How come guys get to a point where they are absolutely set in their ways with no changing them and there is nothing you can do about it and yet the woman has to bend who she is to keep him happy?

Answer 1

There is no such thing as "there is nothing I can do about it." There is no excuse for poor behavior from either mate. Until the day we die we are hopefully trying to better our personality. None of us are perfect. If your boyfriend/husband is 40+ he could be in his menopause. Uh huh, men do have a "male menopause!" Although the symptoms are not as severe as women go through, men still can have hot flashes, be moody, and the worst of all, is, they think life has passed them by and they feel they have missed a lot of things in their lives. This can be a dangerous time(women included) because there is more cheating and divorces going on at this age bracket than ever. Some people going through these hormone changes want to experience youth all over again, but the smart ones know you are "only as old as they feel" and if you find someone else the magic will wear off of that relationship (most relationships go through this transition) and you just have another set of problems. The older men and women get the more set in their ways they will be. It's nature. If you are below 40 then it's a "cop out" because youth is never set in their ways, but always full of adventure and trying out new things (some not so great) but nonetheless, they are full of energy and ready for almost anything. If your boyfriend/husband is below 40 sit down and communicate your feelings and if he doesn't listen or try then tell him you aren't wasting the rest of your life putting up with this. If he's over 40 then tell him to go get a physical by his doctor and see if all is OK. Sometimes it can be a thyroid problem or some health problem. Lethargy, not sleeping well, eating too much, losing your appetite, weight gain, weight loss and not sleeping well can be signs of depression. ALL people have at least one bout of depression in their lives either caused by the genetic pool, or a trauma. Also alcohol and drugs are good cause for depression. If your boyfriend/husband is diabetic or on medications this can cause lethargy and, as we all know, most men hate to follow diets which being a diabetic requires. Many medications can cause lethargy, some depression, etc. If he is on any medication look it up on the web and find out what the side effects are. Find out the above info, and then talk to him. If he's not willing to listen be strict about it and tell him if he doesn't try to help himself, then you're leaving. Life is just too short. Good luck Marcy