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Having Lived with a borderline NPD there are a few key differences... A true narcissist is almost totally wrapped up in themselves, and the entire world revolves around their needs and desires. The borderline I lived with had moments of minor concern for others, to a point of actually seeming to care how I felt or what I needed... She bought me a large tool box for Christmas, and had to lug it into the front room. It was to large to lift, but she managed to wrap it sitting on the floor. The tol box was a great thought for a present, but, I was constantly reminded of how much she cared for me because of the extra effort she had to go through to get it into the house and wrap it etc... and she usually reminded me when others were around... just to re-enforce my acknowledgement of how much she cared about me because of what she did... subtle but mostly it was about her... Thank the stars I am living alone now... after 10 yeaars I just had to 'walk away' from that abusive relationship...but still got a lawyer to protect my interest in the material properties...

Think of a continuum, with Sensitivity at one extreme end and Insensitivity at the other.

A Narcissist is close to the Insensitivity end, but a Borderline is close to the Sensitivity end.

A Narcissist is halfway psychopathic. The difference is that they do have normal emotions. But they have no empathy.

A Borderline can often be empathic to a fault, taxing his or her strength and putting others before him or herself until it becomes health-threatening.

Borderlines have an extremely alert cerebral cortex and are easily excited. And they are most often excruciatingly sensitive. Often, they also have an overbearing and self-punishing conscience.

AnswerThere are many similarities. Actually the Borderline and Narcissist both are wrapped up in their own universe with little or no concern for others and how their behavior affects others. However the N is wrapped up in his own self image and buries his emotions while the BPD is wrappd up in their imediate needs and have no control over their own emotions. The BPD is capable of empathy however because they have feelings for themselves as far as pain rejection etc. She only seems to empathize with you for a while only and *ONLY IF* it pertains to her universe.

NPD expects others to revolve around his universe as if to be a satellite dependent on worshipping him as a god. While the BPD wraps her universe around you as if to FUSE your very existense to themselves, you are her universe. Both NPD and BPD are extremely fearfull of abandonment but handle it in two different ways. BPD will cling to you while the NPD ever concious of his self image will abandon you before you have a chance to abandon him. Both of them have excessive Rage emotions built up. The BPD will dump on you while the NPD dumps you alltogether. ( I use male for NPD and female for BPD because that is how the genders are likey to be diagnosed - however either geneder can suffer from either disorder)

BPD has an arrested emotional development set at age three while NPD is set at age six. Some authorities suggest its all all along the same continuim as Narcissistic Personality Disorder. With NPD at one end and BPD at the other. They are both in the same "B" cluster of personality disorders also with histrionic and antisocial personality disorders. IN fact many BPDS have been co-morbidly diagnosed as also having NPD. The degree of functionality among three of them is something like this Histrionics are more able to function in society than narcisssists who in turn fare better than Borderlines.

Those close to Borderline or Narcissist will find ways to deal with them are very much the same. Also the effect they have on others close to them are stikingly similar. Manipulating, lies, deception, self centeredness. and most of all a complete lack of concern for anyone but themselves. They just chose to cover it up in different ways.

I know all this because my so called "mother" was a full blown (diagnosed) Borderline Personality Disorder and eventually got locked up because of it. I have also had two "relationships" with NPDs decades apart. Looking back the characteristics of them were nearly identical to Mommie dearest. They just concaeled their true intentions better. The first one I had no realization what was going on until it was too late and I'd been burned - Bad. the second one i found out just in time and GOT OUT!

Anyone that has been raised by a borderline or narcissist will have a tendency to attract N's because they have already been "trained". If you even think you are getting involved with one of either get out now. They are nothing more than a parasite set to suck the very life out of you.

***Many people with BPD can and do recover if they are willing to get help and examine how their actions have affected others. Because they can empathize - just like a 3 year old can - it is possible for them to "grow up" mentally and emotionally with the help of a therapist/psychiatrist/support group. Doctors used to believe that is was very difficult to treat BPDs but are now finding that those diagnosed in their 20s often overcome many of their BPD behaviors by their 30s. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO ABANDON a loved one with BPD. It's just like dealing with an alcoholic - you may have to pull away in order for them to get help, but once they do, they can see the error in their ways.

i was diagnosed Borderline and i have almost recovered now. its taken 7 years. but i didn't try find my identity in another person, i felt i didnt really have an identity and didnt like myself so i tried to use other things to gain a sense of being. at the same time i often felt very in need of compliment sto bolster my fluctuating ego.


