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This, actually, is the TYPICAL case. Abusers are constantly in denial. See these: http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/abuse4.html http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/faq73.html Abusers may be in denial of their abusive behavior, however we all have a sense of what is right and wrong behavior. We all have a sense of how we would like to be treated, including abusive people. I believe they know they are "in the wrong," but refuse to accept that. Sadly, many abusers probably were abused themselves and "blame" that as how they are. I don't believe in that trap. I grew up with an alcoholic parent and from a young age said I was not going to be like that because I hated how I felt. God Bless

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Is it possible for a young abuser to acknowledge his or her behavior and change?

AnswerSome abusers, regardless of age, do change (especially with the benefit of professional help in therapy, anger management classes, and medication).


When was Association for the Treatment of Sexual Abusers created?

Association for the Treatment of Sexual Abusers was created in 1984.


Once an ex-abuser sees you got stronger during the break from him why would he want to continue to see you if he admitted to all the abuse and you now are aware of his ploys?

You may be aware of his ploys, but are you strong enough to stay away? I volunteer in an women's abuse center and 95% of women go back to their abusers for different reasons: Can't find work Have children to support and can't do it on their own Lack self confidence and believes the abusers brain-washing Actually convinces themselves they love their abuser and he'll change Are terrified of an uncertain future You may not be any of the above and I hope you're in that 5% that don't go back. As you know better than anyone, abusers are about control. He can't stand losing out! He isn't interested in how you are doing, but rather how HE'S doing. He wants you back and doesn't like to lose. Abusers never change. Abusers are the ones that are weak and have no control over their lives (that's why they like to control the private environment around them.) When abusers are out in society they are the ones that feel angry, lack self confidence and feel those around them are mocking them. Abusers feel they should be getting better than they are out in society. The abuser is smart enough to know he/she won't get away with their behavior out in society so they give 100% of their fury to whomever is at home ... wife, girlfriend, children, siblings and even the elderly. I am sure proud of you and it took guts to leave him. You are on your way girl, so don't look back, don't feel sorry for him, and reach for the stars! Good luck hon Marcy


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