In the United States you must apply for a marriage license and then have someone perform the ceremony in order to enjoy the full legal benefits of marriage.

They now do. In January 2013, Boeing announced that they will now treat same-sex spouses equal to opposite-sex spouses for the purpose of survival pension benefits in states where same-sex marriage is legal, including Washington state, where they have extensive operations. They also stated that they will do so throughout the United States, even in states that ban same-sex marriage, if the United States Supreme Court strikes down the Defense of Marriage Act ("DOMA") that currently prohibits federal recognition of same-sex marriages in the United States.

The VA receive supplementary benefits from the United States Government, these include compensation and/or pension benefits even if they have received military pay.

Yes