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What are the statistics on narcissists and affairs?

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2009-02-15 04:02:41
2009-02-15 04:02:41

I read this in a book titled something like "Personality Disorders in Modern Life" published by Wiley: There are two factors that determine whether someone is cheating (i.e. whether someone is sexually promiscuous or sexually conservative). One is impulsiveness. In other words, lovers/spouses with impulsive behaviors will cheat more often than those who don't. The other factor is narcissism! Narcissists cheat more often than those who don't. It would be a safe bet that a partner with NPD would be more likely to enter into affairs albeit very brief then someone with a stable personality. We call them affairs because the promiscuous one still holds onto the original relationship whilst exploring other ones. A narcissist would like to hold onto the original one as a safe base. He or she may tire of the original source yet not wanting to completely let go, until he or she is satisfied that the newer source will provide the fix that he or she needs. If that is discovered i.e. the new source will provide a new and fresh fix, you can be guranteed that the NPD will dump you in a cold hearted manner. If the new source is not a promising new fix, then the NPD will stick by you a little longer yet still explore the field- like a Shark testing its prey i.e. bite and taste, if the shark doesnt like what it tastes it will swim away and not bite again. Sometimes there will be a stage in this process, which I think is the most dangerous and mentally damaging situation, that is the NPD may stick with you through the transition period. He or she will still use words like "I love you" or "i would never cheat", even though the NPD is actually in the setup stage with its new source. The mentally damaging part of this is that the victim will see the tell tail signs, i.e. sudden distance in communication and or physical attributes such as sex. When the victim goes to confront the NPD of those signs, the NPD will manipulate the victim into thinking that he or she is just being paranoid, possessive, smothering, and worthless. The NPD will then use that as get-out clause i.e. you were to paranoid, you were to possessive and therefore break up and blame you for the break up when in the end you were not in the wrong. When something doesn't smell or look right then it usually isn't- keep well away from those dangerous creatures.

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