How long to expect a thank you note for a shower gift?

Answer 1

Social etiquette has taken such a bashing over the years, but there still remains a rule of thumb; if it's a wedding shower, up to thirty days may be considered. This rather long period is due to the assumption that the soon-to-be bride is laboured with the pressures of arranging the wedding and wedding party.

If it's a baby shower, there is even more to consider. If the baby has been born, imagine the challenges a new mother, with baby in tow is facing. It may take some time indeed. Also, were there any known complications? That may extend the situation, or even possibly foregoing social etiquette of letters. And in this more enlightened world - is it possible at all that the mother is suffering from post-partum depression? Doing anything at all can be a real challenge.

Now, after consideration of the above, we must also consider that the idea of writing a thank-you card has never come across the mind of the recipient, especially if you were there! It may be that the recipient said 'thank you' at the shower and never considered writing a note to say 'thank you' again.

Most important is that you not stew over it too much. Stewing can cause wrinkles, and wrinkles are far more serious than a thank you note!