Why did she say she needs time to find herself?

Answer 1

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<P>Ive known my ex for over a year now since she started at Rally's at a different store than mine but i was getting hours over their for last years holiday. When the season was over i left that store and started to get hours only at my store. We had no contact. We would always get along great but she was in a 2 1/2 year relationship that turned into an engagement. I started going back to see her around 3 months ago and we started visiting eachothers stores working or not. I finally told her how i felt about her and we kissed and she started to break it off with him. Weve been together for 2 months 1 week and 5 days since they broke it off and it never really bothered her because he hit and yelled at her and knew how she would break and used it against her.

<P>Now a few days afterwards of being together i felt such a bond that i said i THOUGHT i had loved her. She told me the same thing. a few days went by and we had sex and she started to say she loved me while we were having sex. After that we had sex about every night and a couple more times she said maybe its not fair to say I love you since we only said it during sex. A few more days past and afterwards she said its not fair to only say it during sex and she could feel that she did love me and maybe i wasn't completely ready for that but i could feel it.

<P>Our bond grew through the past couple of months and she started saying after the first month that i saved her and she would have no problem going with me to Vegas right now(for marrige in a drive through church since it cost almost nothing). I wasn't ready for that so i said i wanted to finish school at least and get my life started but it could be a possibility down the road and she said she was fine with waiting. another week went past and she said maybe we should look for our own place. I said ok to that since i wanted to move out and by then i had a good feeling about her because she was saying i was her everything and how happy she is now since she was with me instead of her ex.

<P>Well her friends were starting to go downhill and not hanging out with them so she started to spend the night almost everynight and would bring me everywhere she went. For the past week she practically lost her best friend for 13 years and she went away and started to only see me from about 10 and then sleep and wake up about 9 and hang out with her friends without me. I brought this to her attention that i didn't know why it was changing. after i said that in the morning she ignored my calls and txts till about 6:30 when i called her phone from my house phone since it was a number she did not know because i never used it.

<P>We also have another dad together that we were adopted by (mostly religious not actually adopted) and for the past week ive kept doing what i have done but maybe a little to much since she started to tell him that i was getting annoying and clingy and that i have started to act like her ex through the things i would say and maybe its over.

<P>Her ex would not let her see her friends and he always looked through her phone every night so she had to delete txts and tell people not to call or txt since he was getting off work. I have never done this and i tried to do the opposite since she was hurt by him. I never touched her phone and i encouraged her to go see her friends even if they were guys since she reassured me that i was the one she came home to.

<P>She only told me that maybe she is not ready to have a person be their everything together yet since she was thinking about her ex boyfriend alot more now and she maybe doesn't think she had enough time to get over him even though she doesn't want to go back to him AT ALL.

<P>When i told her that i had talked to our dad over this she kept saying sorry that she didn't tell me and how i had to hear it from him. Ive been trying to give her space but it hurts so much right now since i started to believe she might be the one that i could marry even after 2 months of a relationship but knowing her for over a year. I didn't make the commitment yet but i was thinking about it more.

<P>Ive been trying to tell her that we should just do a break and not a break up but she thinks i will use this against her sometime down the road since that's how her ex did this to her. Ive told her and ive tryed to been there for her ever since it happend but i still don't feel like it is enough. I don't know how long she will be gone to go and "find herself"

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<P>HELP!!!</P>

Answer 2

She may feel lost or uncertain about her identity, goals, or desires. Taking time to find herself allows her to explore and reflect on what truly matters to her, regain clarity, and establish a sense of direction and purpose.