How can you get your husband away from his video games to spend time with his family?
There are several ideas below, as well as several more in the Discussion section for this question. The important thing is: Find somebody who you and him can talk to face-face. You need to find out if it is just a strong passion or if it is an addiction/obession. Based on that, will help shape how you move forward with it. Another thing, the only person who you can for-sure change behavior is yourself. The other person can be motivated to change, but everybody's motivation is different.
Maybe if you tried playing the games with him and show a true interest about the games, he will be more inclined to try something you want to do with the family. For men video games are a way to escape the stress and conflict of everyday life. My wife showed an interest and we now set time aside for video games and I set time aside for family. Hope this helps...
He needs to get his priorities straight. A game can never even begin to compare with the importance of family. Honest, open, and straightforward communication is the best idea. Try not to sound too accusing or angry though, because that will probably make him feel defensive.
Wow-it is nice to hear someone like me....It is sad but I just broke off my engagement and cancelled my wedding due to my fiance putting in 55 hours a week on his computer. He works 10 hours days as well. So to make a long story short-he spent no time with me at all. I tried to involve myself in his world. I really did. I showed an extreme interest in his realm. However, he did not want me in his world. He would get irritable if I interrupted his PC time. We literally spent 10 mins a day together and that was when he would suck down his dinner really fast and return to his PC. He skipped meals and he lets me do everything inside and out. He also lets his personal hygiene go as well. Thing is I can't afford to live on my own.
My advice to you is you could try to play with him but if he shuts you out I think you have huge problems you will need to address immediately. From what I have gone through if this were to occur again-I would be very direct about the issue. Sell the computer!
Speaking from experience: I used to play video games because of things I was missing from real life. A sense of strength, control, adventure, excitement, sense of accomplishment, relative freedom from responsibility, etc. All these can be granted through video games, and are often missing from the real lives of those who play too much.
Ask yourself - is he missing any/all of these elements from his real life? If so, how can you show him that video games are not as good as getting these from real life/family time? Is it possible in your current environment? What needs to change inside your family dynamic so that these needs are met? Chances are that not all of these needs can be met outside of video games (freedom from responsibility, for example), so don't expect him to sell the system any time soon (except to buy another one). But if you can show him that he can find strength, limited control, excitement, and a sense of accomplishment (on a consistent basis) he will probably begin to reduce the amount of time spent on the games.
I am in the same situation. I have tried to play the video games with him with a true interest and he does not want me to play because then there is a "Split screen". He too lets his personal hygiene go, and doens't spend enough time with our son because he's too busy yelling at us to get out of the way of the screen. He is a student retaking a class he took last term that he got a D in. Sad to say he was quite proud of his "D" stating that he is a genious for getting a "D" and not even trying hard in the class. Now he is retaking the class because he was told that a "D" is not going to get him into a program he wants to get into. He still isn't studying like he should, possibly wasting more money on another "D" although he may be pulling a "C" if he's lucky. Besides that he works 4 days a week, so he's not full time. I am in school myself. I was taking 14 credits but I ended up in the hospital (I'm pregnant) and had to withdraw from one course so now I'm only in school 2 days a week and not working. I have supported us financially with money I had in the bank. The money is now gone and it's up to him to support us. We luckily don't pay rent, and I am very good with managing money. My point is he thinks that because he works 4 days a week and he is in school for 2 hours on one of his days off, he is entitled to play video games all day every day on our living room television. Forcing me and my 3 year old son to tip toe around making sure we don't walk in front of our only television to block his view. Besides that I can't stand to see him wasting away sitting on the couch cursing into his earpiece in front of my son, this is a terrible example of what a man should be and I need my son to have a good male role model! I know this was about me, but I'm sorry I needed to vent. Good luck with your situation. I don't know what to tell you because I can't even help myself.
My guy and I been together for 12 years. Recently he started work on the computer and needed something to do when waiting here or there at times, so he found an online game and now half-azzzes his real work and stays on all day and night also. No time for us and when we are together all I see is little computer men like super Mario bros. NOT sexy. Almost 2 years now of no housework indoors or outdoors and no fun for sure.