Mental Health
Abusive Relationships and Domestic Violence

How can you help your 26-year-old verbally and emotionally abused daughter?

Top Answer
User Avatar
Wiki User
Answered 2007-02-13 10:52:30

It may take awhile for her to realize what is happening and then another while for her to gather her nerve/energy to leave. The best you can do is to hear her out and offer her a non-judgmental place to talk about it. As stated below, you can also take her to an intake office, but it is best to do it under cover of some activity, so her husband has no idea where she is going. If you have a distinctive car, make sure to park out of sight of the roadway. I have been through this myself, and the counselors were very well equipped to help me move from my situation. Actually, they were better than friends since they weren't involved and had the boundaries to not become involved. If you can afford it, a week or so of vacation away from the abuser may also make the issue clearer to her--like a cruise or somewhere he cannot follow. In no case should she give him any idea that she plans to leave, or pack when he is home. The month surrounding a departure can be very dangerous for the victim. If possible, it would be better for her to go somewhere that he cannot find her or contact her until she gets her bearings. It is very rare that the abuser will permanently change his ways without the benefit of time and space. Unless she can see that the man she is with does not know the meaning of love there isn't much you can do. You can suggest you will back her 100% and make an appointment at the "Abused Women's Center" in your area. If you find it hard to find then just phone mental health. They will direct you. The Abused Women's Center will take your daughter into the counselor and go over her history. They are use to seeing tears, frustrations, fears and even the abuser threatening her or taking children away. This is what abuser do ... brain-wash their victim, take their independence and self esteem away and put the fear of God into them that the victim can't make it out on her own and no man would ever want her, plus, take the children away from her or even threaten to kill her or her family. There are counselors in the Abused Women's Centers that will go with her to court. You daughter will be put into a "Transition House" or "Safe House" where no one will know where she is with perhaps the exception of you and her counselor. There she will have to take programs which will give her the tools to get her self esteem back, learn not to choose the same abusive partners and most importantly not to go back to her abuser (which is common.) They will help her find work as well and get her on her feet. If she agrees with you then have her pack her bags (just the very essentials) and leave to come home when her abuser has gone to work. It's obvious he will either phone her with threats or possibly come to your home and if this happens call the police immediately and press charges! Don't be surprised if your daughter says, "But I love him" because she will honestly believe this and also will believe he doesn't mean what he does (make excuses for his actions) or she can change him. If this is the case your daughter is an adult and there isn't much you can do about it. If your daughter and her abuser have children then you can report it to Children's Aid so at least the children are out of the abusive environment. Don't feel sorry for your daughter because if she chooses to stay there is no reason the children should have to live in such an environment. If the children are taken away from her and her abuser then she is more apt to try and help herself. I wish you luck! God Bless If she is still in the relationship, get her to realize that she is worth much more than the abuser treats her. Bring her to sit ins for abused women and let her hear their stories and possibly gain strength to move on with her life in a more healthy way. The abuser will prey on her until she shows that she has the strength to get away from him. Listen to her, too, if she wants to talk, see how she feels, get her some self esteem books and bring her around positive people. Ive heard of alot of success if people like you go to the abuser with many others and denounce him and his ways, with her present and let him know that he will no longer be tolerated and is no longer welcome in "her" circle of strength. They are sad individuals, not to be pitied though because they are chosing to treat another person so indifferently for their own benefit. We all need to ban together against abusers of any type and let them know this is not their world its everyones to share and if they dont know how, then they need to go.

User Avatar

Your Answer

Still Have Questions?

Related Questions

How do you know if you are being emotionally abused?

If you are feeling bad about the way you are treated or spoken to - and your pleas to stop this kind of behavior went unheeded - then you are being emotionally (verbally, psychologically) abused.

Im sick of being emotionally and verbally abused how to you turn it around on him?

Leave and let him find another victim.

How do you get your 7-year-old stepson to tell you how often his mother verbally abuses him without him telling her that you are questioning him?

You can begin talking, generally, about the effects children experience with being verbally and emotionally abused, including in the context of peer-to-peer bullying. Your child may never open up to you directly, but you can convey your feelings about knowing children are abused verbally and emotionally.

Is there a test to take if your parents verbally abused you?

If you have to ask... Then you are probably being abused verbally.

What do i do if i am being emotionally verbally and now physically abused?

Get help immediately, because no one should go through all that.

How can a child be abused?

Mentally, emotionally, sexually, verbally, physically, and even legally if the system is used to abuse the child (eg visiting rights)

How can an emotionally mentally and verbally abused man get his kids back away from controling dangers mom?

Kill her! I repeat, kill her! Any questions? None? kill Her!

In what ways can children be abused?

Children can be abused mentally, physically, sexually and verbally.

Do men and women have different reasons for infidelity?

Yes, For men it's mostly sex. For women it's mostly being unfulfilled emotionally , or being verbally or physically abused.

What are some ways women get abused?

phisically or verbally.

What are some ways that kids who are abused are abused?

sexually physically mentally emotionally

Was eminem sexualy abused?

Yes, according to interviews, rapper Eminem was in fact sexually abused as a child. He was sexually abused and verbally abused by his step father.

How can a woman know that she's verbally or emotionally abused by the husband?

If she is always walking on egg shells around him, or he is never happy or satisfied. If he has a pattern of abuse in his past. It could be that he watched his dad abuse his mom.

How people in the population get bullied?

they are abused physically and verbally maybe at school or home and may be abused online

How did Hitlers father treat him?

He was physically and verbally abused by his father.

If i get verbal abused and emotionally abused can i leave the house but I'm only 14?

yes. you may. i did.

How can a boy be abused by his girlfriend?

The same way a girl can be abused by her boyfriend: Physically; Mentally; Emotionally.

Where to get help when being verbally abused?

Your local Domestic Violence Crisis Center.

If you are 16 and pregnant can you move out in Alabama if being verbally abused?

you have to move with a adult

Was Nicki Minaj abused as a child?

Nicki Minaj was abused by her father. Physically and emotionally, not sexually (as many rumor to be).

If you are 14 and you are being emotionally abused in Florida can you move out?

Go to the police.

Is it illegal for a child to be verbally abused by the mother?

depands on what illegal drugs shes taken

Why was Michael Jackson's childhood hard?

His father abused him not only physically but emotionally and verbally. At a very young age Michael also had to become an adult and deal with the real world. He never got to do the things regular children did which is why he seemed so childish.

When a minor lives in Maryland and has been physically and verbally abused by the parent the minor does not live with in Florida does the minor have to visit the parent that abused them?

no you shouldn't but if you want to you can

How do you help your son who is being emotionally abused by his father?

they can help by geting them help

Still have questions?