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Why do men only see your gorgeous looks and charm?

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2005-11-25 01:09:54
2005-11-25 01:09:54

My, aren't we just full of our self today. You may be gorgeous truly, charming is doubtful, because if you were charming you wouldn't have put this post on the board in the way you did. Charming is foxy, not right out there. Lets see, you love to look at yourself in the mirror a lot, you are fussy about your hair, what brand your clothes are, what friends you choose, to the point of perfectionism. Your every gesture is thought out ahead of time. You're a "poser" and that means, you are well aware of how your body moves and what your best features are. I have a news flash for you .... while men certainly love to look at an attractive babe, most of them (those who gotta have it) will hook up with any type of woman; good looking or not. I too was considered attractive in my younger day, (have been told I still am for my age) but I never knew it until someone would give me a compliment. I was too busy having fun, getting to know other people and educating myself and volunteering at our local hospital. My father told me when I was younger "Don't think you can get through life on looks alone and you'd better start work on your inner self, because looks fade and you'd better have one good personality!" Working on the inner self is more important than what people look like on the outside. There is nothing more boring that a good looking woman (until she opens her mouth and the guy discovers how vain she is) or a handsome guy (until he thinks he's prettier than the woman he's with). I've dated male models, lifeguards, and plain good looking men, but most were self indulgent, boring and out to lunch. They were so into themselves they hardly noticed life. Yawn! I always likes a man that stood on his own two feet, worked hard (could be just a blue collar worker and didn't have to have scads of money) had a good sense of humor and loved life and had a kindness to his inner self. Some of the most sensuous people around are not just about looks, but the way they care about others, the way they move with pure independence, grace and knowledge. Love is all about chemistry, and if we don't have anything inside of us (because we are too into our outer self) then life is going to be very sad. Remember this, while you may be gorgeous there is another girl around the corner way better looking than you are and my dear, you are going to age. Get off your high horse and work on your inner self and you'll start attracting some guys worth getting to know. Volunteer, do something kind and useful. If you quit acting in the manner you are and are truly interested in the man you are dating at the time and really listen to what he has to say, then they may look past your good looks and actually see a human being in there. We are in a modern society of "the beautiful people" and if you don't have it, then you go buy it because of plastic surgery. Smart women don't buy into that, and they are too busy helping others, loving the man they have met or married, raising children and working. When it's all said and done, good men want the above .. a real woman! Marcy Marcy, hi thanks for your response. The reason why i asked this is because i want more from men now. Im tired of being eye candy. I am highly educated, i have a masters degree and a fulltime job. I am also a single Mother and a great mother. I am a good daughter, sister and friend. I love to laugh and enjoy life. I help others and am empathetic. Sorry that i cam across as shallow. I also never even date good looking men as I always have looked for who they are. Even though my choices of men have been bad i have never been shallow. It follows the same premise as the "good ol' boy" executive leaving a spouse to marry the ultimate "trophy wife." Some men only care how good the woman they are with makes them look, not with the woman as a person. These type men are insecure and more than likely love telling dumb blonde jokes at every opportunity, what they fail to realize is, they are the joke. I do apologize to you and when I see the question on the board, it's hard to know all of the person. Now that you have explained yourself I can see where you are coming from. I had a girlfriend that was perfect. She even had a great personality and you got me to thinking what she told me. She was sick of the men just seeing how pretty she was, and these men never got past her looks to see what a beautiful person she was inside. She eventually met a wonderful guy that, of course was attracted to her because of her looks, but then really fell in love with her when he saw what a good and kind person she was. I know when we post on this board there isn't a lot of room for explanations and so again I apologize for any hurt I have caused you. Don't ever change who you are. There will be a guy that comes your way that will see that wonderful light within you. Give it a chance. I know it's lonely, but this guy I know you will meet with well be worth it. Good luck hon Marcy

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