How did people grow into being gay?

Answer 1

People are born gay or straight (or bisexual).

or they chose to have sex with other then their opposite sex.

many reasons:

sick in a head, want to try something new, influenced by others, low intellect...

Answer 2

Most scientists researching this question are seeing their research pointing to at least a biological if not genetic origin of sexual orientation. This evidence is increasingly showing that sexual orientation, whether gay, straight, or bisexual, is probably set very early on--if not in the womb or at conception. In other words, sexual orientation is inborn.

Now, many people--particularly people who are opposed to homosexuality on especially religious grounds--reject this theory, saying that there are a lot of examples of people who were gay who have been "cured" and "made straight" through various kinds of "therapy," whether psychological or religious.

However, it is important to remember that the American Psychological Association (the national organization of professional psychologists) does not take up when or how sexual orientation is determined but it does say that there is nothing inherently wrong or unhealthy with non-straight sexual orientations; the APA further considers therapy meant to "cure" homosexuality to be at most ineffective and at worst extremely harmful to the health of people who have same-sex attraction or are gay. This kind of therapy is part of what is called the "ex-gay" movement, but it is important to note that there have been scandals in recent years of supposedly "cured" gay people being caught in gay bars or engaging in gay relationships, and the largest ex-gay organization in Great Britain actually disbanded a few years ago because they realized they were having no success in curing people--slowly coming to the realization that sexual orientation cannot be changed.

Now, people who believe that sexual orientation can be changed are usually confusing homosexuality and heterosexuality with bisexuality; obviously someone who is bisexual can be sexually attracted to people of either sex, or conditioned or taught to seek out relationships or sexual experiences with only the opposite sex. However, truly heterosexual and truly homosexual people cannot truly change their sexual orientation; at best, they can become celibate (avoiding sex), which is not the same thing as changing one's inborn sexual orientation. More and more research will be done in this area in the next decade, and it is likely that one or more biological or genetic sources of sexual orientation will be found. However, it is safe to say that sexual orientation is at least inborn and not something chosen or mutable. It's simply the way someone is born.

The only way is to be gay is to be born that way. There is no way to become gay.

It is currently agreed among the majority of psychologists, geneticists, biologists, physiologists, sociologists and other scientists that you do not "become" homosexual, heterosexual, or bisexual, you are born that way. It is not something that can be changed at will. We are predisposed genetically to be physiologically attracted to men or to women, regardless of our own gender, it is not a choice and not something wrong with you. This information is based upon scientific study.

There are religious opinions and beliefs that vary from this, but the consensus and conclusions among scientists and medical professionals is currently that you are born with your sexual orientation already established. If that is true, then one doesn't "become" gay, any more than one "becomes" straight.

Generally, you are who you are. Many knew very early in life that they were not straight. Trying to tell you the exact moment I knew I was gay would be like a straight guy telling you when he knew he liked girls. If you're straight, ask yourself: "When did I know I liked people of the opposite sex?". Chances are you can't give a definitive answer, or if you can, it was probably pretty early on in your life.

There are people who don't acknowledge their orientation until later in life, usually because of society's pressure to "conform". That's less common now than it was in the past, but it still happens, especially if the person either thinks that their family/friends would disapprove, or if they themselves have some sort of negative feelings towards gay/lesbian people. It may seem to others that when this type of person "comes out", that they've "become gay". They haven't, they've just acknowledged a part of them that existed long before they accepted it themselves.

An answer from a nurse:

Take it from someone with medical training: no one consciously chooses their sexual orientation any more than they choose their eye color.

Contrary to the statement "Similar to how the urge to kill is not destiny, the urge to have any particular type of sex is not either. Courts never condemn anyone for any leaning towards whatever action, just what they do," there is no comparison or commonality between murder (or any crime dealt with by the courts) and a person's sexual orientation. That implication is not appropriate.

