ass

1. Any of several hoofed mammals of the genus Equus, resembling and closely related to the horses but having a smaller build and longer ears, and including the domesticated donkey.
2. A vain, self-important, silly, or aggressively stupid person.

[Middle English asse, from Old English assa, perhaps of Celtic origin, ultimately from Latin asinus.]

1. 1. The buttocks.
   2. The anus.
2. Sexual intercourse.

[Middle English ars, from Old English ears.]

noun

One deficient in judgment and good sense: fool, idiot, imbecile, jackass, mooncalf, moron, nincompoop, ninny, nitwit, simple, simpleton, softhead, tomfool. Informal dope, gander, goose. Slang cretin, ding-dong, dip, goof, jerk, nerd, schmo, schmuck, turkey. See ability/inability.

In addition to the idiom beginning with ass, also see break one's ass; chew out (one's ass off); cover one's ass; drag one's ass; kick ass; kick in the pants (ass); kiss ass; make a fool (an ass) of; pain in the ass; stick it (up one's ass); you bet your ass.

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Many superstitions concern this familiar animal. The Egyptians traced his image on the cakes they offered to Typhon, god of evil. The Romans regarded the meeting of an ass as an evil omen, but the animal was honored in Arabia and Judea, and it was in Arabia that the ass of Silenus spoke to his master. Other talking asses were Balaam's ass (Numbers 22), which Mahomet placed in his paradise with Alborack; the ass of Aasis, Queen of Sheba; and the ass on which Jesus Christ rode into Jerusalem.

Some people have found something sacred and mysterious in the innocent beast, and a species of divination employed the head of an ass. At one time a special festival was held for the ass, during which he was led into the church while mass was sung. This reverence in which he was held by Christians was doubtless due to the black cross which he wore on his back, and which, it is said, was given him after the ass of Bethphage carried Christ into Jerusalem. But Pliny, who carefully gathered all that related to the animal, made no mention concerning the color of its coat. It seems likely, therefore, that the ass of today is as he always was.

It was not only the devout who respected the ass, for the wise Agrippa offered him an apology in his book, On the Vanity of the Sciences (1530). Among the Indians of Madras, the people of the Cavaravadonques, one of the principal castes, claimed to be descended from an ass. These Indians treated the ass as a brother, took his part, and prosecuted those who overburdened or ill-treated him in any way. In rainy weather they would often give him shelter when they denied it to his driver.

One old fable shows the ass in an unfavorable light. Jupiter had just taken possession of Olympus. On his coming, men asked of him an eternal springtime, which he accordingly granted, charging the ass of Silenus to bear the precious treasure to earth. The ass became thirsty and approached a fountain guarded by a snake, who refused to let the ass drink unless he parted with the treasure. The stupid animal thereupon bartered the gift of heaven for a skin of water, and since that time snakes, when they grow old, can change their skin and become young again, for they have the gift of perpetual springtime.

Another fable endows the creature with greater intelligence. In a village a few miles from Cairo, there lived a mountebank who possessed a highly trained ass, so clever that the country people took it to be a demon in disguise. One day the mounte-bank mentioned in the ass's hearing that the sultan wished to construct a beautiful building and planned to employ all the asses in Cairo to carry the lime, mortar, and stones. The ass immediately lay down and pretended to be dead, and his master begged for money to buy another. When he had collected some, he returned to his old ass. "He is not dead," he said; "he only pretended to die because he knew I had not the wherewithal to buy him food." Still the ass refused to rise, and the mountebank addressed the company, telling them that the sultan had sent out the criers commanding the people to assemble the next day outside Cairo to see the most wonderful sights in the world. He further desired that the most gracious ladies and the most beautiful girls should be mounted on asses. The ass raised himself and pricked up his ears. "The governor of my quarter," added the mountebank, "has begged me to lend my ass for his wife, who is old and toothless, and very ugly." The ass began to limp as though he were old and lame. "Ah, you like beautiful ladies?" said his master. The animal bowed his head. "Oh, well," said the man, "there are many present; show me the most beautiful." The ass obeyed with judgment and discretion.

These marvelous asses, said the demonologists, were, if not demons, at least men metamorphosed, like Apuleius, who was transformed into an ass. Vincent de Beauvais speaks of two women who kept a little inn near Rome and who sold their guests at the market after having changed them into pigs, fowls, or sheep. One of them, he adds, changed a certain comedian into an ass, and as he retained his talents under his new skin, she led him to the fairs on the outskirts of the city, gaining much money thereby. A neighbor bought this wise ass at a good price, and in handing it over the sorcerers felt obliged to warn the purchaser not to let the ass enter water. Its new master attended to the warning for some time, but one day the poor ass managed to get free and jumped into a lake, where it regained its natural shape, to the great surprise of its driver. The matter was brought to the ears of the pope, who had the two witches punished, while the comedian returned to of his profession.

