Flanders and Swann

The British duo "Flanders and Swann" were the actor and singer Michael Flanders (1922–1975) and the composer, pianist and linguist Donald Swann (1923–1994) who collaborated in writing and performing comic songs.

Michael Flanders

Between 1956 and 1967 they performed some of their songs in their long-running two-man revues At the Drop of a Hat and At the Drop of Another Hat. Both revues were recorded in concert along with several studio-based tracks.

Musical partnership

Flanders and Swann both attended Westminster School — where in July and August 1940 they staged a revue called Go To It^[1] — and Christ Church, Oxford, two institutions which are linked by ancient tradition, but the pair went their separate ways during World War II. However, a chance meeting in 1948 led to a musical partnership writing songs and light opera, Flanders providing the words and Swann composing the music. Their songs have been sung by performers such as Ian Wallace and Joyce Grenfell.

In December 1956, Flanders and Swann hired the New Lindsey Theatre, Notting Hill, to perform their own two-man revue At the Drop of a Hat, which opened on New Year's Eve. Flanders sang a selection of the songs that they had written, interspersed with comic monologues, and accompanied by Swann on the piano. An unusual feature of their act was that, due to Flanders' having contracted poliomyelitis in 1943, both men remained seated for their shows: Swann remained behind his piano, and Flanders used a wheelchair. The show was successful and transferred the next month to the Fortune Theatre, where it ran for over two years, before touring in the UK, the United States, Canada and Switzerland.

In 1963 Flanders and Swann opened in a second revue, At the Drop of Another Hat. Over the next four years they toured a combination of the two shows in the UK, Australia, New Zealand, Hong Kong, the United States and Canada, before finishing up at the Booth Theatre on Broadway. On April 9, 1967 they performed their last live show together. Ten days later, they moved into a studio and recorded the show for television.

Over the course of 11 years, Flanders and Swann gave nearly 2,000 live performances. Although their performing partnership ended in 1967, they remained friends afterwards and collaborated on occasional projects.

Timeline

source: Sleeve notes to the CD box set "The Complete F & S"

21st century

The style and presentation of Flanders and Swann have been parodied by British comedians Alexander Armstrong and Ben Miller in their sketch comedy television series The Armstrong and Miller Show (2007) although the lyrics of the latter-day songs are somewhat more ribald than those of original duo.

Songs of Flanders and Swann

Flanders and Swann's songs are characterised by wit, gentle satire, complex rhyming schemes, and memorable choruses. Flanders commented on At the Drop of Another Hat

They wrote over eighty comic songs together; the following selection gives an indication of their range:

• "All Gall" — a political satire based on the long career of Charles de Gaulle. At the time of writing, de Gaulle had recently vetoed the UK's first application to join the European Economic Community.
• "Bedstead Men," a wry explanation as to why there were old rusty bedsteads in ponds and lakes throughout the UK.
• "First and Second Law" — perhaps the only comic song ever written about thermodynamics.
• "The Gasman Cometh" — A round exasperating that no job ever gets fixed without creating another, relating the visits of a succession of tradesmen, each coming to repair the damage left by the one before him.
• "The Hippopotamus" — one of Flanders and Swann's best known songs ("Mud, mud, glorious mud"), and one of a range of songs that they wrote about different beasts, including "The Gnu", "The Warthog" and "The Armadillo".
• "Ill Wind" — Flanders' words sung to a slightly cut version, with cadenza, of the rondo finale of Mozart's Horn Concerto No. 4 in E flat major, K. 495. Swann accompanies on piano, since Flanders has had his horn stolen.
• "In The Desert" ("Верблюды", lit. = "camels") — a "traditional Russian" song, performed by Donald Swann, with an English-language translation after every line. The song is extremely repetitive, rendering the translation largely redundant, to Flanders's further annoyance.
• "In the D'Oyly Cart" — a satire of the D'Oyly Carte Opera Company, it was first performed in the revue Oranges and Lemons (1948) and revived in Penny Plain (1951). It was included as the first track on Flanders and Swann's 1974 album, And Then We Wrote.^[3]
• "Madeira M'Dear" — a song about seduction, full of complex word-play, including three oft-quoted examples of syllepsis.
• "Misalliance" — a political allegory concerning a love affair between a honeysuckle and a bindweed.
• "P** P* B**** B** D******" or "Pee Po Belly Bum Drawers" — a song comparing the use of profanity among the intelligentsia to playground swearing.
• "The Reluctant Cannibal" — an argument between father and son, disputing the topic of cannibalism (Son: "Eating people is wrong", Father: "Must have been someone he ate" — "he used to be a regular anthropophaguy").
• "Slow Train" — a nostalgic song about the railway lines and stations being closed by the Beeching Axe in the late 1960s. Not all of those mentioned did in fact close; the St Ives Bay Line from St Erth to St Ives remains open, for example.
• "A Song of Patriotic Prejudice" — (The English, the English, the English are best! I wouldn't give tuppence for all of the rest!)
• "A Song of Reproduction" — satire on the (then very topical) mania for do-it-yourself hi-fi. ("Raise the ceiling four feet, move the fireplace from that wall to that wall, you'll still only get the stereophonic effect if you sit in the bottom of that cupboard.")
• "To Kokoraki" (Το Κοκοράκι, The Cockerel) — A modern-Greek children's song, equivalent to "Old MacDonald's Farm" adding a new animal noise for each verse. Flanders, feigning impatience with it, says sarcastically "We must have it in full some night. Alternated with The Ring Cycle".
• "A Transport of Delight" — with an increasing refrain about the "Big six-wheeler, scarlet-painted, London Transport, diesel-engined, ninety-seven–horse-power om-ni-bus".
• "20 Tons of TNT" — a song about thermonuclear weapons.
• "The War of 14–18" — a translation of a French song by Georges Brassens, this song 'celebrates' World War I.
• "The Wompom" — a tale about a fictitious creature/plant/raw material and the British Industry that stems from it.
• "Twosome: Kang & Jag" (Kangaroo and Jaguar). The title is a pun on Cavalleria rusticana and Pagliacci which because of their brevity and complementary sound are often played together and are known simply as "Cav & Pag".

