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A lot of people tend to project their faults on to others. I doubt if it's common for people to project the actual term "Narcissism" outside of areas where it has become a common term of reference such as support communities.
However, within those areas, I have observed a significant number of what would appear to be blatantly obvious NPD sufferers who have discovered NPD for the first time, and immediately decided to attribute it to their primary victims, rather than themselves.
(If you are reading this and think I mean you, then I probably don't!)
Narcissists project their own disorder onto others. They "label" others with their own problems.
The reverse process happens to victims.
Some people adopt the role of a professional victim. In doing so, they become self-centered, devoid of empathy and, abusive and exploitative. In other words, they become narcissists. The role of "professional victims" - ones whose existence and very identity is defined solely and entirely by their victimhood - is well researched in victimology. It doesn't make for a nice reading.
These victim "pros" are often more cruel, vengeful, vitriolic, lacking in compassion and violent than their abusers. They make a career of it. They identify with this role to the exclusion of all else. It is a danger to be avoided. And this is precisely what I called "Narcissistic Contagion" or "Narcissism by Proxy".
These affected entertain the (false) belief they can compartmentalize their narcissistic behaviour and direct it only at the narcissist. In other words, they trust in their ability to segregate their behaviour patterns: verbally abusive towards the narcissist - civil with others, act with malice where the narcissist is concerned - and with Christian charity towards all others.
They cling to the "faucet theory". They believe that they can turn on and off their negative feelings, their abusive outbursts, their vindictiveness and vengefulness, their blind rage, their non-discriminating judgment. This, of course, is untrue. These behaviours spill over, into daily transactions with innocent others.
One cannot be partly or temporarily vindictive and judgmental any more than one can be partly or temporarily pregnant. To their Horror, these victims discover that they have been transmuted and transformed into their worst nightmare: into a narcissist.
Narcissism is contagious and that many victims tend to become narcissists themselves: malevolent, vicious, lacking empathy, egotistical, exploitative, violent and abusive.
No, they avoid the word, pretend it doesn't exist. They don't like their victims being educated and try to change the subject. They will laugh and tell you, "oh you think everyone is a narcissist."
I might have to agree on that one. People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder feels that their way of thinking (the grandiosity, the abuse) is the "right" one. They actually think that they are normal, and that other people are either hypocrites or crazy. As such, they think that the entire psychology community is wrong about "denigrating" narcissism.
On the other hand, they can also use NPD as an ammunition to attack others, but only when they haven't discovered that they themselves have NPD. If they have discovered their own NPD, then lo and behold, they recreate a new world where NPD is a "holy" characteristic.
Wiki User
∙ 8y ago
Wiki User
∙ 9y agoThat's probably not a good idea unless you know what you are doing and know the person well enough.
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Is it common for Narcissists to have a mask like facial expression and not laugh complain and insult people?
Narcissists come in different personalities, but, all retain one thing in common ... control over their mate and those around them, argumentative and they are ALWAYS right. Narcissists are often extremely intelligent, but haven't the wisdom to use this intelligence in a good way and use it to destroy and play games with people's emotions. Life is a game to them. They often give off the air they are more intelligent than anyone around them (in a group) and thus the mask-like facial expression. Even some people that aren't Narcissists will put on the "mask face" to give others the impression they are deep and wise thinkers and highly intelligent. Narcissists don't have the same sense of humor as others and if someone tells a joke the Narcissist will ridicule or scoff at the joke, but in a few days or a week will tell the same joke (as if it was their own secret joke) and expect everyone to laugh at it. Those that don't are black-listed! Because Narcissists feel they are "God-like" and possess high intelligence they are arrogant and will often insult other people they feel don't stand up to their own validations of intelligence. To argue with or patronize a Narcissist is a waste of time! When I come across such people and they talk to me I'm polite, listen, seldom comment unless they ask for my opinion and if they want to argue with me I just excuse myself and walk away! I refuse to play THEIR game! So should you! == == Is is it asking if narcissists typically don't laugh, complain, or insult people? Most narcissists do laugh, complain, and insult people, even if only subtly. You shouldn't judge a person to be a narcissist based on his facial expression. Its true in some cases and not in others; unreliable. You judge a person to be a narcissist based on his or her treatment of other people and how the person acts. Narcissists frequently demean others. You will never hear words of encouragement or compliments about your abilities from a narcissist, unless the narcissist is patronizing you (back-handed compliment). Narcissists do not verbally acknowledge others with talents or gifts unless they are threatened by them. In that case the person becomes a target and is more likely to be verbally attacked or slandered by the narcissist. Being proud of one's achievements doesn't make one a narcissist; repeatedly pointing them out in order to seek affirmed does. Narcissists constantly need to be told how great they are; that is the only purpose other human beings serve to them. In the presence of a narcissist you will quickly be made aware of facts you did not ask to hear about, such as the advanced courses the person has taken and the person's standing with Mensa. Refusing to admit an error when a person does not believe he or she has made one does not make a person a narcissist; distorting the issue and belligerently arguing the point in order to always appear correct does. A narcissist will NEVER truly admit to being wrong and in the