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What should you do if you've been married for almost 30 years to a man you didn't love because your mom had a drinking problem and you got married for all the wrong reasons but you have 3 great kids?

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March 11, 2009 11:12PM

Blame yourself, not your Mom. If you didn't love him, you were foolish to have kids with him. This is more common than one would think. At the time we don't realize we are perhaps marrying for all the wrong reasons. Still, you made a commitment and unless you are fighting with each other constantly and he is a good man, stay until the kids are older. If things are really rough between you then it's time to sit down and discuss where you want to go with your marriage ... kids or no kids. Children need a healthy environment. Once people have children, then it's a huge commitment (larger than most think) so you have to put them first and yourself second. There are many couples out there that split soon after their children have left home. They basically remained friends until the time they could be free of their responsibilities to their children.