Is fatigue or 'paralysis of the will' common with adult ADD?
ADD is exhausting. It affects my work life, my home life, my social life. Plenty of people don't believe it really exists and I hear dyslexic jokes when people make mistakes.
It is definitely fatiguing and I can see how someone could suffer from a paralysis of will. I keep trying to reboot, keep trying to keep up and other people can do things easier and faster.
I would call the fatigue and paralysis depression. But call it what you want. ADD is exhausting.
All I can say is thank goodness for Adderral and exercise. I think that the fatigue that is experience by the ADD/ADHD brain comes from doing anything that has lost it's initial thrill or taking care of responsibilities that you just don't like doing. When the brain no longer feels stimulated by the sameness, for example of a relationship, sex, work or play, or you begin taking things for granted the duldrums set in. I find that I can compensate for this by trying to anticipate a head of time those times that sometimes get mundane. Planning in advance, or looking at whatever is making me feel paralized for the moment and trying to play a game with my head by rewarding myself for example with a 5 min break after I complete reading for an assignment or going to the movies when I complete a mundane task or pretending I'm on a date with my husband for the first time. By far the best remedy I've found is exercising. It helps me fight that exhausted bored feeling and keeps me from getting depressed. This is the best medicine, the least expensive, and the healthiest. I find it easy to stay motivated by focusing on how much better I will feel after or by keeping it interesting and new by sometimes exerciseing with a friend or using music or changing the routine. For wasn't dignosed with ADHD till I was 40, I believe that up till then exercise was my medicine now I've added some adderral which helps alot but I compensated in the past with what I've written above.
I have suffered from paralysis of the will (for lack of a better term) for years without knowing what it was. At times, I would go completely catatonic, unable to move or speak. This would last until someone else stepped in and got the situation resolved. It seemed that whenever my brain had to make an immediate choice in a painful situation, it just went numb instead. It also affects me on a day-to-day basis. Facing some task I really do want to do, and knowing it should be/needed to be done, I will start, then abruptly stop and walk away. I am grateful for any information fellow sufferers have to share about this phenomenon.
my friends call this "deer in headlights" syndrome. It's a lot like having a sudden short curcuit within the brain. I think it has something to do with not producing the right chemicals that help deal with sudden increases in stress and anxiety. I've often wondered if it might not be related to the natural animal instinct to "freeze" until the "danger" (basically whatever is causing the sudden stress or anxiety, usually a tense situation or confrontation of some kind) is gone (being as how most predatory animals see motion, this makes sense to me.)
I used to have this happen to me when ordering food in restaurants, and especially when calling someone on the phone.
I also seem to have times however, when I can stop thinking and focus entirely on what I'm doing, and when I can, I can usually do incredible things. I hae to have a strong motivating factor, confidence in my knowledge and ability, and usually I have to have a feeling of pressure. i.e. when I "Have" to do it, (if it was my decision and it's something I feel strongly about) and I know how to do it and what to do and have all the resources to do it, and it's not mundane and repetitive, that's about the only time I can actually do it.
the one thing I hate about this is that it oftentimes makes me look absolutely pathetic (not just to others, but to myself as well) which just makes it worse.
I would guess that it's not uncommon. I experience both fatigue and what I would guess is your "paralysis of will" on a regular basis. When I experience it, it's as if certain mental processes are put on autopilot, and my will/attention evaporates. For example, if I'm reading, I will actually continue to read, usually even sounding off each word in my head, but for most intents and purposes I am asleep. After a varying amount of time, I will suddenly snap to my senses and realize that I have absolutely no clue what I've been reading or even how many pages I've missed. I'll also regain awareness if something unexpected happens near me. It's very frustrating, and it's definitely not limited to reading. It happens when I'm walking, programming, rarely when I watch a movie, very often in meetings, and sometimes when my fiance is speaking to me. I struggle very, very hard with it on a daily basis, and it leaves me feeling more or less dead and/or "fried". You can't completely beat it, but you can definitely make headway if you try hard enough-- even without toxic meds.
Others have given you good advice that I'll repeat because it's helped me a lot. Exercise helps a lot to improve the fatigue and the vanishing awareness. I've also been sticking to a vitamin/supplement regiment for the past 6 months or so, and it's been helping me considerably. Keeping a regular sleep schedule also seems to help, but that's not always easy, at least for me. Sometimes the brain just doesn't want to shut off, even though all the circuits are fried...