["'Cuz writing rhymes to me is like Popeye to spinach","And you wanna know why because I'm mother fucking truckin'","Said, this one goes out to my man the groove merchant","I been through many times for which I thought I might lose it","Yo shut the fuck up Chico man","I ride around town in my low-rider bicycle","Man I saw your female with them too, what's up wit her?","The only thing that saved me, has always been music","Ain't even gonna call out your names 'cuz ya' so wack","Do you think it's chocolate milk, but it's watered down yoo hoo","You got, you got, you got, you got, you got","Thought you could walk on me to get some kinda' walk","Man I ain't got nothing to do with those dudes","","Professor, what's another word for pirate treasure?","Trying to figure out what you to do to go for yours","You think you know what you doin' [Incomprehensible]","A dictionary definition of the word spastic","","","'Cuz ya shit'll be stinking when I go for mine","Coming through with beats, for which I been searchin'","Well I think it's booty, booty","My voice sounds sweet 'cuz it hasta","A good mix tape to put you in the right mood","You shoulda' never started something you couldn't finish","Like two sealed copies, of expansions","The logo I sport is the face of the monkey","And one big oaf, who's faker than plastic","","We got our studio, it's under the G, it's no question","'Cuz that's the kind of frame of mind I'm in","Yo I don't hang out with those guys","So many wack MC's, you get that TV bozak","Why I think it's booty? That's what it is","I got supplies of beats, so you don't have to wait","'Cuz I'm the master blaster, drinking up the shasta","","I been hearin' that she's been giving that stuff out to all them graffiti guys","Dancing around like you think your Janet Jackson","So light a match to my ass 'cuz I'm blowin' up","Booty, booty, booty","I'm like Tom Vu with yachts and mansions","With your head phones strapped, ya' rocking rewind pause","But now I want y'all to move it","","I'm bad ass, move ya' fat ass, 'cuz your wack son","Yes, I got more bounce to the fucking bumpin'","","My chrome is shining, just like an icicle","You say shit when I bite, when I write y'all","I'd paint three of those murals for some of that ass","But, like a pencil to a paper I got more to come","I'm in the pocket just like Grady Tate","You got the boomin' system but it's blastin' out doo","A little puffy so you know what I'm doing right","Life's been good to me 'cuz life ain't nothing but a good groove","","","Put your point on the floor and just prove it","So you better take your time, and meditate on your rhyme","So don't touch me, 'cuz I'm electric","Union made, Ben Davis quality, it's no junk see","Like an MC at the fever in the DJ Booth","And that's wrong y'all, over the long haul","I'd like thank you people for just showin' up","You can't cut the mustard when fronting it on, it on","I'll pull a rug out from underneath your ass as I talk on","And if you touch me you'll get shocked","Said I'm smurfin' not rehearsin', getting live y'all","[Incomprehensible]","I got this feelin' and it's back again","I'll take you out like a sniper on a roof","And that's right y'all, don't get uptight y'all","One after another you can all get some"]
Performed by: Beastie Boys Written by: M Caldato; Mike Diamond; Adam Horovitz; M Nishita; Adam Yauch
Credits: Caldato, M (Songwriter); Diamond, Mike (Songwriter); Horovitz, Adam (Songwriter); Nishita, M (Songwriter); Yauch, Adam (Songwriter); BROOKLYN DUST MUSIC (Publisher); POLYGRAM INT'L MUSIC PUBG GROUP (Publisher)
"Professor Booty" is the 18th track on the album Check Your Head by American hip hop group the Beastie Boys, released as a single in 1992. The sample at the start of the song is from the film WildStyle.
MCA vs. MC Serch
This song features MCA delivering a diss rap aimed at MC Serch from 3rd Bass for insulting the Beastie Boys on The Cactus Album. For example:
“
But one big oaf who's faker than plastic
A dictionary definition of the word spastic
You should have never started something
That you couldn't finish
'Cause writin' rhymes to me
Is like Popeye to spinach