"Abuser" and "Silet treatment" are labels, but what do they mean? An abuser is someone who harms you either physicaly or mentally. What is the extent of the abuse? What is the abuser's perspective. Many abusers feel justified in their actions. Many will feel that they were defending themselves emotionally or physically. Of course, if a big man feels threatened by a small woman and the big man uses his strength and size to "defend" himself against a woman who raises her hand against him, he certainly is being physically abusive. There is no excuse for a man to strike either a woman or somenone smaller UNLESS THERE IS NO OTHER OPTION. Unfortunately, abusers either loose control and strike out or consciously decide to control the abused using physical violence and intimidation. One abuser has anger managment issues, the other has self image issues. So first, you need to decide who the abuser is. Next, what is meant by "silent treatment"? Sometimes it's a person who is witholding emotional access in an attempt to manipulate behavior. Other times "silent treatment" can describe the behavior of someone who is ashamed of what he has done but refuses to acknowledge his dispicable behavior and tries to blame it all on the abused. "Look what you made me do." is a classic example of someone who is trying to blame the abused. Simply put, if you can't defend yourself against the abuser, get out. Physical abuse will increase until the abused is seriously injured. Run, don't walk to the nearest womens shelter.