Asked in RelationshipsAbused MenDating
What do you do about a person who doesn't want to commit do you wait it out or do you move on?
November 19, 2006 1:26AM
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If this is not the case, you may have found a bug in the software. Please report this to an administrator, making note of the URL. The world is about "risk taking" and this is one of those times. You aren't happy because the person you love refuses to commit. If you stay they will just take advantage of the situation and you'll be unhappy, not to mention wasting your life. A good suggestion is to sit down with this person and tell them that you aren't willing to keep going together or living together without commitment. To commit means you love that person unconditionally, so, because this person isn't committing to you, they can't love you. Of course they will say they do and give you all kinds of reasons why they can't commit, but don't buy into it. If they refuse to comply, then tell them you're moving on and do it! This is a risk and the person may leave and not come back, but then again, they may come back on bended knees and the rest is history. When I went with my second husband we lived together only on the weekends (he lived a long way from my apartment) and this went on for approx. 4 years. It was enough! Either he committed to marriage or we walked away from each other. We did the latter. My heart was broken, but I moved on. I dated, but nothing serious during that time and I went out with my friends, and worked. I honestly thought that was it, but as fate would have it (we must have been meant to be together) my boyfriend and I were in the same wedding party. We were pleasant to each other, but that was as far as it went. A week later he called me begging to come back, and I stood my ground! When he came back he knelt on one knee and gave me an engagement ring. Did I make it easy for him? Of course not! I eventually took the ring and we've been married for 33 years. Take the risk. You'll never lose. If you set something free and it doesn't come back (count yourself lucky) and if this person does come back then you know for sure they love you. Good luck Marcy I think its fine just to hang out and have a good time with that piticular person who doesnt want to commit, if you like them and they like you, then things will progress on there own, maybe at a slower speed but sometimes you have to adjust to your boyfriend/girlfriend.