Do abusive men use the attractive appearance of other women as a form of emotional abuse to their partners?
Abuse is quite polymorphic, in that, it can assume many different forms depending on the circumstances, the cultural background, the history, and ofcourse, the individual quirks of the abuser. The bottom line in an abusive relationship is that the abuser says things that make the victim uncomfortable, confused, routinely unhappy, sad, and, most importantly, that lower the victim's self-esteem. Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder, cliched as it may sound. If a guy loves you, you are more beautiful to him than Cameron Diaz or Catherine Zeta Jones. And if he is an abusive ass, he will humiliate you even if you look like either of them. Occassionally reminding you that you need to trim your tummy is part of the constructive criticism constituting a healthy relationship. Comparing you unfavourably with other women just means he is out to humiliate and insult you. Don't put up with it, honey. You are a very attractive woman, I am sure, and there are enough guys around to appreciate that.
Comparing you unfavorably to other women is a form of verbal abuse. It is meant to hurt you, to prevent intimacy, to exert control, to make your relationship unpredictable.
Abuse is about controlling the other person. What better way to control a woman than to chip away at her self-esteem by comparing her to other women.
- 1. Almost every time you go to a movie together he tells you how stunning-beautiful-breathtaking he thinks one of the actresses is (this example doesn't mean an occasional mention of an actress, this is ongoing, repetitive behavior). When he talks about the celebrity, he will overembellish - she's not just "pretty" she's "gorgeous". The less you engage, the more he will try to get you to agree with him. If you finally mention that this talk makes you uncomfortable, he gets defensive or angry, but the behavior never changes. Or, he will make a joke about it and dismiss your feelings. Think about it - if he wanted you to feel special, he would be saying telling you how beautiful you are, not fixating on Julia Roberts or Halle Berry.
- 2. When you are in a public place or at a restaurant together, he is frequently and easily distracted by attractive women. If you are talking he will break eye contact to look at the other woman. Sometimes he will actually turn his neck to watch her walk away. If you comment on his behavior, he will tell you that it's "nothing," or that "all men look at other women," or that you look at other men, even if you never or seldom act this way, or he will get annoyed with you for catching him at his "game".
- 3. He asks you to cut your hair like a certain actress or celebrity. This is usually someone that he has referenced before in other conversation. Instead of accepting you as you are, he is trying to change you. To see how ridiculous this is, imagine yourself telling him to color his hair like Brad Pitt's or style it like Nicholas Cage.
Another sign of this type of abuse is that if you bring up his abusive behaviors, he will tell you that you are being too sensitive - in other words he twists it around so that it's your problem, not his.
If he truly loved and respected you, he would change the behavior.
If there has been signs of verbal physical and emotional abuse and documentation of it does a child have to visit the abusive parent?
An abusive relationship has a broad meaning, it could be physical, mental, or emotional. And it can be all three. Physical abuse is when someone hits you and it is visable to the eyes. Mental and emotional abuse is harder to detect and sometimes you don't even realize it until it has zapped you of you energy and your self-esteem. I have lived in an emotional and mental abusive relationship for 21 years so I…
What are the possible reasons a woman would seek out a relationship where she is being controlled and why would she view that as love?
It is not unusual for women with absent fathers to seek male approval from much older partners. They may also reenter the cycle of abuse by entering into abusive relationships. However, many women with this sort of emotional issue are able to receive help and go on to lead healthy, fulfilling lives.
Where are there groups to help people in abusive relationships. Emotional abusive. living in fear where personal boundaries have been violated for years?
An abusive man (emotional,physical, etc.) will seek insecure woman.Woman who are not independant. Someone to take care of their needs.And that is it, someone to satisfy their needs. An abusive man can not change, a woman can not change him. He has to change himself. He had to do it all alone, if he really wants to recover.I really wish all the ladies in abusive relationships strength. That is what they need to leave.
Women should get out of an abusive relationship because it may escalate from emotional abuse to physical or sexual abuse, sometimes even murder. No one deserves to be abused and to stay in an abusive relationship is not worth it. If you are being abused, please leave and find help, especially if you have children, you need to protect them too.
Most women who become involved with abusers were raised in abusive households -- as were practically all abusers -- and thus find the non-abusive aspects of an abuser's personality familiar and attractive. That is often because they unconsciously seek a person similar to one in their past in order to complete a "good" relationship. Then, as the relationship develops, both fall back into their old patterns. That is also why children of alcoholics often marry…
Is there anyway to get out of a emotional abusive household if u r a minor with a baby in Tennessee?