Both disorders tend to over-emphasize the centrality of the person who has the disorder in the wider scope. The differences tend to be in terms of motivation and the payoff.

BPD tend to be heavily driven by a bipolar fear - fear of being hurt through intimate exposure of themselves to others, and fear of being isolated and abandoned. One may argue that these are two sides of the same fear, but with regards to the social expression of this fear, it results in rapid and unpredictable flip-flopping between adoration and repulsion.

NPD tend to be heavily driven by autoerotic interest - pleasing themselves takes on a higher priority than fearing retribution, although high profile NPDs also tend to share paranoia - they seek to defend their perfect image of themselves and are easily frustrated by confrontations or challenges to their self-image.

Both disorders can result in the individual losing all sense of boundaries of self due to lack of emotional discipline. The difference is often that BPD will recognize and admit that they have feelings of inadequacy and will even use expression of those feelings to prevent isolation. NPD will never recognize such feelings - the external world serves either to support their grandiosity or it cowers in secretive jealousy.

Both disorders also include the attitude that they are special cases and therefore have special entitlements or are above the law. In the case of BPD, this can result in erratic stalking behavior or pre-emptive defense tactics that come off to stable individuals as excessive and/or overtly aggressive. In the case of NPD, this results in exploitative behavior towards any who are perceived as weak, poor, naive, etc. Many sexual abuse cases involve NPD - often with children who were also raised by NPD parents and are thereby groomed to respond to the emotional needs of adults. NPD patients often struggle with pornography and narcotics addictions.

Both disorders utilize deceit. BPD will unconsciously rescript historical events in order to justify their behavior and avoid shame and ostracism. Deceit for a BPD is closer to an involuntary trauma response. NPD will consciously fabricate historical events to portray a reflection of their ideal self-image. Deceit for an NPD is a form of willful self-delusion.

BPD has slightly better treatment odds than NPD - though both disorders are very challenging for any therapist to treat. In most cases treatment stops either because of the client's grandiosity or paranoia. At times treatment stops when clients become too much of a drain on the therapist's psyche or time schedule.

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Q: What is the difference between narcissistic personality disorder and borderline personality disorder?
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Related questions

What is the between narcissistic personality disorder and borderline personality?

a narcissistic personality involves a person that is VERY vain. they must always be the center of attention, and they talk about themselves highly.

What movies or films will be of good use for studying personality disorders?

Some good movies and films for studying personality disorders are "Gone With the Wind" (narcissistic personality disorder), "Funny Girl" (narcissistic personality disorder), "Girl, Interrupted" (borderline personality disorder), "The Godfather" (antisocial personality disorder), and "Wall Street" (antisocial personality disorder).

When did doctors first start diagnosing Borderline personality disorder and narcissism?

Narcissistic personality disorder was made an official diagnosis in 1980 (although it had been researched and studied for many years before that); borderline personality disorder was first written about in 1968.

What is the difference between personality disorder and boarderline personlity disorder?

Borderline personality disorder is one of many different types of personality disorders. Borderline personality disorder is one of many different types of personality disorders.

What is the difference between a borderline personality disorder and a personality disorder?

Borderline personality disorder is a specific personality disorder. A personality disorder is a set of traits and long held, often inflexible, beliefs which tends to interfere with "normal" functioning in society. There are different types of personality disorders. Borderline personality disorder is one of many specific classifications of personality disorders.

What is the difference between Contrast Borderline Personality and Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

Firstly, they are not the same disorder. Bordeline personality disorder consist of a person or people having emotional unstability and depth of moods whereas Narcissist personality disorder consist of a person or people being mentally ill and lacking empathy for others. They seem similar but very distinct. For one, Borderline can be cured Narcissism is uncurable and people are born Narcissistic, Bordeline is a developed dismalfunction through periods of time. Both are dangerous if untreated but one does have a solution, the other doesn't.

Can a person have narcissistic personality disorder and borderline personality disorder?

Yes, people who suffer from BPD (borderline personality disorder) frequently6 suffer from other psychiatric disorders (this is known as co-occurring) The disorders that most commonly "co-occur" with borderline personality disorder are mood disorders (depression and bipolar disorder), substance abuse, posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), eating disorders (particularly bulimia), attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, and anxiety disorders. And yes some people with BPD also meet the criteria for a second personality disorder. Personality disorders that often co-occur with BPD are narcissistic personality disorder and schizotypal personality disorder. Individuals with antisocial personality disorder also frequently display traits that meet the criteria for a comorbid diagnosis of BPD.

What other emotional disorders exhibit some sociopathic characteristics?

