If you got to tell a lie, make sure it's simple and easy to remember.

Whenever a adult tells you to listen carefully and talks to you in a real calm voice do not listen. Run as fast as you can because something real terrible is just around the corner. Especially if the cops are coming.

Rules and things Number 16

If a grown-up ever starts a sentence by saying "Haven't you heard," get ready, 'cause what's about to come out of their mouth is gonna drop you headfirst into a boiling tragedy.

Rules and Things Number 28

Gone=daed

Rules and Things Number 29

When you wake up and don't know for sure where you're at and there's a bunch of people standing around you, it's best to pretend you're asleep until you can figure out what's going on and what you should do. Rules and Things Number 39

The older you get, the worse something has to be to make you cry.

Rules and Things Number 63

Never, ever say something bad about someone you don't know -especially when you're around a bunch of strangers. You never can tell who might be kin to that person or who might be a lip-flapping, big-mouth spy.

Rules and Things Number 83

If a adult tells you not to worry, and you weren't worried before, you better hurry up and start 'cause you're already running late.

Rules and Things Number 87

When a adult tells you they need your help with a problem get ready to be tricked - most times this means they just want you to go fetch for them.

Rules and Things Number 118

You have to give adults something that they think they can use to hurt you by taking it away. That way they might not take something away that you really do want. Unless they're crazy or real stupid they won't take everything because if they did they wouldn't have anything to hold over your head to hurt you with later.

Rules and Things Number 328

When you make up your mind to do something, hurry up and do it. If you wait you might talk yourself out of what you wanted in the first place.

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