bridesmaid

Portrait of two bridemaids.

Bridesmaid and junior bridesmaid. North Carolina, U.S.A.

A young bridesmaid at a wedding in Thornbury Castle, South Gloucestershire, England

A bridesmaid is a girl or young woman who attends to the bride during or after a wedding or marriage ceremony. Traditionally, bridesmaids were chosen from unwed young women of marriageable age.

In early Roman times, bridesmaids formed a kind of bridal infantry as they accompanied the bride to the groom's village. This "protective shield" of similarly outfitted bridesmaids was supposed to intervene if any wayward thugs or vengeful suitors tried to hurt the bride or steal her dowry.

However, the Western bridesmaid tradition seems to have originated from later Roman law, which required ten witnesses at a wedding in order to outsmart evil spirits believed to attend marriage ceremonies. The bridesmaids and ushers dressed in identical clothing to the bride and groom, so that the evil spirits would not know who was getting married. Even as late as 19th century England, there was a belief that ill-wishers could administer curses and taint the wedding. In Victorian wedding photographs, for example, the bride and groom can look very similar to other members of the bridal party.

The principal bridesmaid is called the maid of honor (or matron of honor if she is married).

A bridesmaid is often a close friend or sister. Often there is more than one bridesmaid: in modern times the bride chooses how many to have. Historically, no person of status went out unattended, and the size of the retinue was closely calculated to be appropriate to the status of the personage.

Bridesmaids are often called upon to assist the bride in the planning of the wedding. A bridesmaid is also expected to play a role in the planning of the bridal shower and the bachelorette party. It has become customary for the bride to present her maid of honor and bridemaids with gifts as a sign of gratitude for the support and financial commitment that comes with their roles.

"Bridesmaid" as an idiomatic term

The term "bridesmaid" itself has also come to refer to one who comes close to attaining what is desired, only to fall just short, alluding to the fact that though a bridesmaid plays a large role in a wedding, she is not the one for whom the ceremony is given nor is she the center of attention. Commonly recited expressions about this member of the wedding party are "always a bridesmaid, but never a bride" and "thrice a bridesmaid, never a bride"-- an old charm that can be broken by being a bridesmaid seven times.

The term is used especially commonly to refer to a sports team or athlete that routinely comes close to winning an award or championship, only to come up just short. Jason Kidd of the New Jersey Nets had stated, for instance, that he was tired of being the "bridesmaid" after two consecutive losses in the NBA finals (to the Los Angeles Lakers in 2002 and to the San Antonio Spurs in 2003). Other notable bridesmaid teams during the 1990's were the Buffalo Bills, Utah Jazz, the England Cricket Team (for reaching the finals of the Cricket World Cup thrice and not winning it even once) and the New York Knicks.

This idiomatic usage of the word bridesmaid most probably began in 1917 when Fred W Leigh and Charles Collins composed "Always a Bridesmaid":

‘Why am I always a bridesmaid,
Never the blushing bride?
Ding! Dong! Wedding bells
Always ring for other gals.
But one fine day –
Please let it be soon –
I shall wake up in the morning
On my own honeymoon.’

In 1925 the Listerine Company used it in their ad campaign, claiming that at the root of the 'always a bridemaid' syndrome was halitosis, or bad breath. ^{[1] [2]}

References

1. ^ http://www.listerine.com/history2.aspx?id=766
2. ^ http://your-scottsdale-wedding.com/wedding/scottsdale-weddings/always-a-bridesmaid-never-a-bride-by-vlady-peters/

See also

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