Many stories are told of the ass that carried Jesus Christ into Jerusalem, which is said to have died at Verona, where its remains are still honored. They say the ass is a privileged animal that God formed at the end of the sixth day. Abraham employed it to carry the wood for the sacrifice of Isaac; it also carried the wife and son of Moses in the desert. The rabbis maintained that Balaam's ass was carefully nourished and hidden in a secret place until the coming of the Jewish Messiah.

n.

A public singer with a good voice but no ear. In Virginia City, Nevada, he is called the Washoe Canary, in Dakota, the Senator, and everywhere the Donkey. The animal is widely and variously celebrated in the literature, art and religion of every age and country; no other so engages and fires the human imagination as this noble vertebrate. Indeed, it is doubted by some (Ramasilus, lib. II., De Clem., and C. Stantatus, De Temperamente) if it is not a god; and as such we know it was worshiped by the Etruscans, and, if we may believe Macrobious, by the Cupasians also. Of the only two animals admitted into the Mahometan Paradise along with the souls of men, the ass that carried Balaam is one, the dog of the Seven Sleepers the other. This is no small distinction. From what has been written about this beast might be compiled a library of great splendor and magnitude, rivalling that of the Shakespearean cult, and that which clusters about the Bible. It may be said, generally, that all literature is more or less Asinine.

    "Hail, holy Ass!" the quiring angels sing;
    "Priest of Unreason, and of Discords King!"
    Great co-Creator, let Thy glory shine:
    God made all else, the Mule, the Mule is thine!"
                                                                  G.J.

An animal that signifies hard work and extreme stubbornness, the ass is also associated with stupidity.

Look up ass in Wiktionary, the free dictionary.

Ass may refer to:

• Ass (animal) or donkey
  • Asinus subgenus
• American English colloquialism for buttocks (and other derived meanings)
  • Same as arse (British spelling)
• Áss, the Old Norse for "deity"
• Ass (album), by Badfinger

ASS may stand for:

• ASS (car), a French car made from 1919 to 1920
• ASS (gene), a human gene that encodes for the enzyme argininosuccinate synthetase
• Acta Sanctae Sedis, a former Roman monthly publication and gazette of the Holy See
• Advanced SubStation Alpha, a subtitles editor in computing
• American Sociological Society, the founding name for the American Sociological Association
• Angle-Side-Side, a faulty proof in mathematics

See also

• AS (disambiguation)
• Asshole (disambiguation)
• Asso, a town and commune in Lombardy, Italy
• Gluteus maximus muscle

This disambiguation page lists articles associated with the same title. If an internal link led you here, you may wish to change the link to point directly to the intended article.

This entry is from Wikipedia, the leading user-contributed encyclopedia. It may not have been reviewed by professional editors (see full disclaimer)

Dansk (Danish)
1.
n. - æsel

2.
n. - røv

Nederlands (Dutch)
ezel, stommeling, reet

Français (French)
1.
n. - âne, idiot, imbécile

idioms:

• make an ass of oneself    se rendre ridicule, se conduire comme un idiot

2.
n. - (US) cul, anus (vulg), coït (vulg)

Deutsch (German)
1.
n. - Esel, (fig) Dummkopf

idioms:

• make an ass of oneself    sich blamieren, sich lächerlich machen

2.
n. - Arsch

Ελληνική (Greek)
n. - (ζωολ., μτφ.) γάιδαρος, βλάκας, ζωντόβολο, (καθομ.) πισινός, κώλος

Italiano (Italian)
culo, stronzo, asino

Português (Portuguese)
n. - asno (Zool.), ignorante (col.), nádegas (f pl)

Русский (Russian)
осел, задница, идиот, невежда

Español (Spanish)
1.
n. - burro, asno, borrico, jumento

idioms:

• make an ass of oneself    hacer el ridículo

2.
n. - culo

Svenska (Swedish)
n. - åsna, arsle

中文（简体）(Chinese (Simplified))
1. 驴子, 笨蛋, 白痴, 傻子

2. 屁股

中文（繁體）(Chinese (Traditional))
1.
n. - 驢子, 笨蛋, 白癡, 傻子

2.
n. - 屁股

한국어 (Korean)
1.
n. - 당나귀, 바보, 고집쟁이

2.
n. - 엉덩이, 항문, 여자 성기

日本語 (Japanese)
n. - ロバ, ばか者

العربيه (Arabic)
‏(الاسم) حمار, شخص احمق أو ابله او عنيد‏

עברית (Hebrew)
n. - ‮חמור, טיפש‬
n. - ‮טיפש, תחת‬

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