Relationships
Emotions

Can a relationship work out with a childhood abused girl who still loves her ex if she abused your relationship so you kicked her out and she shows no regret and hates you because you contacted her ex?

121314

Top Answer
User Avatar
Wiki User
2005-11-21 00:44:00
2005-11-21 00:44:00

Please don't be so hard on this girl. You need to get on the Internet and look up "The cycle of abuse." It's a hard things to get over. Men who abuse women are controlling, weak minded, and at times brutal. They usually start out nice, then control her by getting her away from her family and friends and then asking her to move in with him where he has 100% control. The long and short of it is, her lifestyle will be filled with mental and physical abuse and it's just like brainwashing someone. She knows no other way and is use to being told what to do and say by her abuser. There are high stats where the abused woman goes back to her abuser or will pick other men that have an abusive personality and she just can't help it. Abused women really need therapy to learn the tools to protect themselves against such men. This is a very serious problem and one you shouldn't take lightly. You made a mistake! If you knew what you were doing you would have NEVER mailed her ex. You only caused her more emotional and physical pain. When you contact the abuser (her ex) then you are challenging him and he's too chicken to come after you and will simply beat the hell out of her. 9 chances out of 10 that is what has happened. There are two things that could have happened here. #1 She could have treated you shabbily to protect you and gone back to her abuser or #2 She can't deal with a nice guy (it's like walking on egg shells because she is so use to being treated poorly and can't believe someone would be just nice to her) and has gone back to what she knows best. She has no independence, no self worth and low self esteem. I suggest you either fight for her (not with her abuser) but try talking to her to find out if she really wants to leave her abuser and if so, then you get her to straight to an "Abused Women's Center" for help (they will protect her.) If she is not willing to do this and fights you on the issue then please turn your back, walk away and get on with your life. That means ending your friendship as well. Good luck Marcy Hello Marcey, thanks for your message. Well, I offered her the world and guided her into a normal life, but whatever I did was never good enough. I offered counceling but the only thing she talked with the counceler about was, that I am controlling and the issue with her ex boyfriend who lives in Florida. I felt pressured on an every day base. Her ex was not getting out of her mind and on the top I reminded her of him so much as I am German too. I almost felt she wanted to jeopardize our relationship on purpose in order to go back to him. On the top she had beauty issues with her skin which made her real depressed and agressive. She told me she got aggrevated around me. As a background story about him: He left her once because she did not care about him, but suddenly she woke up felt like she wanted him back. This was a heavy stone in our relationship and bothered me a lot. Of course I complained and asked for a change but as more I complained as more she turned against me. I did not see a way out then contacting her EX in order to get him off our back. I know this was a mistake, but I felt maybe that's the solution for peace. If she can't do it, maybe I can stop it. I found out later is that she was still in contact with him and hiding our relationship in front of him. Now she is gone and she asked me to go on with my life. She wants to pick up some stuff and meet me next week, but I can't get over her. I am even scared to see her now, because I hope that she will wake up. To be honest I want her back, but without the baggage of her ex. Everything could have been fine, if he wouldn't have been in the game. Well, there is one more thing to say. She has 2 kids with another man back in Kentucky which she abandoned for becoming a model/actress in Hollywood. I don't want to see her getting lost in LA. She doesn't see my intentions. She said I can't be her hero, she wants to do it by herself. Trust me I never held her back from anything, the only big issue was always her EX. She said she would have left me anyways because she feels to obligated to me? I don't understand....I have tried to be there, to give me heart, to offer a good life, but everything went bad and very difficult ? What should I do, I still love her. It might sound crazy but I want her back ! I ask for your honest opinion and help !

1
๐Ÿ™
0
๐Ÿคจ
0
๐Ÿ˜ฎ
0
๐Ÿ˜‚
0

Related Questions

User Avatar

. You couldn't (improve on last answer, or have a relationship with a Narcissist without feeling abused).You cannot have a relationship with an abuser without feeling abused.

User Avatar

not very good because his parents abused him when he was younger

User Avatar

he was beat up alot in his childhood

User Avatar

Because they feel like they are the reason all this happen because of them but it really depends on what there childhood was like.

User Avatar

Oprah Winfrey had a successful childhood she was sexually abused by her male cousin but she did not nobody

User Avatar

she was abused by her father

User Avatar

He was abused and his dad was a jerk.

User Avatar

because the parents probably have had a bad childhood with the same problem and abuse a innocent child over it when the did nothing.

User Avatar

most people get abused in a relation ship 99.9% of the worlds population get abused in a relationship

User Avatar

He was raped and abused by his stepfather daily

User Avatar

Horrible. She was sexually abused at age 9.

User Avatar

No she did not. Google search it, you will find that she was abused.

User Avatar

Get help immediately, because no one should go through all that.

User Avatar

A good family relationship is important because it teaches you how you will define relationships when you are older. What you experienced as a child will seem like the "norm" to you as an adult. If you had a loving and happy childhood, you will be likely to have the same relationships as an adult whereas if you were abused as a child you might expect and accept it as an adult. This is not always the case, you are just more at risk for this.

User Avatar

Brutal he was sexually abused by his great grandfather

User Avatar

Well why would you want your ex back if he/she abused you or if you abused them? MOVE ON!

User Avatar

I don't know how many but I think surprisingly a lot. I am getting abused by my boyfriend on an hourly basis let alone on a dailybasis but I can't get out of the relationship because of my circumstances.

User Avatar

its about her childhood and how she watched her mother be abused in a corner, so she watched her halo.

User Avatar

kids will love their abuser because they want to have that relationship with their family - Kay Kay

User Avatar

to tell you the truth, in a relationship women are commonly abused (i mean look at the chris brown and rihanna incodent)

User Avatar

In the United Stated Child Aid should be contacted. In Canada it is Child Welfare.

User Avatar

A most horrible one - abused by his parents, especially his father and stepfather.

User Avatar

because it was based on her childhood and she was abused really badly. she now knows why the caged bird sings! ;)

User Avatar

He is evil maybe because he had a bad childhood. His parents could have been killed. He may have been an orphan or he could have been abused.

User Avatar

Well it depends who you are and how you are abused. I supposed most-noone would like it to be abused because it is not a happy thing. So no being abused i would say 99% of people would not like... have an unhappy childhood, and probably make some bad mistakes in the future. OMG i did not see "sexualy abused" if i were to be sexualy abused i would call the police A>S>A>P sexual abuse is so wrong and it is considered a crime of course so i would hit the person as hard as i could


Copyright ยฉ 2020 Multiply Media, LLC. All Rights Reserved. The material on this site can not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, cached or otherwise used, except with prior written permission of Multiply.