System of a Down

How do you cool down after a break up?



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Anyone who has ever broken up from someone they love or loved can either be so hurt they are vindictive, angry, grieve or depressed and it's natural. It is like grieving. Grieving for the relationship two people once had when there were no problems between them. Many people are left wondering why they are in such awe that they have split up. You are smart to realize you need to cool down. You have to put the whole situation into perspective. Did the person cheat on you; were they depressed and moody; were they abusive; did they constantly flirt or threaten you with replacing you at any given time. If one of these is true then you need to realize you are very lucky and got out in the nick of time whether it was you that broke off the relationship or your mate. Then it's time to get busy, dust yourself off, get out with friends and have fun and realize you deserve better. Eventually you'll meet someone else (most of us do) and you'll be so glad you made the decision to move on. My first husband cheated on me. We married in our early 20s. All the signs were there, but I was too blinded with 'being in love' and in later years realized I had no idea what real love was all about. My family and friends warned me not to marry him, but I did. 3 1/2 years later after a very stormy abusive relationship I had the courage to leave him, find myself my own apartment, changed jobs and made new friends. I never looked back. I was heartbroken at first, but it didn't take me long to realize just how lucky I was. We had no home, no children and I certainly didn't want a future with this man. I went out with girlfriends, had some great male friends, dated, and eventually was introduced to my second husband by a male friend. We have been married 35 years. When I look back at how hurt my first husband made me and the thought of being alone the rest of my life I realized it was a mistake I made and I had to resolve my own problems. I learned a lot from that relationship and moved on to a healthier relationship. Now I know that I'm strong, fair, and if I'm not treated with the respect I give I'm gone! So far so good!