuts and to build a piano. Reese pretends to be a drug dealer to go out with the school's narc. Francis and Otto take care of a day care, with disastrous results. This episode was rated TV-14. |
| "Polly in the Middle" |
April 25, 2004 |
Matt Carson |
Steve Love |
517 |
102 |
| Polly the babysitter (Julie Hagerty) is caught in a love triangle between Abe & Craig after Lois and Hal unknowingly set them up on dates. |
| "Dewey's Special Class" |
May 2, 2004 |
Alex Reid |
Bryan Cranston |
518 |
103 |
| Malcolm coaches Dewey on how to do poorly on an IQ test so he will not end up in the Krelboyne class; the trick works too well and Dewey is sent to the emotionally disturbed "Busey" class instead. Meanwhile, Reese tries to figure out what type of genius he is, and Hal and Craig enter a Dance Dance Revolution-style contest. |
| "Experiment" |
May 2, 2004 |
Maggie Bandur |
David O'Odivio |
519 |
104 |
| Stevie & Malcolm try to figure out how Reese managed to separate two bases. Dewey sells chocolate bars by fibbing with Francis' help. Meanwhile, a pig that keeps being beat up by bigger pigs is trained by Francis to become more assertive. This results in chaos. |
| "Victor's Other Family" |
May 9, 2004 |
Eric Kaplan |
David Grossman |
520 |
105 |
| Lois, Reese, and Malcolm go to Canada to meet Victor's secret family. Dewey dreads Hal running with him since bad things always happen before such events between the two. Betty White guest stars as Victor's other wife. |
| Reese Joins the Army (1) |
May 16, 2004 |
Andy Bobrow |
Steve Love |
521 |
106 |
| Reese runs away. Hal's company goes under à la Enron. |
| "Reese Joins the Army (2)" |
May 23, 2004 |
Andrew Orienstein |
Peter Lauer |
522 |
107 |
| The company uses Hal as a scapegoat, while Reese becomes a top-class soldier and makes his way with his squad into Afghanistan. |
| Title |
Original Airdate |
Production # |
Episode # |
| "Reese Comes Home" |
November 7, 2004 |
601 |
108 |
| When Reese realizes the Army is too much for him to handle, he deserts and dresses as an Afghani woman. But Lois is on a march to find him, and travels to Kabul to hunt him down. Meanwhile, Malcolm volunteers at a veterans hospital as a way to make up for his guilt of making Reese leave. |
| "Buseys Run Away" |
November 14, 2004 |
602 |
109 |
| After learning that Dewey will be leaving their class, the Buseys run away and hide in trees, forcing Dewey to look after their needs. Unemployed Hal becomes the leader of a group of dimwitted body builders. |
| "Standee" |
November 21, 2004 |
603 |
110 |
| When Hal and the garbageman get into a trash-dumping war (which benefits Dewey more than anyone else), Hal enlists Reese's help. Meanwhile, Lois gets her job back at Lucky Aide (off probation), and fights against Malcolm in order to take down an offensive store display of a smiling black janitor (whose nametag reads "Slappy") holding a mop and a 6-pack of malt liquor. Soon it's an all-out war between mom and son - until Lois encounters a fellow employee who offends her even more than the display does. |
| "Pearl Harbor" |
December 5, 2004 |
604 |
111 |
| Malcolm and Reese's teenage neighbor has tricked each of them into believing the other is gay. Meanwhile, Hal, tired of competing with a neighbor who always outdoes his Christmas decorations, decides to create his own "holiday" to decorate his house for - Pearl Harbor Day. |
| "Kitty's Back" |
December 12, 2004 |
605 |
112 |
| Kitty (Merrin Dungey) returns after having done everything imaginable and wants to return to her family, to Lois's dismay. Francis comes home and puts Dewey through the torturous "Brotherhood Initiation," Malcolm helps Stevie write an acceptance speech for his etiquette award, and Reese gets a full-body sunburn so he can peel his entire body at once. |
| "Hal's Christmas Gift" |
December 19, 2004 |
606 |
113 |
