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Indirect communication means hinting or acting out. For instance, if you feel disappointed, "Hmmm" would be hinting. Stewing and pouting would be acting out what you feel instead of saying it.

One difficulty with indirect communications is that the data it gives is insufficient, not enough information for the spouse to be able to fix the problem and prevent it from happening again. With indirect communication, whatever was a problem today is likely to be a problem tomorrow, the next week and still in five years.

Saying directly one's concerns, by contrast, leads to solutions. "I'm feeling overwhelmed by cleaning the kitchen and also putting the kids to bed each evening. How would you feel about taking on kitchen clean-up?" Mary might ask. Bob might then answer, "If it's okay with you that I nap right after dinner, when I always feel so sleepy, I'd be glad to clean the kitchen after I wake up."

Direct communication- putting into words one's feelings and explaining one's concerns-leads to mutual understanding. With understanding plus goodwill, sure enough, problems get solved!

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Q: What is the difference between direct and indirect communication?
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