Morning Constitutions

• Artist: Larry the Cable Guy
• Rating:
• Release Date: April 03, 2007
• Genre: Spoken Word

Review

On Morning Constitutions, blue-collar comedian Larry the Cable Guy sets the mood right off the bat with his opening line, "I ain't been this excited since I found a quarter in my poop, I'll tell ya what." His 2007 effort makes up for his sloppy and uninspired appearance on the previous year's Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One for the Road by going back to basics and toning his rebel yell down to where he's not so off-putting, unless you have a low tolerance for grossness, dumb jokes, and even dumber people. Larry's Grandma is suing singer Carrie Underwood because she hit a pole while listening to "Jesus, Take the Wheel," while Larry himself sorts out toddlers from terrorists by checking if the diaper is on the bottom or the top. That's one of the few times racism enters the picture, and "Gay Mafia" features the very politically incorrect "is getting whacked a good or bad thing for them?" Whether or not this is harmless fun can't be argued here, but the delivery is naïve over hateful -- sometimes even knowingly ironic -- and if you're really worried about impressionable minds you've got plenty of filthy thoughts and sleazy innuendos to help write this off completely. Larry isn't proud of everything associated with Middle America, and accuses Wal-Mart of having the motto "You think our prices are low, check out the forehead on that cashier over there." These moments that are more clever than expected appear just as the poop jokes wear out their welcome, then the cycle repeats with catch phrases "Git-R-done!," "Lord, I apologize," and "I don't care who you are, that's funny" used sparingly. The guitar comes out at the end for a couple rambling and fun "songs," including the Johnny Cash-inspired "A Sue Named Boy." Unfortunately, Brokeback Mountain jokes were already dated when the disc was released, and Larry should really realize that the horrors of Hot Pockets is fellow comedian Jim Gaffigan's exclusive territory. It could get him accused of stealing material, and the last thing Larry needs is more detractors. Morning Constitutions won't change the minds of any Larry haters, but it's made for fans, maybe even skillfully crafted for them. As Larry would say, if you don't know Moon Over Hammy is an entrée at Denny's, don't come round here. ~ David Jeffries, All Music Guide

Tracks

Track Title	Composers	Performers	Time
Bowling Shoes	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(5:34)
Just Hitched	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(5:23)
I Like Steak	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(5:14)
Pie of the Month	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(5:10)
Terrorist or Toddler	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(4:04)
Gay Mafia	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(3:56)
Stool Troubles	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(2:38)
Shopping at Wal-Mart	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(5:21)
Bed, Beer & a Blonde	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(2:50)
Squeal or No Squeal	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(2:44)
A Sue Named Boy	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(4:45)
Poop Lasagna	Larry the Cable Guy	Larry the Cable Guy	(6:06)
[CD-ROM Track]		Larry the Cable Guy

Credits

Cindy Rae (Make-Up), Emily McDonnell (Mixing), Dave Higby (Editing), Cindy Rae (Stylist), Kevin Tucker (Art Direction), Brooke Ludwick (Creative Director), Donivan Cowart (Mastering), Kevin Tucker (Package Design), J.P. Williams (Management), J.P. Williams (Producer), Eric May (Photography), Alan C. Blomquist (Producer), Dave Higby (Executive Producer)

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