Suppression and denial are also not appropriate, and even attempting them causes mental and emotional conflicts that are very unhealthy, even physically. Using "therapy" to undo your inherent* orientation has no basis in medicine, the sciences of psychology, psychiatry, anatomy nor physiology, and is disproved to the satisfaction of most medical professionals and those objectively studied in the subjects.

Humans cannot decide what arouses them sexually. Having sexual libido is built in as much as is hunger, it is an instinct*; somewhat of a human "destiny"*, if you choose that terminology. Sexual attraction is a very powerful and natural feeling and is deeply imbedded in most all animals, including humans, as it is innate* for survival of animals.

If you believe in a higher power as I do, it is also surely a design of the creator of everything in all the different manifestations that exist. Sexual activity is an important aspect of human life and sexuality is completely normal and healthy, regardless of what gender arouses your libido. It is inherent* to human life and we do not choose what engages our libido.

• Definitions/synonyms:

Merriam-Webster definition of instinct:

"A largely inheritable and unalterable tendency of an organism to make a complex and specific response to environmental stimuli without involving reason."

Merriam-Webster synonyms for inherent: "Built-in, constitutional, constitutive, essential, hardwired, immanent, inborn, inbred, indigenous, ingrain, ingrained (alsoengrained), innate, integral, intrinsic, native, natural, in one's blood."

Merriam-Webster definition of innate:

"Existing in, belonging to, or determined by factors present in an individual from birth : native, inborn <innate behavior>"

Merriam-Webster definition of destiny:

"A predetermined course of events often held to be an irresistible power or agency."

Answer:

Human sexuality is very complicated, and the majority of people are neither completely heterosexual or completely homosexual, even if they don't acknowledge it, or try to repress it. Human sexuality can be measured on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being completely straight, 10 being completely gay, and 5 being completely bisexual.

Someone who is a 2 or a 3 (mostly straight, but with some homosexual feelings) might never act on these feelings -- or even acknowledge that they have them -- until they are, say, 33 years old. Or 46 years old. And then all of a sudden, they meet someone of the same sex whom they really click with, and they enter into a relationship with that person. It's not that they becamegay. They are simply acting on their feelings for the first time. And if and when that relationship ends, they may very well go back to heterosexual relationships.

Or, someone might be completely gay, or almost completely gay -- say, an 8 or 9 or 10 -- but have spent their entire lives in severe denial. Eventually, they may come to terms with their sexuality, and decide to come out of the closet (for example, a married man leaving his wife for another man). Again, it's not that they are suddenly gay. They are just coming to terms with themselves.

There is no way to artificially manufacture homosexual feelings (in other words, you cannot "get gay" or make yourself gay). Nor can you eliminate these feelings or will them away (in other words, you can't make yourself straight). You can repress the thoughts and desires, but you can't make them go away completely.

Contrary to what some people might believe, people do not become gay because they were molested when they were children. This myth is often used to purport the claim that homosexuals are likely to be child molesters themselves. This is absolutely, 100% NOT true. Pedophilia and homosexuality are two completely separate things. In fact, the words "homosexual" and "heterosexual" can't really be meaningfully applied to many pedophiles. To put it simply, child molesters are aroused by children, not by men or women. See the Related Link below for more information. Becoming gay is not a specific act of volition. Rather it is a part of our personality or mental identity. Nor does it always manifest itself from the start. Many people have started life in a straight relationship and discovered later that they were unhappy. It is part of the voyage of discovery we all make in finding out who we are, our likes and dislikes are purely personal, nor can we explain them all. Some like sweet foods others savoury and, like homosexuality, you cannot tell just by looking who has which preference, nor can the individual claim the preference will always remain the same.

Answer 3

You are born gay. People figure this out about themselves at different times in their lives and some never do. Some figure it out and wait to act on it or never do. The sooner a person can figure it out and live their lives accordingly, the happier they will probably be.

Answer 4

People don't grow into being gay, they are born gay, therefore it is unavoidable and must be accepted by society.

Answer 5

He doesn't, he is born gay. One can't choose to be a homosexual (gay) or heterosexual (straight).