no, eventually it will heal
All piercing shrink down once the piercing is fully healed and the jewellery is removed, yes the hole is pretty much permanent.
Yes.
yes it is the most painful piercing
Please answer
It sounds to me like your talking about a dermal or a horizontal navel piercing which is a surface piercing. But from the sound of it it's a dermal piercing because I've never seen a surface piercing with 3 balls unless there 3 different piercing in a row. I could help you more if I saw a picture of what your talking about.
You won't have that problem if you go to a professional.
If the 12 year old has had the piercing for over a year, chances are good it's healed. If it was done by a piercing gun, then it could still be healing.
If there is room you can but why?
If the piercing is recent, very carefully, once it is healed, you can clean it as usual.
It's best after the piercing is healed, otherwise it might get infected and swell up.
Usually the piercer will have numbing gel which they will put on before piercing, but if you want it numbed find out before you have it done!
Drinking alcohol before the piercing has healed may result in pain as the alcohol irritates your tissue. It isn't toxic, and it shouldn't interfere with the healing of the piercing. After the piercing has healed, there should be no problems or inconveniences related to drinking alcohol, even red wine.