Do narcissists realize how inept they are at maintaining relationships?

Nope, they think they are superior to all, and they think everyone else has the problem

do they see the pain their causing

I'm currently in an abusive marriage of three years and have been to therapy on several occassions and had read so many self-help books which have been wonderful in helping me realize whats happening and that it is no way my fault and trying to understand this sickness they have in order to save myself, and what i have found is that these type of people are very damaged from something that had happened in their lives most likely durning childhood and in most cases don't even understand what they are doing!! the books i read said not to even try to explain how hurt you are over what they do that they will never understand!!! you need to realize that they are sick and this is no way your fault even though they will try their hardest to blame us for everything!!! don't let them crush your spirit, there's nothing wrong with you and don't let his crazy-making convience you otherwise!!!i can tell I'm getting stronger and the next time he moves out (which he has done a dozen times over) I'm changing the locks for good!!! please read some self-help books their great!!! One of my favorites "The Abusive Relationship" by Patricia Evans~

answer

Although they realize they cannot maintain relationships and are somehow "different" than others who can, they still think it is becase of other people's problems and faults, not them.