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How can you talk to your boyfriend to find out something that he doesn't want to tell you?
Wiki User
∙ 8y ago
First, you need to understand that just because someone is your boyfriend, that does not mean you should have access to every detail of his life. He has the right to privacy, and being his girlfriend is not an open pass to pry into all of his business. Just because you want to know something, does not mean that you have the right to, or that you even need to. Sometimes things are painful, personal, or embarrassing. Nobody should be forced into divulging those sort of things if they don't involve you.
If it does not directly involve you, then let it go. If he wants to tell you, he will. If he doesn't, it may just not be your business. Giving him his space is a type of respect, and it shows you care about him as a individual person, not just as an attachment to you.
If it does directly involve you, wait until you are alone. Straight up ask him. If he won't tell you, ask him why he doesn't want to discuss it. Playing head games or trying to be manipulative will just make him clam up even more. He is likely smart enough to see that is what is happening.
Decide how badly you need to know. Think on how much you trust him. Could this be a deal breaker? If so, explain to him that not being open with you about things that directly involve your relationship is causing a trust issue, and that is a problem for you. Just keep in mind that forcing information can damage his trust in you, and if he is up to no good, then he is likely to lie when backed into a corner anyway.
If he still won't tell you, then it is up to you if you can continue on in the relationship without this information or not. If it is that important and being withheld, it might just be time to move on.
Wiki User
∙ 8y ago
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