If you were to leave your husband than half of all he owns his yours including his Retirement Fund. However, if you remain married it should be a "given" that the money is both yours. My husbands father passed first, the Estate automatically went to my mother-in-law, but when she passed she divided her Estate amongst the 4 siblings. When my husband received his portion it was considered "our money." A year ago my mother passed away (my father predeceased her in 1973) and when I got my inheritance it was also a "given" and I put the money in both our names. Married people should love and trust each other enough to share the money and decide to either pay bills off with it or upgrade their living style or perhaps upgrade the home they are (that's what my husband and I did.) We also put a good sized portion in our Retirement Plan.
In your case I don't understand how you could finish paying of their house and car if no cash was involved. When parents die, their Wills go to Probate, and all debts are paid, such as bank loans, car loans, mortgages, house/property taxes, personal outstanding taxes, etc. I don't understand why you would have to pay the house and car off after their deaths because Probate would comply to government regulations and all debts would be paid out of the assets in the Estate.
The form 'allow your husband and me' is correct. The pronoun 'me' is part of the compound object of the verb 'allow'. Example: If you allow your husband and me a little more time we can finish. Other correct examples are using 'your husband and me' as the object of a preposition: ... for your husband and me ... ... from your husband and me ... ... by your husband and me ... ... near your husband and me ... ... to your husband and me ... An easy way to figure out whether I or ME is correct is to remove "your husband" from the sentence. Try it with just I or ME. You should be able to figure out which one is right. Then, add "your husband" back in. Adding "your husband" does not change whether I or ME is correct. Be aware, that the custom is to list yourself last. You should say: Your husband and I, Your husband and me. You should not say: I and your husband. Me and your husband.
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