Pedophiles are people who are sexually attracted to children, in other words, those who have pedophilia/hebephilia. While "pedophiles" are commonly used to refer to people who sexually abuse children, this usage is inaccurate and can spread myths about both abuse and pedophilia/hebephilia. Essentially, confusing child sexual abuse with pedophilia/hebephilia makes the act of sexual abuse seem like an unchosen condition, and can make pedophilia/hebephilia seem like a choice where neither is the case.
A child who is disabled in some fashion, from a single-parent household, or a child with some other kind of life difficulty is generally more at risk from sexual abuse than children from stable households. Those who sexually abuse children do so for a very wide variety of reasons, and many of these reasons are separate from the intent to hurt a child. Some child sexual abuse is situational, some is perpetrated by juveniles who have been sexually abused, and rarely, some is specifically targeted by adults.
90-95% of those who sexually abuse children are generally those trusted in the community with no criminal record (90%, Characteristics of Crimes Against Juveniles, Finkelhor and Shattuck, 2012; 95%, Does A Watched Pot Boil? A Time-Series Analysis of New York State's Sexual Offender Registration and Notification Law, Sandler, Freeman, and Socia, 2008).
Because of this, it is more important to look for behavioral signs in adults and older youth towards younger children than it is to note risk factors in potential victims, and use these signs to ask the person about what you saw.
Some behavioral signs can include
- Ignoring boundaries
- Ignoring a child's wishes
- Refusing to let children have boundaries
- Using a child for physical or emotional support
- Using sexual language around children
- Secrets and secretive behavior
- Making excuses for no reason
- Insisting on alone time with a child
- Interest in a particular child's sexuality and relationships
- Substance abuse
- Ignoring a child's inappropriate behaviors
- Appearing to be an ideal role model
Writing down in a notebook what behaviors you saw, the date you saw them, and from whom can be helpful, and Stop It Now! has more information about abuse prevention, and how to start a conversation with someone who may be at-risk for sexually abusing a child. In general, asking someone something like, "Hey, I saw something that doesn't make sense. I saw you insisting on spending alone time with Bob. Can you explain that to me?" can be a good starting point for a conversation. Suspicions or allegations that abuse is occurring should be reported to a child advocacy center, child protective services, or to law enforcement.
