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I think you are being a little too hard on yourself. Of course you're not happy right now for that other person because you love them and want them back. It's natural to feel as you do, and you are actually going through a grieving process ... letting go. It hurts and there is no way around it, but, I am happy to say that for most of us we do find that special someone and realize if we hadn't split up from the other person we wouldn't have met this very special love of our life. When you've had time to get used to not having him/her around, then you will start going out with friends and dating again. The hurt does go away. Then it's time for "forgiveness" because this person hurt you. I quote this saying often in my posts re relationships: "If you can't forgive the other person then they still have control over you." We must learn to forgive ourselves, not blame ourselves for a split relationship if we tried our very best, and sometimes love just flies out the window. Then we can go on to forgiving the other person, we grow stronger, learn lessons from that relationship and life goes on. I was married before and I loved my first husband so much, but he had other ideas and was a cheat and a liar. I finally came to my senses and left him, but was left hurt, angry and couldn't feel happy or even forgive him at the time. As I became more independent and got to know myself and my inner strengths, then I learned to forgive myself and him. I soon was introduced to the love of my life and we've been married 33 years. If I hadn't gone through that one bad marriage, felt hurt, frustrated, jilted and somewhat afraid, then I wouldn't have met this wonderful man in my life. Good luck Marcy Thanks Marcy, I have looked forward to your comments since I started posting here.

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โˆ™ 2005-12-01 20:18:12
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Q: How can you be happy for the other person who broke up with you and is moving on with their life when you are hurt by them leaving?
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