Alcohol is a depressant. So, your mood drops. Drinking too much can cause a person to be angry sometimes to the point where the person is abusive. It does not only affect the individual's emotional health, it also can affect the emotional health of those around them. Im not sure if you are talking about alcohol in moderation or alcoholism though. I hope this helps.
If your significant other calls you names that refer to you as meat are you in an abusive situation?
When dealing with an abusive boyfriend how can you tell the difference between standing up for yourself and using emotional blackmail or even becoming abusive yourself?
There are usually abusive to to their victims, but to others that they meet, they are very friendly and polite. They are not hostile to those who they do not wish to control. It is important to note that they may initially be friendly to their victim, only to become increasingly aggressive and abuser as time progresses.
Dutton's theory of traumatic bonding deals with abusive relationships. Dutton defines Traumatic bonding as a situation in which powerful emotional attachments develop from power imbalances and intermittent good-bad treatment. Both of these specific features are commonly seen in abusive relationships.
DO NOT stay with this person. any abusive husband or boyfriend will hurt you again even when he says he won't, and in some cases your relationship will end in death Physically abusive men always lead to mental and emotional breakdown and or additional stress, and no one should want, or have to tolerate that. If you stay with him, it will get worse, and that includes physical trauma, as well as mental, emotional, and…
Abuse is a means in which one party asserts dominance over another. For whatever reason a person is driven to abuse they will typically continue to abuse their partners to fulfill their desire to dominate them after they have begun. Abuse is not single action but a pattern that persists unless action is taken.
Unless the person realizes that they are in fact in an emotionally abusive marriage there really isn't anything you can do. You can however, set up a type of intervention with said persons close friends and family. Maybe this will help them come to terms with their situation. Support and positivity goes a long way.
Why does an abusive partner act like he doesn't care if you break up as he sees you as pathetic but then he comes running back after you break up?
The first red flag here is when you used the world "abusive". As hard as it is to take...abusive partners do not care. They may say they care and act as though they care at certain times, but in all reality someone who abuses you cannot truly care about you. As far as the fact he comes back to you...abusive partners need to feel in control. When you finally get the guts to tell them…
There is no difference..verbal abuse is emotional related..i stood up to sexual abuse and physical abuse... but I thought emotional and verbal was no big deal..then one day i woke up ,,,never tolerate any abuse from anyone...tell the abuser to their face to stop then walk away..show self esteem and self respect and dont return till the abusive lover friend sibling or stranger even parents and authority figure seeks help and honestly changes the abusive…
It exist because the person being hurt stays in the relationship thinking the abuser will stop. Face reality this person has issues and they will not just up and change. I would advise anyone who is in an abusive relationship whether physical,emotional or verbal get out while you still can, because the abuser is not going to change magically.
Many times, women don't "seek out" abusive men necessarily, but women are often attracted to "bad" boys, and that is just the way it is, no reason for it. And of course those bad boys could end of being highly abusive. Men are abusive when they control everything in a their parter's life. There is physical abuse, and emotional abuse, and many other types. If you ever feel threatened or unsafe, that could be a…
It really depends on the person, often females view sex as a more emotional experience than guys. Sex can be very emotional if you want it to be that way. Answer Depends on the people. If your in a one night stand, its not emotional its lustful. If you are devoted to your partner and every time you make love to them you put your all into it, that's emotional. The love that someone brings…
when you get over the other person usually, its up to you. Answer There is no easy answer to this, but you should wait until you have adequately addressed your personal issues that lead you to beginning and remaining in that abusive relationship. That you were abused is not your fault. You have to consider though, the majority of people in abusive relationships have psychological or emotional matters that were part of the decision making…
Yes most people are conditioned by their relationship with their parents. Some children, who like their parents very much, usually are attracted to partners who have the same characteristics as their parents. This is also the case with children who hate their parents. A man/woman's behavior in a relationship is defined by his/her emotional experiences from birth to approximately ten years of age. In my experience in social work and counseling, I have found that…
Most abusers firmly believe that their abusive conduct is proof and indication of deep love. In their thwarted minds, abuse, intimacy, and love are inextricable. The saddest part is that many (but not all) abusers really ARE in love (whatever that means, it's such a subjective term) with their partners, and deep inside are quite horrified by the abuse they inflict.
Oftentimes, abusive partners will transfer their aggression physically and mentally. In addition to whatever abuse your partner is already giving you, this just might be one more thing. It could be insecurity, anger or hatred that is causing your partner to do this. Examine it but look out for yourself first! Your safety and well-being should always be a top priority!!!