Can your sister as the executor demand things from you or put a monetary value on things you took from your parent's home after their death and do you have any rights?


You certainly do have rights and demand them! You have a right to see the Will. Read the Will carefully and see how the Estate is suppose to be distributated. Example: China/jewelry/pieces of furnishing/heirlooms, etc., are to go (see if the deceased has named a sibling or relative for each piece and if it states that it's to be divided EQUALLY between the two sisters then by law, this is what your sister as Executrix should be doing!) If she doesn't you can seek out a lawyer and she's in big trouble! The Will usually goes to probate first to be sure that all personal and non-personal debts are paid off (meaning: loans, mortgages, income tax, taxes on property, credit card debt, etc.) Your sister DOES NOT have the right to start going through the contents of the Estate! You can go into the house together and take things out of the house to store things either in your own homes or in storage, but that's as far as it goes. Later, when the Probate is finalized is the time you divide those contents and any monies or property that may be in the Will.

Wills are for a reason and by law, must be followed to the letter. Get that copy of the Will and tell your sister if she doesn't knock it off you are seeking legal advice. Try to discuss this matter as calmly as you can, because money and possessions of another are simply not worth losing a sister/brother or friend over. Unfortunately, I have seen some very nice people turn into animals when it comes to a Will. For the most part most people have a little secret corner of their personality that is called "Greed!"

My husband's parents passed away, and his sister who was Executrix went into the house and tried to clean out everything, but I forced my husband to go down to the house to protect his legal rights and those of his brother in New Zealand. I went along for the ride, but found myself in the middle of one nasty hornets nest. I am one that refuses to put up with this sort of behavior so I told her that if she didn't abide by the Probate rules or the Will that we would be seeking legal action and "Contest the Will." As soon as you say these words the other person will automatically back off, because if you contest the Will, it can be held up in court for a very long time, and most people just want what's due them and move on.

Have that talk with your sister and don't take a back seat! Here are the rules:

You have the right to be present when you sister enters any property or removes any items from that property.

You have the right to know where the money is being spent (funeral costs, money out of the Estate accounts to pay for legal counsel or paying for any forms needed to process the Will.)

You have the right to get what was left to you in the Will whether your sister agrees with it or not.


To abide by all wishes in the Will by the deceased

The death notice is put into two different papers. (If you live in New York, then choose the most popular newspaper and if your parent(s) came from another State or town, you can choose a paper in their hometown. It's a way of letting the deceased friends and other family members know and also if there will be a funeral or not.)


To have the Will Probated so that all debts are paid for

To keep a ledger of all expenses such as paying for electricity/heat/cable/phone, etc., until one can decide if they are selling the house/apartment/condo. Also all receipts must be available as to what money is being spent. THE EXECUTRIX CANNOT SPEND MONEY ON THEIR OWN PERSONAL NEEDS AND THIS IS BREAKING THE LAW!

When the Probate is activated, all monies must be accounted for (down to the penny!)