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Most men aren't abusive. Most men feel secure enough that they don't need to hit a woman to feel strong. Having said that, it can be difficult to get over traumatic things that happened to you. You may need to visit a counselor. It's not saying anything bad about you, you've been through some bad experiences and sometimes it's a good idea to learn some coping strategies.

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โˆ™ 2006-03-18 06:37:47
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Q: What are some things one can do so to trust their new partner after being in a past abusive relationship?
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How can you tell when your in a abusive relationship?

the way to tell if you are in an abusive relationship is if your partner is forcing you to do things that are harmful to your saftey, or dangerous. like things you dont want to do. so remember, being forceful, or hurting one another in a relationship is abusive. even if it is the smallest thing like a hit on the head becasue you said no, its still abusive..hope this helped

What is the relationship of wants?

It is a relationship that dwells on one being needful of or clingy to their partner. It means you always want your partner to things for you, or be there for not caring whether they can make time for that or whether they can afford to do fulfill your wish. It is being self centered in a relationship and not caring about your partner's needs or wants.

Can a man from non-abusive upbringing become an abuser if with a partner who grew up in an abusive home with no therapy at all?

It is highly unlikely that man who does not have an abusive personality will become an abuser if their partner grew up in an abusive home and refuses help. Good men know they should never hit a woman which in some cases can lead to male abuse by a woman. The stress of being around an abusive person be it verbally or physical abuse is bound to have effects on the non abusive partner, but most men will only take so much and have the opportunity of leaving the relationship.

Does the abuser really love the person being abused?

No the abuser does not love that person they love controlling and abusing that person and that's it. It is difficult for there to be love in an abusive relationship. The abuser can not truly give love or receive it because he or she is mentally disabled. The abusive personality is a mental disorder and the abuser needs to seek psychiatric help. An abusive relationship is not a healthy one and no matter what the abuser says, he or she can not love you, it is obsession and control that drives an abusive partner.

Should you stay in an abusive relationship or should you go now?

You should definitely go. An abusive relationship is unhealthy for you both physically and emotionally. If you continue to stay with that abusive person, you will more than likely end up being attracted to more abusive people in the future. In fact some abusive relationships can lead to suicide and/or being murdered.

If your husband is being abusive and you tell him that you're going to kill him if he doesn't let go are you being abusive?

People tend to say things in anger. Since your husband is abusive you should consider going to a Woman's Abuse House to find help and learn tools to cope. No one has the right to abuse the other. Your relationship is toxic and you are in control of your life and not your husband. To tell him you are going to kill him is a serious accusation and when you get to this point it's time for you to leave this abusive relationship.

Can you leave if you are in an abusive relationship and take your children?

AnswerSome women can, others can not. This is dependent on your situation, and the relationship that you have with your children. Often, if they are close to your abusive partner; taking them will not be an option. That would only become an option after a court case. Taking your children with you is often a favorable decision, especially if they are young. However, if taking them increases your chances of being hurt - do not do it. The most dangerous time in an abusive relationship is when the victim leaves, so do not place yourself in additional danger. You must assess the situation.

How can you spice up your relationship?

You can spice up your relationship by being a little spontanious with your partner.

Who are the victims of an abusive relationship?

The person being abused and any children who are there to witness it are victims.

How can you be happier in your relationship?

Being honest and telling ur partner the truth.

How do you get out of a abusive relationship after being in for about 30 or more years.?

Getting out of an abusive relationship is the same, whether you've been together 30 days or 30 years. Please read the info in the link I provided below.

How many women a year die from being in an abusive relationship?

according to surveys and newspapers approximatly an average of 72 women die from abusive relationships and rape.

If you are being verbally and physically abused what can you do if he thinks it's your fault because you push his buttons?

Blaming the victim, or partner is one of the many ways the abusive person uses to confuse the victim and/or to make it "seem" acceptable. Please read The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans and visit for more information.

How does domestic abuse start?

You may be in an abusive relationship, wondering whether it is, or simply confused by mixed emotions regarding your partner; you may have escaped and are trying to make sense of what happened; you may know someone who is being abused and want to understand what they are going through; or you may be worried that you are abusive towards the person you love.

You treated your partner badly and she left?

Well, only you know what you did and how unforgivable it was. If there was any chance of its being abusive, then you'll need to let her go for good. Work on changing your values and get behavioral therapy before taking on a new relationship.

What are the advantages of being with an abusive partner?

There are no advantages of being with an abusive partner. If you've been one of the unfortunate people to have been with one, the only upper is that you may be able to recognize some signs when entering future relationships. You may even be able to help friends or others escape the same kind of horror before it destroys them.

Abusive partner thinks im cheating?

Oftentimes, abusive partners will transfer their aggression physically and mentally. In addition to whatever abuse your partner is already giving you, this just might be one more thing. It could be insecurity, anger or hatred that is causing your partner to do this. Examine it but look out for yourself first! Your safety and well-being should always be a top priority!!!

Why do you need attention from your boyfriend?

Attention is needed in a relationship for the same reason water is needed in a plant. if you are not getting or receiving attention from your partner then what is the point of calling them your partner or even being in a relationship? This can lead them to go out seeking another partner to get attention from.

Why should women get out of abusive relationships?

Women should get out of an abusive relationship because it may escalate from emotional abuse to physical or sexual abuse, sometimes even murder. No one deserves to be abused and to stay in an abusive relationship is not worth it. If you are being abused, please leave and find help, especially if you have children, you need to protect them too.

How do you know if you are in an abusive relationship?

Well easy, are you being called names (not jokingly) or hit, punched ect? OR being told you have to prove your love by... or you might be consistantly being yelled at...

What is the relationship between forgiving and forgetting?

Forgiving is giving your partner another chance for them to prove themselves to be worthy of you and being able to repair your tortured heart. Forgetting is being able to obliterate the hurt that your partner created in your relationship. Both mixed together create the perfect plan in saving a broken relationship.

How do you respond to congratulations for being in a relationship?

Just say thanks and start talking about how awesome your partner is.

How do you stop being too emotional in a relationship?

You have to take deep breathes and just trust your partner.

Should you trust your partner?

You should trust your partner! trust is one of the most important signs in a relationship but if he was not trust worthy theres no point being with him/her

Can get an answer from an abuser if you ask them reason for their abusive nature?

No, because if they are still being abusive, they see the world from another perspective. If you are expecting that this will happen or that you can convince someone that they are abusive, chances are that you won't see it happen. About all you can do is to call them on their behavior, saying how it makes you feel. A good book is Patricia Evan's The Abusive Relationship.