| Hal and Lois, strapped for cash, decide that Christmas gifts will have to be homemade this year. When everyone makes much better gifts than Hal, he spins a bigger and bigger lie about the present he has in store for them. In desperation, Hal pick-pockets Malcolm's secret credit card, and buys the family a ski vacation. Francis gets fired from the ranch. |
| "Hal Sleepwalks" |
January 16, 2005 |
607 |
114 |
| Hal gets so stressed out over finding a 20th anniversary present for Lois that he starts losing sleep, which prompts Reese to try and brainwash his semiconscious father late at night. A school bully nominates two of Dewey's classmates for student body president, sparking a bizarre three-way election battle. Malcolm takes up the electric guitar despite Lois' warnings that he will fail at it, and writes a song to the tune of the Meow Mix jingle without realizing it. |
| "Lois Battles Jamie" |
January 23, 2005 |
608 |
115 |
| Lois begins to think she is losing her touch when Jamie seems too much for her to handle. When Hal realizes that Lois is losing her confidence, he brings Francis home in order for him to explain to Lois how was she able to have confidence as a mother. Meanwhile, the other boys bring home a diving board and Reese tries to think up the craziest possible stunt to pull with it. |
| "Malcolm's Car" |
January 30, 2005 |
609 |
116 |
| When Malcolm spots a decrepit 1967 Plymouth Barracuda in his neighborhood, he instantly falls in love with it and purchases the car. But he gets so caught up in the difficult task of restoring it that he blows off Stevie as well as Reese who needs him for an illegal betting scheme of his. Hal, on the other hand, is having success when he stumbles upon his hidden talent—hairstyling. Lois doesn't have time to worry about Malcolm or Hal, as she is caught up in scandal between Craig and their Lucky Aide boss Fred. Craig says he is taking time off to tutor Fred's wife in golf but Lois finds out he is actually having an affair with her. |
| "Billboard" |
February 13, 2005 |
610 |
117 |
| When Lois catches the boys vandalizing a trashy billboard for a strip club, Malcolm alters the vandalism into a women's rights protest, which sparks a colossal media circus. In no time, feminists, conservative religious groups and national new reporters descend on the scene. After Hal grants a TV interview, a woman from his past turns up at the faux protest; and Reese, inspired by the giant billboard stripper who comes to life in his dreams, gives an impassioned speech about the objectification of women. |
| "Dewey's Opera" |
February 20, 2005 |
611 |
118 |
| When Lois buys a brand-new king-sized bed, Hal thinks that her motive is to put more distance between them and refuses to sleep in it. Moved to tears by an opera he sees on television, Dewey is inspired to write his own operatic masterpiece, "The Marriage Bed," which is based on his parents' fight and turned into a school production. Meanwhile, Malcolm and Reese build their own street luge board and Malcolm gets into a feud with a mystery rider who keeps forcing him off the road. |
| "Living Will" |
March 6, 2005 |
612 |
119 |
| Hal is named executor of his neighbor's living will and must decide whether to keep him on life support or pull the plug. In attempting to make the decision, Hal discovers he is incapable of making decisions on his own because he always defers to Lois. Meanwhile, Craig asks Malcolm, Reese and Dewey to teach him how to fight dirty since a bully from his childhood is coming to town. |
| "Tiki Lounge" |
March 13, 2005 |
613 |
120 |
| When Hal and Lois realize how little time they spend together, Hal turns the garage into a private tiki lounge where he and Lois can retreat. Things go smoothly until they feud over philosophical beliefs. Meanwhile, Mr. Herkabe cons Malcolm into joining the Booster Club, where he learns a lesson about taking one for the team. |
| "Ida Loses a Leg" |
March 20, 2005 |
614 |
121 |
