spinster

"It won't be my fault if I die an Old Maid." For I've not got a lad/ Although I'm turned one-and-twenty.

"Poor Old Maids"

A spinster (or old maid) is a woman who has never been married, though it is usually applied only to women who are regarded as beyond the normal age for marriage, which has varied between cultures and eras.

History

"Spinster" was a legal term appended to the name of a woman whose occupation was spinning cloth as early as the 14th century^{[citation needed]}, but in the 19th century it came to denote still-unmarried women, spinning being a way for them to earn their living by working at home^[1].

The term is also of legal use in some places; in the United Kingdom, for instance, until the introduction of the Civil Partnership Act 2004 any woman never previously married was categorized as a "spinster" on a marriage licence, regardless of her age at the time the licence was issued (with a never-married man being listed thereon as a "bachelor").

Spinsters were another result of the two World Wars, where male war deaths drastically reduced the number of males available for marriage. For example, in the First World War, Britain lost approximately one million young men, and France and Germany each lost approximately two million. This made it impossible for millions of younger women in these countries to find a man to marry. The image of the old spinster with a fading photo of her dead World War I soldier/boyfriend on her mantlepiece was common in movies of the 1950s and 1960s.

Stereotypes historically perpetuated about spinsters include sexual and emotional frigidity, frumpiness, depression, moral virtue, religious devotion, victim of an oppressive mother and family caretaker. There used to be quite a stigma related to being a spinster^[1], but this has somewhat disappeared in modern Western Civilization along with the establishment of women's rights to vote, and pursue career goals as well as changing social mores regarding non-marital sexual relationships and advents in birth control.

In history and the present day, spinsters have been judgmental toward available men -- to the point where they are unable to find a mate they are willing to accept. In the 19th century, "middle-class spinsters, as well as their married peers, took ideals of love and marriage very seriously, and ... spinsterhood was indeed often a consequence of their adherence to those ideals. ... They remained unmarried not because of individual shortcomings but because they didn't find the one 'who could be all things to the heart.'"^[2].

In the 19th century, at least one editorial encouraged women to remain choosy in selecting a mate -- even at the price of never marrying. An editorial in Peterson's Magazine, titled "Honorable Often to Be an Old Maid," advised women: "Marry for a home! Marry to escape the riducle of being called an old maid? How dare you, then, pervert the most sacred institution of the Almighty, by becoming the wife of a man for whom you can feel no emotions of love, or respect even?" ^[2].

Today, similar pro-spinster writers argue that spinsterhood is an empowering choice, one not necessarily linked to romantic or sexual abstinence. The website Spinster Spin exemplifies this attitude in "Love and the Modern Spinster" (excerpt):

Granted, most people think of a “spinster” as someone who doesn't have romantic relationships. Historically, a spinster was a woman whom love had passed by, who had never “been chosen” for marriage or motherhood.

As modern spinsters, however, we do our own choosing. We embrace romance and relationship, but with a consciousness of both the joys and the costs involved. We know that it’s nice to wake up next to a warm man, but that the trade-offs are that he’ll likely leave the toilet seat up and forget to pick up his underwear. We understand that the ideal and the reality of love must be taken together, and so we feel no impetus to radically change the men we become romantically involved with. And as permanent single people, we also do not invest energy in evaluating whether men are "marriage-material." This orientation gives us a power in relationships that is (sadly) not always accessed by our married (or marriage-minded) sisters.

Popular culture

Stereotypical spinster characters have been portrayed in various films. Bette Davis played the title role in The Old Maid (1939), where she played an unwed mother named Charlotte. She played another spinster, again with the name Charlotte in Hush... Hush, Sweet Charlotte (1964). Katharine Hepburn specialized in playing spinsters in the 1950's such as Rosie in The African Queen (1951), Jane Hudson in Summertime (1955), and Lizzie inThe Rainmaker (1956 film) (1956). A common theme in the fiction writings of author/poet Sandra Cisneros is marital disillusionment; she has written the poem "Old Maids" (1994). Paul McCartney composed a hit song 'Eleanor Rigby' in 1966 -- the classic song is about loneliness and death of a spinster.

In Australia, parties are held for young single people to meet and socialise (particularly in the rural areas), these events are known as Bachelor and Spinster Balls or colloquially 'B and S Balls'.

Episode 69 and fifth season of the HBO series Sex And The City titled Luck Be An Old Lady dealt with Charlotte being increasingly fearful that she's become an old maid on her 36th birthday. She gives herself an Atlantic City style makeover and stuns the girls with her new racy, red lipstick look. Miranda gets her a gag gift of playing cards titled "old maid" and the characters discuss why women are labelled spinsters and men get bachelor "no matter how shriveled up their dicks are," added by the character Samantha.

Since spinsters and old maids, by definition, do not have a desire and/or the relationships skills necessary for marrying, they traditionally do not have children. As a result, unpopped popcorn kernels have been dubbed "old maids" in popular slang, because they do not "pop." ^[3].

In the animated television show The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy Billy's aunt Sis was a spinster before marrying Nergal.

References

1. ^ ^{a b} Deborah J. Mustard: Spinster: An Evolving Stereotype Revealed Through Film. January 20, 2000, Journal of Media Psychology
2. ^ ^{a b} Zsuzsa Berend: 'The Best Or None!' Spinsterhood In Nineteenth-Century New England. Summer, 2000, Journal of Social History
3. ^ Slang dictionary definition Slang City

External links

• Spinster: An Evolving Stereotype Revealed Through Film, by Deborah J. Mustard

See also

• weaving (mythology)
• Moirae
• Single

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