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Meditation and Yoga

How does meditation help couples get along?

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August 01, 2009 3:03PM

Meditation is great for mind, body and soul, but it's not magic. If your partner and you are having problems, you can meditate until the cows come home and he won't change one bit. Most men think secretly that there is nothing wrong with them and it's always the woman who has the problem. Even when most couples go to a marriage counseller the man MAY go along to placate his wife, but isn't really serious about it at all and seldom tries to mend the marriage and so, I doubt unless your partner has either suggested this on his own it will work. Meditating takes a lot of hard work and commitment and I don't think he will stick it out. It's a learning process to combine mind, body and soul and hours of work. You just don't shut your eyes, hum and magic happens. Sometimes if the problems in the marriage are difficult ones it's best to have a trial separation and if you were meant to be together then you will be.It reduces the tensions, angryness between couples.

The fundamental goal of meditation is actually to get to the *core* of your goals, needs and desires, bypassing as the superficial stuff that clouds the decision-making process. In order to succeed, you need to get beyond the superficial, robotic reactions that you've developed over time, or the notions of socially acceptable or expected ideas. When you meditate with the goal of reaching the "self" (using whatever techniques you choose, or trying to reach whatever goals you seek), you have to stop trying to solve problems on the spot. You have to stop letting short-term results impact on the way you think. By clearing your head completely -- and this does take time, dedication and effort -- you can let your memories, needs and wants "bubble up" more smoothly. The notion of "Nirvana" is simply the act of reaching that pure realization of the basic things that make you tick. So what I'm getting at is that, indeed, meditation can be a fabulous technique to determine what exactly each person wants. While therapy does the same thing, this allows you to figure out what you need from the relationship if it's going to work. It lets you come to grips with where you really want to be in life. More importantly, you can determine if this partner is someone who can be with you through that. Especially when you are wrapped up in tense relationship dynamics, little hang-ups can make actions and words clouded by emotions. You don't make rational decisions that are good for the long-term. Meditation can help you get to the long-term, fundamental things that can either heal a relationship or make you realize it should end.