Can a person with Asperger's Syndrome get married?
While Asperger's has only recently been 'discovered' the
syndrome has been in existence probably as long as man has been
around. There are probably tens of thousands of people living now
that meet the diagnostic requirements that have no idea that they
are dealing with Asperger's and that is what causes some of their
idiosyncrasies and difficulties.
An aspie certainly can marry. Whether or not he/she wants to
marry may be another question. Asperger's is high functioning
autism the operative word being high. They are not freaks or
weirdo's. Aspies have jobs, degrees, owns homes, drive, pay their
own bills, and volunteer. They are not mentally deficient, and the
law says nothing about banning them from marriage.
Yes, but it can be difficult, since a spouse will normally
expect a certain degree of intimacy and affection. It is important
for the person with AS and their spouse to understand the syndrome.
It is also important for the person with AS to stretch as much as
they can to make their spouse feel loved.
Many people with AS decide that marriage is too much of a burden
because of the above reasons.
I have AS, and marriage can be quite difficult at times, but my
husband understands AS and cuts me some slack, and I try to meet
They can get married. Some co-workers of mine who both have
Asperger's Syndrome were recently married to each other. They
understand the condition and seem to have fewer relationship
difficulties caused by Asperger's Syndrome than marriages I know
between one person with Asperger's Syndrome and one neuro-typical
Many married Aspies, I note, choose to ditch many of the
'standard chapters of the rule-book' on marriage written for mainly
typical marriages. They often radically opt for differences as
far-reaching as where precisely they each live, how often they are
together and at what times, how to allow consciously for
'down-time' or 'processing-time' for the AS partner, how to improve
intimacy and yet limit intensity, how to manage a need for
structure and timing, widely exploring visual and other
communication forms, facilitating-with-care exposure to elements of
spontaneity and unruliness (e.g. teen children from 13yo to adult
children up to 25yo or more), etc.
I am an Aspie and have been married for 19 years, to the first
woman I fell in love with when I was 18.
As many have said, there are absolutely no obstacles to Aspies
marrying. Nor are there necessarily any problems guaranteed to
occur; speaking as an Aspie, I have difficulty with body language
and so on - but am nevertheless in a very comfortable and
affectionate relationship. In other words, the only thing that can
be said to apply to all Aspies is that no two are alike.