| During Grandma Ida's unwelcome visit with the family, she loses her leg while saving Dewey from a moving truck. Consumed with guilt, Dewey is determined to find Ida's leg and give it the proper burial. Francis, on the other hand, begrudgingly becomes the caretaker for his stubborn, cranky grandmother. Meanwhile, Malcolm and Reese get a new idea for a prank that forces them to stay awake for days on end to avoid the embarrassment of having their faces glued to the floor. |
| "Chad's Sleepover" |
March 27, 2005 |
615 |
122 |
| After Hal forbids Dewey from inviting his peculiar classmate Chad over for a sleepover, Dewey quickly finds out that his father had good reason to warn him. Meanwhile, Malcolm and Reese find out that they are not as popular as they once thought, then plot "revenge" on their classmates, as Lois searches for the warranty papers on her 10-year-old blender. |
| "No Motorcycles" |
April 3, 2005 |
616 |
123 |
| When Francis and Piama choose to celebrate Francis' 21st birthday at the house, Hal is reminded of a promise he made to his son as a young child, involving a motorcycle trip that Lois quickly forbids. Hal and Francis have no choice but to sneak off for their wild adventure, leaving their women behind. Meanwhile Malcolm, Dewey and Reese are held captive in their own home by a bully. |
| "Butterflies" |
April 10, 2005 |
617 |
124 |
| Malcolm discovers a man, Norm, living in the Lucky Aide. He agrees to keep Norm's secret as long as he provides Malcolm with tidbits on his new crush, a fellow Lucky Aide employee. Meanwhile, when Reese takes a job as an exterminator, he quickly learns that to drum up business he must infest the neighbors' lawns with caterpillars. But instead of spreading the pests, he has a change of heart and begins to nurture them, only to be overwhelmed when they turn into butterflies and swarm on him. |
| "Ida's Dance" |
April 17, 2005 |
618 |
125 |
| Lois goes over to visit Ida, but gets unpleasantly surprised by the St. Grotus Day festival. Malcolm fails a music appreciation course, and reluctantly goes to Dewey for help. Reese and Hal secretly watch scary movies while Lois is not around, but it ends up revealing some unexpected secrets about both Reese and Hal. |
| "Motivational Speaker" |
April 24, 2005 |
619 |
126 |
| Reese begins hanging out with a pack of dogs, and in the end, the police catches him doing the most unbelievable thing. Dewey gets in trouble with Lois, after Lois finds out that he is seeing another mom, and Hal accidentally becomes a motivational speaker with his co-workers, but drops it when he motivates a man into taking over his job. |
| "Stilts" |
May 1, 2005 |
620 |
127 |
| After Lois and Hal are reminded of the tight budget they must uphold, Hal discovers one of his boys has been dialing a 900 number. His attempt to explain the error to the hotline's billing department turns awry when he forgets to hang up the phone, incurring a whopping $800 charge. Meanwhile, Reese takes a job at a research clinic that pays him to pop experimental pills, and a reluctant Malcolm takes on a mortifying job at the Lucky Aide as a costumed Uncle Sam on stilts. |
| "Buseys Take a Hostage" |
May 8, 2005 |
621 |
128 |
| When Hal decides to attend his first annual Neighborhood Association meeting with Malcolm, he is strongly encouraged to take on the role of President. Being his dad's right-hand man, Malcolm sees a perfect opportunity to add some excitement to the community, while Hal's agenda is a little bit different. Meanwhile, Francis takes on a new job as a camp activities coordinator and turns to Dewey for his input on some creative new games. While Dewey revels in his afternoon of fun, his fed-up classmates take their teacher, principal and janitor hostage. Guest Star: Jenette McCurdy |
| "Mrs. Tri-County" |
May 15, 2005 |
622 |
129 |
| Unbeknownst to Lois, the boys enter her in the Mrs. Tri-County Pageant as a joke. When they overhear the other contestants remarking that Lois doesn't have a chance of winning, they plot to help their mother take the crown. Meanwhile, Malcolm is blackmailed into delivering love notes to a contestant for Herkabe, and Reese discovers that, according to the Mrs. Tri-County Pageant manual's scientific formula, he is beautiful. |
