In Virginia can a 16-year-old choose which parent they want to live with?
Yes. The court (I'm guessing this is a divorce thing) will
usually honor a sixteen year old's request.
Minors are not allowed to decide with whom the wish to
A judge may speak with the child concerning issues such as the
school they attend, friends, neighborhood, extracurricular
activites and so forth.
Custodial decisions are always based upon what is in the best
interest of the child and not the preference of any of the involved