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2006-08-10 07:08:26
2006-08-10 07:08:26

This will by no means be a complete answer, because I'm not an expert...just have some experience with these folks. Great damage gets done to an N's victim because N's are often very charming and clever, and when a relationship is new they overwhelm you with what you think is true affection and caring. Unless you've experienced their type before, you can't comprehend the possibility that they could be so double-minded. I think that's one of the greatest benefits of this website...people who are reeling from these situations learn that many people have been blindsided by a narcissist's ability to dazzle and charm during the idealization phase. And I understand this phase can go on for quite a while in some cases. Read Sam's book and keep checking back on here. It will help. From Georgette This is basically right, but I wouldn't call it "blind trust" but empathy. A normal person has empathy and will often get sucked into a narcissist's web by feeling sorry for the narcissist. A narcissist has no concept of empathy and will not hesitate to make all kinds of sad claims to get the empathetic normal person to help them. One example I experienced recently was when my narcissistic ex called my phone to leave a message telling me in the same sad tone he always uses about how he needed the name of an old landlord we once rented from. Not receiving a reply, he left a second message prompting me for the name, saying "it was Donna...Donna...something." By trying to sound confused and dangling the half-answer out there, he hoped to hook me into answering the question! He knows I love to answer questions and be helpful, because I am highly empathetic! Again not receiving a reply (I know his tricks), he called again and actually TOLD ME what the name was and her phone number! He claimed to have seen this information in a vision. Yeah right. I doubt he even needed the information at all. He just wanted to talk to me, so he could get his narcissistic supply. The moral is never never never do anything for a narcissist. They don't need your help. They can get hundreds and hundreds of empathetic people to help them who are NOT YOU. So do yourself a favor and ignore the narcissist.


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