| Title |
Original Airdate |
Production # |
Episode # |
| "Burning Man" |
September 30, 2005 |
701 |
130 |
| Malcolm and Reese's attempt to hitch their way to the annual Burning Man festival, which ends Malcolm up with a woman 'almost' as old as his mom, turns into a family vacation when Hal and Lois get in on it. Meanwhile, Dewey does all the chores. This episode was originally rated TV-14 DLSV. |
| "Health Insurance" |
October 7, 2005 |
702 |
131 |
| Hal finds out that the family has been without health insurance for six months and tries to safeguard the house until Monday (when the insurance is put back into effect). Meanwhile, Lois tries to fish out a snitch at the Lucky Aide. |
| "Reese vs Stevie" |
October 21, 2005 |
703 |
132 |
| An angry Reese threatens Stevie, who dreads a retaliation; Dewey gets hooked on cigarettes, thanks to ex-smoker Hal's many stashes around the house. Lois tries to get little Jamie to talk by telling him her modern life and her high school years. Jamie's first words are "Shut Up" in response to his mother's non-stop yammering. This episode was originally rated TV-14 DLV. |
| "Halloween" |
October 28, 2005 |
704 |
133 |
| Hal freaks out when Malcolm gives him the details of a grisly mass murder that occurred in the house years ago. Lois gets stuck working on Halloween and catches a shoplifter as everyone else at Lucky Aide throws a wild party. Reese and Dewey lose track of Jamie as they flee from an old man after egging his house, while Lois gets arrested for kidnapping when she picks up the wrong child. |
| "Jessica Stays Over" |
November 4, 2005 |
705 |
134 |
| Jessica moves in on a temporary basis and teaches Malcolm how to manipulate others, but when he uses her tricks on Lois he feels something he has never felt before, empathy. Meanwhile, after he harvests some fresh honey, Hal fights back against a bee who is out for revenge for killing the rest of his hive. Reese attempts to mail himself to China in a crate and Dewey has him convinced that he has been in there for months. |
| "Secret Boyfriend" |
November 11, 2005 |
706 |
135 |
| Malcolm's in love with a hot and secretly brainy teen named Vicki (Sarah Wright) who fears ruining her image by seeing him publicly. Reese is kicked out of the house for refusing to get a job. |
| "Blackout" |
November 18, 2005 |
707 |
136 |
| A power outage disrupts Lois and Hal's anniversary and reveals Malcolm's trysts with young European women. This episode was originally rated TV-14 DLSV. |
| "Army Buddy" |
December 2, 2005 |
708 |
137 |
| Reese's old army buddy, Abby (Larisa Oleynik) visits and she has feelings for lois. This episode was originally rated TV-14 DS |
| "Malcolm Defends Reese" |
December 16, 2005 |
709 |
138 |
| Malcolm and Reese end up in the same class since Reese failed the previous year. Mr. Herkabe, who may lose his award for the school's highest GPA to Malcolm, gleefully humiliates Reese every day until Malcolm agrees to start failing his classes. Meanwhile, Jamie's new babysitter drives Lois crazy with her nonstop talking. |
| "Malcolm's Money" |
January 6, 2006 |
710 |
139 |
| Malcolm begins to fuss about his high school yearbook photo. Malcolm receives a $10,000 education reward and when Hal and Lois find out, they want to spend it on themselves. |
| "Bride of Ida (1)" |
January 13, 2006 |
711 |
140 |
| Dewey, Lois and Hal go out of town to a piano competition. Without Lois around, Grandma Ida makes Reese get married to Ida's helper, Raduca (Rheagan Wallace), but only if he defeats Malcolm in three challenges. When Lois, Dewey and Hal return, they find out that Reese has run with Raduca to Las Vegas to get hitched, much to Ida's dismay. |
| "College Recruiters (2)" |
January 29, 2006 |
712 |
141 |
| A broke Francis gets talked into getting a real job by Dewey. Back home, Hal takes over the college recruiters, which Malcolm refuses to meet with, and treats each one as a suitor. However, Hal's plans are ruined when Malcolm chooses to go to Harvard. Reese and Raduca's marriage ends when Lois and Reese catch Raduca cheating with her other lover, Bela. |