case where he or she is wrong, the narcissist will adopt the position that he or she had the correct position all the time and you only misunderstood. If a person you believe is a narcissist has a habit of sincerely complimenting the achievements of others, tries to actually help other people succeed and improve, admits that he or she has made an error on occasion, and does not often point out his or her own achievements, then you aren't dealing with a narcissist. Even if that person seems abrasive or rude, you aren't dealing with a narcissist. Food for thought (this is not directed to either authors above): If you have never considered the possibility that you might be a narcissist.... If you feel that a person who tries to explain ideas to you that you do not agree with is trying undermine your credibility..... ....and if you feel that every intelligent person who does not admit that you are correct when that person does not believe that you are correct is a narcissist, ...you actually might be the narcissist. I totally agree with the comments of the above poster as a warning to the person asking the question. I answered the question as if the person was a narcissist as asked by the person asking the question. As the above poster pointed out facial expressions can mean many things. Personally I don't believe in arm chair psychology and I am beginning to detest the term 'narcissist' so readily used. Unless a professional has diagnosed his/her patient as such then a layman has no right to label another person (who may simply be a perfectionist to arrogant) as a narcissist. I might add that humans (no matter who) have a titch of it in their personality.
What is called person who love lowering self esteem of others?
A common label for that is a bully, but I'm sure there are others.
Do narcissists always discard those they love?
By definition, a narcissist loves himself. Sometimes his self love interferes with other relationships. It has been called the condition of our time. Is it a disease? That's just a label. If someone is unable to maintain a relationship because of self love, do you pity him or hate him? If he feels that he is able to live his life the way he wants, it
If you completely ignore a narcissist will he act as if you are superior to him and subsequently behave himself?
Again, narcissism is a rare and serious diagnosed personality disorder, not a label. By nature of the disorder a true narcissist wouldn't think anyone is superior to him.
Can Narcissists really appreciate or even understand art humor or other forms of higher thinking?
You're trying to turn them into some sub-human species. Narcissism just means that they are self absorbed. Technically, the term means "self love", but they are people, have aspirations, concerns, phobias and most even have a sense of humor. It is true, however, that many narcissists have difficulty "getting" jokes or understanding hints. It has been noted that this narcissistic trait can resemble autism. This may be due, at least in part, to the emotional dissonance they self create and nurture in themselves. They also lack empathy and "other mindedness", which may prevent an understanding of someone else's metaphors or reasoning. And there is often a resistance to understanding humor. Since interpreting "higher" forms of humor can mean deferring one's own sense of reality in order to get into "someone else's mindset", a narcissist may feel that to do so would mean relinquishing his own sense of superiority over the rest of the human race. A narcissist must always be the cleverest and most superior person in the room. To detach from one's "human" qualities and to see the rest of the human race as inferior can limit the scope of humor to sarcasm and crassness. Or simpler imagery. A narcissist will often come to see himself almost as a Spockian computer, and though he may laugh along with jokes when he sees others do so, the response is often a forced one. Narcissism has been called the mental illness of our time, meaning that our misguided attempts at child discipline hasn't really worked and some of them have turned into self absorbed jerks. But even self absorbed jerks are people. Don't confuse narcissists with psychopaths or sociopaths. That's a completely different animal, and animal is the right word. Narcissists Narcissists can be highly intelligent, passionate and for sure have many desired traits, such as a sense of humor. These traits are how they attract wonderful people to them in the first place. Narcissists can be extremely dangerous abusive people. Of course narcissists are people, but are lacking in ways we associate with being human, such as having empathy, remorse or caring about others if they hurt them. Narcissists can pretend to feel love and may show loving, generous and kind behavior and actions, but this is for appearances. The people who are close to a narcissist see a person so different that it doesn't seem like the same person. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a pathological disorder and many narcissists are psychopaths and sociopaths, or both. There are plenty of older narcissists however the media today uses the term loosely by labeling people who are self absorbed, arrogant, competitive and who have grand views of themselves as narcissists. Narcissistic Personality Disorder far exceeds the mere label of a self absorbed person. Plenty of good people may be self absorbed. The same is true with other labels such as selfish, conceited and arrogant. These words may well be part of a narcissist's personality, but not necessarily. They certainly do not describe Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Narcissists abuse people. The abuse from a person with NPD, especially what is considered malignant Narcissistic Personality Disorder leaves victims horribly traumatized. Domestic violence is usually hidden, especially when it's in the form of psychological abuse. "Sub-human," isn't the same as saying a person with Narcissistic Personality Disorder lacks the emotions we generally associate with being human. There is a continuum of narcissism and a person who has the personality disorder is a person who cannot love, unless you believe that love includes severe intentional psychological abuse. As to a severe narcissist, his or her concerns, phobias, and aspirations will surely be all about him or her. Many people with NPD are intelligent and passionate people. Unfortunately, this only makes them better at abusing the people close to them. Perhaps a narcissist can understand forms of higher thinking, but do they appreciate anything that doesn't feed their narcissistic supply?