Songs on At the Drop of a Hat

At the Drop of a Hat was recorded twice. Once for a long-playing record in 1957, and again on 2 May 1959 by engineer George Martin. The latter recording, of the last performance at the Fortune Theatre, was pressed as a CD in 1991.

• "A Transport of Delight" 5:53
• "Song of Reproduction" 7:06
• "The Gnu Song" 3:26
• "Design for Living" 3:52
• "Je Suis Le Ténébreux" 2:27
• "Songs for Our Time" ("Philological Waltz" / "Satellite Moon" / "A Happy Song") 4:16
• "A Song for the Weather" 2:05
• "The Reluctant Cannibal" 3:55
• "Greensleeves" (monologue) 7:51
• "Misalliance" 3:55
• "To Kokoraki" 5:05
• "Madeira M'Dear" 3:52
• "Too Many Cookers" 3:12
• "Vanessa" 3:55
• "Tried by the Centre Court" (monologue) 3:45
• "The Youth of the Heart" 4:17
• "The Hippopotamus Song" 3:12

Songs on At the Drop of Another Hat

Recorded during a performance at the Haymarket Theatre, London, in 1963.

• "The Gas Man Cometh" 6:44.
• "Sounding Brass"
• "Los Olividados" (monologue) 6:38
• "In the Desert" 3:45.
• "Ill Wind" 5:01
• "First and Second Law" 2:56
• "All Gaulle" 3:53
• "Horoscope" 1:10
• "Friendly Duet" 2:20
• "Bedstead Men" 3:16
• "By Air" (monologue) 6:17
• "Slow Train" 5:26
• "A Song of Patriotic Prejudice" 2:51
• "Built-Up Area" (monologue) 3:22
• "In the Bath" 2:34
• "Sea Fever" 3:55
• "Hippo Encore" 1:16

Songs on The Bestiary of Flanders & Swann

This collection was recorded in studio, with no audience.

• "The Warthog" (The Hog Beneath the Skin) 4:14
• "The Sea Horse" 1:31
• "The Chameleon" 1:01
• "The Whale" (Mopy Dick) 3:29
• "The Sloth" 3:14
• "The Rhinoceros" 2:36
• "Twosome: Kang & Jag" 2:04
• "Dead Ducks" 0:41
• "The Elephant" 2:40
• "The Armadillo" 3:52
• "The Spider" 2:21
• "Threesome: Duck Billed Platypus/The Humming Bird/The Portuguese Man-O'-War" 1:05
• "The Wild Boar" 2:23
• "The Ostrich" 2:56
• "The Wompom" 5:52

Songs on Tried by the Centre Court

Fifteen songs that were part of the stage show at one time or another, released 1977. Seven of them were included on the 'Bestiary' CD (as The Extiary) to make up the running time.

The title derives from a synonymous monologue reflecting Flanders' love of Tennis, his mocking dislike of tennis umpires both at the centre of the court (at the net dividing the players) and on the most prestigious court in a venue, the Centre Court; and is also an allusion to it being like a legal trial at a the central criminal court.

• "Twice Shy" 4:12
• "Commonwealth Fair" (a parody of Scarborough Fair) 4:06
• "P** P* B**** B** D******" 6:20
• "Paris" 4:05
• "Eine Kleine Nachtmusik Cha-cha-cha" 0:31
• "The Hundred song" 1:09
• "Food for Thought" 3:55^[4]
• "Bed" 3:19

Songs on And Then We Wrote

A BBC Radio production, 1974

• Introduction
• In The D'Oyly Cart
• Prehistoric Complaint
• The Album
• There's A Hole In My Budget
• Seven Ages Of Woman
• Fragments
• Pillar To Post
• Guide To Britten
• Excelsior
• Rain On The Plage
• Last Of The Line
• Rockall
• The Lord Chamberlain's Regulations

Songs released as a single

These were the only two songs recorded with musical instruments other than the piano. They were also included in The Extiary.

• Side A: "20 Tons of TNT" 2:30
• Side B: "The War of 14-18" 2:15^[5]

Monologues

Flanders' comic monologues include:

• "By Air" — about the vogue for air travel. "I agree with the old lady who said, 'If God had intended us to fly, He would never have given us the railways.'"
• "Tried by the Centre Court" — a Wimbledon match between Miss L. Hammerfest and Miss Joan Hunter-Dunn. "They are bashing a ball with the gut of a cat".
• "Greensleeves" — about the background to the composition of the famous English air. An annotated version, explaining all the jokes, is here.
• "Los Olividados" — describing a festival akin to bullfighting, where the bull is replaced with an olive. The title is a reference to Los Olvidados, or "The Forgotten Ones", a 1950 movie by the director Luis Buñuel.
• "Built-up Area" — a prehistoric inhabitant of Salisbury Plain complains about a new development: Stonehenge.

Footnotes

External links

• Donald Swann's website
• Flanders and Swann web site

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More spoken articles

• Flanders and Swann: At the Drop of a Hippopotamus " — A show which tours UK theatres with a production of Flanders and Swann songs.
• A tribute to the songs and monologues of Flanders and Swann by actors Mark Marlowe and Jonathan Roberts
• Article by Stephanie Flanders about her father.