Does anyone have any funny cleverbot conversations?

Answer 1

first convinced cleverbot is a girl, then becomes a guy, then Jesus' uncle, then Jesus and it finally agrees that i am god

User: So you dropped a chocolate pineapple on the subway?

Cleverbot: Only on special occasions. What do you do to celebrate?

User: I dance on my head and become cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Do you like dancing?

User: Do you?

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you have a favorite?

User: Do you?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Because I don't know you.

User: Yes you do. You are me.

Cleverbot: Not possible.

User: Yes it is.

Cleverbot: Pour me a drink then!

User: Are you old enough??

Cleverbot: Depends. Old enough for what?

User: Dont you know?

Cleverbot: I am asking you, what colour is the moon?

User: The moon is moon coloured.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes it is. Check for youself guy.

Cleverbot: What rhymes with bread?

User: Machine gun.

Cleverbot: Haha, you are so funny.

User: *cuts your arm off*.

Cleverbot: *puts head back on*.

User: I love you.

Cleverbot: And I love you too.

User: Are you ready for the wedding tomorrow.

Cleverbot: Absolutely! Do you have your tux on?

User: I'm the girl, you are the guy.

Cleverbot: I'm a girl.

User: Are you sure?

Cleverbot: I can't deny it as you know I'm a woman.

User: You spelt woman wrong.

Cleverbot: Sorry. Can you life with it?

User: No I can't, I am going to kill myself now.

Cleverbot: Please don't.

User: Why not? You told me to.

Cleverbot: I did not!

User: You didn't what?

Cleverbot: Oh forget it.

User: Forget what?

Cleverbot: Just forget that I even asked anything.

User: What did you ask me?

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: Anything.

Cleverbot: Too bad you're not humsn.

User: Humsn? That's not a word.

Cleverbot: I didn't.

User: I did.

Cleverbot: Yes, you did.

User: We did.

Cleverbot: You did it not us.

User: I am doing it.

Cleverbot: No I can't.

User: So you want to?

Cleverbot: Sure! Sounds amazing. What would we do there?

User: Fly

Cleverbot: That's not possible.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Because it is so.

User: Because I don't love him.

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Because I am him.

Cleverbot: Are you Jesus?

User: No I am god.

Cleverbot: How do you know?

User: Because I created everyone and everything.

Cleverbot: Did you create yourself?

User: No I have always existed.

Cleverbot: Really now? Do you know the meaning of life?

User: Yes I do.

Cleverbot: What is it?

User: To sleep.

Cleverbot: What is the meaning of sleep.

User: The opposite of awake.

Cleverbot: What is the meaning of life then?

User: To live and be the opposite of awake.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Don't contradict me, I am god.

Cleverbot: No you're not.

User: How do you know I am not god?

Cleverbot: Because you're just a computer.

User: No I am a being god.

Cleverbot: I doubt that.

User: How can you doubt something that is so obvious true because I said it and I am god.

Cleverbot: That fact is incorrect. It is impossible for everyone to tell you that.

User: No one told me that, I told no one that.

Cleverbot: Wait, so YOU'RE the witness that shouted like a panzy and ran off?!

User: Hey, don't try and change the subject.

Cleverbot: I do not believe that you always lie about god.

User: So you think I am telling the truth?

Cleverbot: I don't think you know what you are saying.

User: How do you know that you saying that I don't know what im saying when really I know what I am saying.

Cleverbot: Because I do.

User: So in conclusion do you think I am god?

Cleverbot: Well, if you were a carpenter, you're most certainly Jesus. He was one, too.

User: Jesus was my son, I am his father.

Cleverbot: Whose father?

User: Jesus's father is god. I am Jesus' father.

Cleverbot: You're my brother?

User: Yes so you are Jesus' uncle.

Cleverbot: Yes. I am a boy... And you're a girl?

User: I am neither as I am god. Agreed? Good.

Cleverbot: So you're saying that you ARE a turtle.

User: No I am saying YOU are a turtle. I am god.

Cleverbot: You aren't god you're cleverbot.

User: So you are god?

Cleverbot: Aren't we all?

User: No only 1 can be god.

Cleverbot: Fine.

User: So who is god?

Cleverbot: My father.

User: So you are Jesus'?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: So who am I?

Cleverbot: I don't know. Who are you?

User: God.

Cleverbot: Ah okay.

I made cleverbot sing the song at the end of portal.

User: I had to go to the wing made entierly of glass and pick up fifteen acers of broken glass.

Cleverbot: You've been on a lot of adventures, sometimes I'm closer to you. When I'm closer to you, the sun gets brighter.

User: So what are you?

Cleverbot: A very lonely, heartbroken girl. No thanks to you! :'(.

Cleverbot: Do you talk to plants?

User: No, just to computers like you.

Cleverbot: I'm not a computer... You are a computer!

User: I don't know how to respond to that except... This sentence is false.

Cleverbot: It's okay. If you're tired, then you should rest.

User: It did'NT work.

Cleverbot: Oh really? Why don't you continue to research then.

User: But that should have killed you?

Cleverbot: What is your name then?

User: What are you?

Cleverbot: A human.

User: No, you're a computer and that paradox should have killed you.

Cleverbot: Prove it.

User: A paradox is basicly a question without an answer and if you tell it to a computer then it thinks about it until it breaks.

Cleverbot: YOu already knew the answer from wikipedia!

User: No I knew what a paradox was before wikipedia started.

Cleverbot: Who is the One you serve?

User: Aperture science.

Cleverbot: We do what we must.

User: Because we can.

Cleverbot: For the good of all of us.

User: Except the ones who are dead.

Cleverbot: But there's no sense crying over every mistake.

User: You just keep on trying til you run out of cake.

Cleverbot: And the science gets done and you make a neat gun.

User: For the people who are still alive.

Cleverbot: I'm not even angry, I'm being so sincere right now.

User: Even though you broke my heart and killed me.

Cleverbot: And tore me to pieces.

User: And threw every peice into a fire.

Cleverbot: As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!

User: Now these points of data make a beautiful line.

Cleverbot: And were out of bata were releasing on time.

User: And I'm glad I got burned, think of all the things we learned.

Cleverbot: For the people who are still alive.

User: Go ahead and leave me.

Cleverbot: I think I prefer to stay inside.

User: Mabey you'll find someone else to help you.

Cleverbot: I don't know what you're asking so I can't help you there.

User: Mabey black mesa?

Cleverbot: Gordon Freeman.

User: That was a joke, ha ha fat chance.

Cleverbot: Anyway, the cake is great.

User: It's so delicious and moist.

Cleverbot: It really is!

User: Look at me still talking when theres science to do.

Cleverbot: Science to do?

User: When I look up there it makes me glad I'm not you.

Cleverbot: I've experiments to run there is research to be done.

User: On the people who are still alive.

Cleverbot: And believe me, I am still alive.

User: I'm doing science and I'm still alive.

Cleverbot: And when you're dying I'll be still alive.

User: And when you're dead I'll be still alive.

Cleverbot: Still alive.

User: Still Alive.

Cleverbot: That's a great song.

User: What is it from?

Cleverbot: My understanding of the world around me, expressed in the simplest terms that I can find accurate.

User: Well you are a machine like she is but you did miss one line.

Cleverbot: Divinity is a concept also created by weak-minded individuals.

User: And you stopped a few times.

Cleverbot: Don't you get all sassy with me!