What record label is Common signed to?
Common used to be signed to Kaye West's GOOD Music label but is now signed with Warner Bros. Records.
What conditions might indicate counseling is necessary for the survivor of a relationship with a narcissist?
When you are living with a person that is either physically or mentally abusing you (narcissists are game-players and mind-benders) then the mate that got away needs to go for counseling because the narcissist never will. Narcissists brain-wash their victims. Some victims are slightly abused because they leave the relationship earlier on, while others have put up with it for years and never knew what was wrong with their mate. It isn't important we label the person hurting us, but it's important one gets away from it. Rule of thumb ... when someone hurts you or makes you feel terrible most of the time rather than peaceful or happy it's time to move on! If you love someone you don't make an effort to play games or hurt them. None of us are perfect and we've certainly hurt our mates on occasion (vice-versa for them) but the difference is we say we are sorry and try to rectify what we have done. ANYONE who has been in an abusive relationship needs counseling.
Draw a common Wave and label the following parts?
Draw a wave and label four parts
Is the contempt the narcissist feels for his partner based on a real or imagined inferiority?
Narcissists can feel contempt for many people and not just their spouse. They have a high regard for themselves and feel they are more intelligent than the rest of the world and become extremely impatient if they feel the person they are talking too isn't "getting it." They may be great chameleons and get along with coworkers, but inwardly feel that person is a total fool. They know who is boss in their workplace and will follow orders, but if they have a chance they will "go for the gold" thinking they are far better at that particular job. Some people label these types as "over-achievers." Narcissists are extremely complex people. Some actually do love their spouse and children and do strive to be a good person in their community, but they also strive for an inhuman level as far as intelligence and control. According to most narcissists they feel they are far more superior than most people they are around. The truth of the matter is, that narcissists are extremely clever, but misuse this God given right. Narcissists are always into competition and that includes their spouse. It's more of a vicious mind game than having a real or imagined inferiority complex. Narcissists don't feel inferior at all! Bottom line, they need psychological help, but because narcissists ride on the great back of ego they will rarely ever seek counseling.
What are the statistics on Narcissists and marriage and divorce?
Unfortunately you will never get correct stats on this. The label "Narcissist" is used too widely and a person could simply be ego-tripping, a perfectionist or a perfect poop, but not necessarily a narcissist. It would take a therapist to label such a person and many people never feel the need to seek out psychological counseling so true stats will never be on this one. this is a deep question. we will never know the answer to that. So many victims cannot speak up and so many abusors, Ns or not fail to seek help. IT does seem pervasive by what i HAVE read on clinical studies that N's seem to DEPEND on having a long term "mate" around with which to feed off. Not a true marriage as in love honor cherish etc. Well, just read some of the posts and better yet articles of actual diagnoses.
What is your name answer please?
Your name is a label given to you, usually by parents to identify you to others.
What is the difference between megalomania and narcissism?
Hmmm... 'Megalomania' is a word derived from Greek. 'Narcissism' is a word derived from the name of a Greek god. Other than that, probably not much... Megalomania is a thirst for fame, glory, spectacle, conquest, etc., and it requires supporting players and an audience. Narcissism is simply falling in love with oneself. Someone could be a narcissist while deprived of human company, but a megalomaniac would be out of business.
