I am a young gay guy who is naturally very hairy and I was wondering what I should shave and what I should leave alone while meeting most other gay guys expectations for how a man should look?

Why not look for guys who like hairy guys. Why worry about others expectations? As for how a man is supposed to look, in your case, he is supposed to be hairy. Personal preference, I prefer hair to smooth. To my eye, it is more masculine.