Psychopathy, Antisocial Personality Disorder, Asocial Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder are probably the closest. Some sources do not differentiate among some of these and sociopathy.

Are all mental abusers Narcissistic and what is the difference?

Not all mental abusers are. A narcissist is someone who suffers from a specific personality disorder called "Narcissistic Personality Disorder." This disorder is relatively rare. Not all abusers suffer from the Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) - although many of them have narcissistic traits.

Does bipolar disorder make you rage?

Sometimes it can, because it does have a tendency to have a high irritability rate. So can other diseases like conduct disorder, borderline personality disorder (BDP), narcissistic personality disorder, antisocial personality disorder, intermittent explosive disorder, or psychosis.

Are there any similarities in Antisocial Personality Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder?

Antisocial personality disorder and borderline personality disorder can both cause impulsive behavior.

What has the author Joan Lachkar written?

Joan Lachkar has written: 'The Narcissistic / Borderline Couple' -- subject(s): Narcissism, Marital psychotherapy, Borderline personality disorder, Psychoanalysis

How do you translate Borderline Personality Disorder into Farsi?

borderline disorder

Best medication for anger with borderline personality disorder?

Individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder have intense, unstable close adults with this disorder have highly changeable moods and intense anger, treatments are partially effective for Borderline Personality Disorder.

What other personality disorders have some characteristics of sociopathy?

Each personality disorder is classified into one of three "clusters": clusters A, B, or C. Cluster A is called the "eccentric" cluster, and it includes schizotypal, paranoid, and schizoid personality disorders. Cluster B is called the "dramatic" or "erratic" cluster, and it includes ASPD (another name for sociopathy), borderline, histrionic, and narcissistic personality disorder. Cluster C is called the "anxious" or "dependent" cluster, and it includes avoidant, dependent, and obsessive-compulsive personality disorders. Cluster B is the one that shares the most characteristics with sociopathy. Borderline personality disorder is a disorder that is characterized by emotional instability. People with borderline generally are described as "childish", and they often feel as if they are victimized. Their emotional swings often resemble those of sociopathy. Histrionic personality disorder is characterized by attention seeking, including excess seduction, being the "life of the party" even if there isn't a party, and have quick mood swings (which is something that all of Cluster B has in common). This disorder is similar to sociopathy because of the need for all of the attention to be on them. Finally, we come to narcissistic personality disorder. Those with narcissistic personality disorder think of themselves as the greatest thing alive. They are bad at taking criticism in any way. They require constant attention, and they may lie to achieve their own goals. The main reason that those with narcissistic personality disorder resemble sociopaths, though, is because they feel little to no empathy. To sum that long answer up, borderline personality disorder resembles sociopathy because of its mood swings, histrionic personality disorder resembles sociopathy because of the attention-seeking, and narcissistic personality disorder resembles sociopathy because of the near or full lack of empathy.

Passive-aggressive is it the same as borderline personality disorder?

Passive-aggressive is not the same as borderline personality disorder. One is a way of behaving and another is a personality disorder that would need observation.

What mental illnesses display sociopath tendencies?

* Antisocial personality disorder - Psychopaths/sociopaths * Narcissistic personality disorder * Histrionic personality disorder * Schizoid personality disorder * Borderline personality disorder These all have some of the symptoms of sociopaths, there may be more but these are the ones that I currently know of. This is a good reference site:

Can you have borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder?

Yes, you can have both a mood disorder such as Bipolar and a personality disorder such as Borderline. Yes especially if Bipolar Disorder goes untreated for a while it could develop into something more serious like Borderline PD, Narcissism, or ASPD (Antisocial personality).

What is boardarline personality disorder?

It's borderline personality disorder.

What is eupd?

Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder known as BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER

Sociopath is like what other disorders?

Sociopathy is the common name for someone suffering from Antisocial personality disorder. another common term is psychopath, though this is generally reserved for a more violent person with ASPD. Disorders like ASPD are, NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder.) and BDP (Borderline Personality Disorder)

Did Princess Diana have Borderline Personality Disorder?


What is the difference of narcissistic personality disorder and narcissistic rage?

Narcissistic rage is part of NPD. I don't know enough to properly explain it but you should Google NPD and you will learn a lot.

What has the author Patricia M Chatham written?

Patricia M. Chatham has written: 'Treatment of the borderline personality' -- subject(s): Accessible book, Borderline personality disorder, Personality disorders, Therapy, Borderline Personality Disorder, Personality Disorders

What famous people have narcissistic personality disorder?

Charlie sheen has been thought to have narcissistic personality disorder due to his carreer in being a jackass.