| "Mono" |
February 12, 2006 |
713 |
142 |
| Lois discovers she has mono after a visit to the doctor. She then ends up giving it to Malcolm after her maternal instincts begin. As a result, both Lois and Malcolm are forced to spend two weeks together in the same room. Meanwhile, Hal is invited to all of his neighbors' parties after they know Lois will not be attending any of them. Dewey makes Jamie his slave. |
| "Hal Grieves" |
February 19, 2006 |
714 |
143 |
| Hal gets a devastating phone call that his father has died, but because he never knew his father well he doesn't shed a tear. In an attempt to overcompensate with his kids, Hal takes the boys shopping, lets them miss school and offers to buy Malcolm a new car until Lois steps in. Hal's buddy Abe thinks that a phone call from a cast member of Star Trek: The Original Series will cheer him up. |
| "A.A." |
March 5, 2006 |
715 |
144 |
| Lois and Hal visit Francis to help him celebrate one year of sobriety, but when they attend his A.A. meeting, they find out that Lois was the one who drove him to drink. Meanwhile, Dewey finds the spare key to Hal's car, but when Malcolm and Reese refuse to drive him to the arcade, it takes them more than 12 steps to find it. |
| "Lois Strikes Back" |
March 19, 2006 |
716 |
145 |
| When four popular high school girls play an evil prank on Reese by pretending he has a secret admirer and then dropping a pig off at his front door, Lois comes to his rescue with a series of destructive pranks. |
| "Hal's Dentist" |
March 26, 2006 |
717 |
146 |
| Hal's friend Trey tells him to come to his dental office when he loses a tooth during a poker game, but their friendship goes into jeopardy when Hal's faced with a $2,000 bill and causes a fight between them. Meanwhile, Reese teaches Lois how to ride a bike. Malcolm and Dewey find sleeping as their new favorite pastime after finding a new mattress. |
| "Bomb Shelter" |
April 2, 2006 |
718 |
147 |
| Malcolm joins a local dance class to impress a girl, but when she loses her footing in rehearsal, he realizes that he needs a more talented partner in order to win the competition. Reese and Dewey discover an underground bomb shelter in the backyard and lock Hal in it, while Lois tries to win a new truck at the shopping mall. |
| "Stevie in the Hospital" |
April 9, 2006 |
719 |
148 |
| When Stevie goes to the hospital, Malcolm tries making up every excuse he can think of to not go because he can't face the truth about his illness. Meanwhile, Hal gets highly competitive about his new remote control boat, Lois thinks Dewey is trying to drive her insane, and Reese's new job as a telemarketer takes a bizarre turn. |
| "Cattle Court" |
April 16, 2006 |
720 |
149 |
| Reese meets a cute vegetarian named Carrie (Tara Lipinski) when he goes back to work at the meat plant. He goes along with her politics talk at first, but she catches him with a pork chop. So, to get Carrie back, he sets free all the cows at the meat plant. Meanwhile, Malcolm tries to fool Lois in order to attend a rock concert, only to end up making Craig miserable. |
| "Morp" |
April 23, 2006 |
721 |
150 |
| For the senior prom, Reese gets paid to take Janine, a studious girl in class, but only after she gives him a makeover and sends him to finishing school. Malcolm aligns himself with the unpopular kids to form an anti-prom they call "Morp". Dewey discovers there aren't any childhood pictures of him, so he concocts an elaborate scavenger hunt to punish Hal and Lois. |
| "Graduation" |
May 14, 2006 |
722 |
151 |
| In the series finale, Malcolm struggles with his valedictorian speech, Hal finds out that the family may not have enough money to send Malcolm to college, Francis finds the 9 to 5 job of his dreams, Reese tries to be a permanent janitor, and Lois is pregnant yet again. Malcolm discovers that Lois and Hal plan for him to become president. |
