Was Odysseus a good leader?
He was not a good leader in some aspects, Though his men followed him for 10 years.
Odysseus kills Antinous first because he was the suitor's leader, both morally and politically. Antinous was the richest, loudest, most obnoxious, and most ungrateful of the suitors. He abused Odysseus by throwing insults and then later a chair at him. Further, Antinous doesn't suspect a thing, and Odysseus must eventually kill them all anyways.
Odysseus was witty and thoughtful. He was compassionate and he was thoughtful of his men. He also encouraged his men to stay strong even though the times were tough. His crew respected him because he was kind to them and treated them as friends. Odysseus was also very wise found brilliant solutions.
The leader of the suitors is Antinous, an arrogant dirtbag who plots to have Telemachus (Odysseus's son) killed. the next highest-up suitor is Eurymachus, a devious and manipulative suitor. The only "good" suitor is Amphinomus, as he stands up for Odysseus and actually seeks Penelope's hand in marriage, not just the kindgom's riches. They all are killed rather spectacularly.