How can you make your fiance see he's hurting you by always going out and leaving you to do all the work even when you've been at work all day and all you want is some of his time?

Answer 1

From the time man began, men went out to hunt for food, flop it on the ground and help the woman skin it, but the rest was up to her. Men still think they are in these times and figure if they go to work, come home, they have every right to sit in a chair, watch sports on TV, take a swig of beer, belch and crush the beer can on their forehead. It's time for young women to "tell them like it is!" Men really don't get it when they have responsibilities to their mate (being married or not) and unless the woman nips it in the bud then it will only get worse. You are planning to get married so it's time you sat down with him and without yelling or pouting explain to him what you expect from him. I've been married for over 30 years and in those 30s years my husband learned to help me. We realized it was about mutual respect and one picks up the slack when the other can't. So, if your fiance worked over-time then it's you who should do the housework and have a meal ready for him, but if it's YOU that has worked over-time then he should be doing the same thing for you. Remind your fiance that without your pay check a house for the two of you would be nearly impossible. If your fiance puts up an argument that it's "woman's work" then say, "going out and working is men's work!" Not so long ago it was an embarrassment for a man to have his wife work. He was the bread-winner and did the best he could. Then when WWII came along and most of the men went off to war, our lovely governments (Canadian and U.S.) discovered they had to lean on the women to help keep business' open in their hometowns, and factories moving at full speed, so women were hired. The women proved over and over again that they were just as good at many jobs as the men were, but when the men came home after the war, the women were told to go home and cook and raise their kids! Well, that was the start of another war, because the women had a taste of freedom and realized they had more in them than cooking, cleaning and raising children, and they fought for their rights. The rest is history. It is time both of you learned communication skills and that means that when you talk to him he's to tell you what is bothering him about your relationship just as you will tell him. If either of you don't like a particular situation it's best to sit down and go over it and come to a balanced conclusion to any problem you may have. Good luck Marcy